One of my flatmate's parents - who live abroad - have invited us all out for dinner at a restaurant. I was wondering if I should bring a gift, and if so, what should I bring? If not, should I offer to pay for something *I'm only a student btw*
2007-02-27 04:06:29 · 9 answers · asked by mosey 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Thank you all for your helpful comments so far! Sorry... I should add... is it thoughtless to give the gift afterwards, since they are here for the week?
2007-02-27 06:46:46 · update #1
Well, if their offering to take you out then i wouldnt worry about it but you could bring something small for the mom like a flower....the polite thing to do is not ASSUME their paying so i would offer and then just go with the flow...If the waiter says is this all one check then you could say seperate checks and if the parents insist on one then you dont have to worry about it the rest of the night....
2007-02-27 04:13:10 · answer #1 · answered by P!NK 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My thought is that if I invite someone to dinner it assumed that I am paying for the event unless it is discussed that we will each pay for ourselves. Handleing a welcome gift is easier when that dinner is a first visit at a person's home. If you do decide to give a small gift make sure it isn't too expensive because that can feel awkward to a recipiant that is just meeting you. If you know of a hobby the new person enjoys getting a token that relates to that is often a nice gesture. I am a musician. Once a person who met me for dinner brought a beautiful guitar pic to me. It was very low in cost but I still have it and think of that person every time I see it. Most people know when students are poor. Anyone who has been a college student will relate to that. Don't feel obligated to bring anything other than your best manners and have a great time!
2007-02-27 04:29:38 · answer #2 · answered by cammsters 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your flatmate what they think and if they say you should just come and eat and enjoy yourself then do just that. Be very polite and appreciative to the parents for the nice evening out and don't order the mega $$ meal or any fancy appetizers. Appetizer choice should be deferred to host.
Dress nicely and plan to listen as much, if not more, than you speak. Alcohol consumption should be very low if at all. Let host offer and take your cues from them if this is an alcoholic beverage meal or not. If they don't then you don't.
Following up with a short thank you note would be nice but this day and age is not commonly done anymore.
2007-02-27 04:35:36 · answer #3 · answered by Orpah! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I won't bring a gift, but I would offer to pay. Go as far as to hand them some money when the bill comes. If they refuse, polite ask once again. If they still refuse, just say thank you and let them pay. I always offer to pay, but if people refuse more then once, then I just let them pay. Most people won't refuse if they didn't want to pay for you. If they want you to pay your share, then they will accept the money.
Just watch what you eat when you go to the restaurant, don't order anything too expensive, so that your portion of the bill isn't too high.
2007-02-27 04:20:25 · answer #4 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not think it is necessary but first ask you flat mate what he/she thinks. Should you offer to pay a little. If the answer is no, then go out and pick up something small, like a box of chocolates Or maybe some wine for them. You can buy good wine cheap. If they do not drink, then go back to your flatmate and see what he/she suggests. Tell them it would make you feel better to contribute.
2007-02-27 04:16:33 · answer #5 · answered by Going Crazy 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If they invited you, they're generally expecting to pay the bill. A gift isn't out of the ordinary to bring -- ask your flatmate what would be appropriate, if anything.
2007-02-27 04:26:20 · answer #6 · answered by Jarien 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No gift necessary. You don't have to offer to pay neither. But do approach the bar early in the evening , before you have been seated and buy a round of refreshments- make sure you ask them what they would like to drink first-They are the parents and don't expect you to pay, but your responsibility is to compliment the choice of restaurant , the food and to thank them for inviting you .
Have fun!
2007-02-27 04:13:58 · answer #7 · answered by Georgie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A small gift,,,they have offered to pay, maybe an inexpensive bottle of wine for them. Shouldn't be more than maybe $15.00 u.s. For them at their age,,,it's the thought that counts.
2007-02-27 06:19:22 · answer #8 · answered by IwntYrHd 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, a gift is not required.
I would send them a card mailed to their home (when they leave) and among other things, thank them for a lovely dinner.
2007-02-27 09:37:55 · answer #9 · answered by Pacifica 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋