What should I do?

Question

I have a seven year old son and I have worked for the same company for 5 years. Durging this time, my son has had four childminders. The first he hated, the second decided to go back to school, the third put her prices up and was too expsive. The fourth? Well my mum lifts my son from school and drops him off to her house. When they arrived yesterday she told him(hes 7) that she sent me a text message yesterday saying she was ill and couldnt look after him. I never got this. Today she has text me (I did get it) to say shes sick again. Also, on two occasions I have went to lift my son and she has not been there but her husband.

What should I do?

My son isn't at all keen for a new childminder and to be honest I fell like giving up work. All our family work and so cant help out.

Answer 1

I have been a Nanny for some time now and that sort of behaviour from the childminder is crap. I would get rid of her. I have seen that it is really hard for kids to have someone new looking after them. They reject them and become difficult. My advice is (if you want to keep working) Get a fully trained Nanny Full time. You could cut down your hours so that you and the nanny and your son could do activities together. That way he wont feel rejected and you can keep an eye on the nanny.

Answer 2

Ask her in future to make sure she actually phones and speaks to you directly as it's not always certain that a message might get through.
Does your company offer any solutions to child care? Maybe worth enquiring about. Or could your hours be altered so your mum could maybe take him for just a little bit of time and you could get home earlier?
Unless I knew the people looking after my child very very well I wouldn't be happy with the husband turning up instead. It is her I would be paying so I would expect her to be fulfilling her part of the contract!She can't exactly call herself a childminder if she's not there looking after him! I think her behaviour is shameful. I hope you get a good solution to this without having to give up your work all for the sake of a useless childminder.

Answer 3

I know you're in a tough predicament! I've been there myself, which is why I don't work anymore. But I am fortunate enough to have a husband to take care of me and the kids. NONE of my family has ever helped with my kids. By the time my firstborn was 1, we had gone through 4 sitters! Daycare is way to expensive here, so that wasn't an option. We just couldn't find anyone reliable. And that woman leaving your kid with her husband is a bunch of crap!!! I would''ve fixed her a new a**hole that day!!! Sounds like you need to keep hunting, or look into a work-at-home job if you have to work. You didn't mention a husband, so I don't know if you're single. You might check around with some churches in your area. I'm not actually a member of one myself, but I've heard lots of ladies, and/or college students post sitter services at their churches. And they probably do it cheaper than a daycare center. Some towns even have after-school boys and girls clubs for working parents to send their kids after school. And they don't always advertise heavily, so start asking around. I hope everything works out for you.

Answer 4

If you are in the UK, you can ask your employers for flexible working hours. They do not have to give you the hours that you want but you may be surprised at how flexible they can be. Is it necessary for you to work past school finishing time? Perhaps you could consider reducing your hours slightly so you are there to pick him up from school. There will of course be less salary but then you will not need to pay out for a childminder every day.

Maybe some of your work can be done from home? Or at the weekend/evening when there may be some family member who can help you out?

Perhaps there may be someone at work who is in a similar position to you and you could start a job share and look after one another's child. I suggested this to my employer a few years ago and this has really worked. It benefits myself and my colleague but also the company as when they need both of us in at the same time when we are really pushed, we are more likely to want to help out.

Answer 5

I am a student and a new parent and working and parenting as you know can sometimes be a hassel. You on the other hand can give up your job of 5 years if, and only if you can handle your bills with or without the job. If you are working just to keep extra money in your pocket that you really don't need, I would suggest you to stay home with your little boy because he wants you to be home with him anyway. I think deep down, you already answered your own question and that is to resign from your 5 year job and become a stay at home mom. That's a job that pays well in smiles anyway..Good Luck

Answer 6

Firstly she is paid to look after your son not her husband, I would speak to social services.. I had a similar situation with a childminder always being sick with 5 Min's notice. Haven't you got a after school club that your son could go to?

Its hard but your son comes first and if your unhappy then this arrangement will not work! Have you looked at reducing your hours at work to fit in with your son??

Answer 7

There are usually some good programs in day care that will allow a school bus to drop your child off and you pick him up after work. Even though he might not like this arrangement at first, he will probably make friends his own age and come to like the arrangement. At the age of 7, children like to interact with one another and it will be good for your son's social skills. Just be careful choosing a good day care and you might try to find one that one of his friends already go to. Good Luck!

Answer 8

any friends he can stay with after school? Maybe the school has an after school program where he can stay as late as 6pm and even be dropped off as early as 6am. Thats how my son's school works for an extra charge of $2. an hour.

Answer 9

my sons school does a breakfast club and a afternoon club for parents who work i know they only charge a small amount, you take them in from 7-30 or 8-00 and they give the kids their breakfast i'm not sure of the after school hrs but its worth checking your sons school to see if they do this or if they are willing to give it a try

Answer 10

go with you gut feeling. its always a good idea. if you desire to stay home and its financialy possible do so. or mabe you could be a childminder for extra income, and be at home...just a thought