Huge dilema with boyfriend!?

Question

by accessing my boyfriends e.mails i have seen he has cheated on me three times by meeting random girls of the internet. i love him very much, obviously wont trust him again but does anyone have any ideas wot i should do now or been in this position?

thanks for responses.i have confronted him & with no choice he admited it, we r so good togther though and i love him very much, i know all it was about was lust for him and hel always love me but it is hard to get over. any suggestions how to make fresh start?

Answer 1

reading emails and letters of other people rarely bring us good news! You have moved from blissful ignorance into the dilemma of hurtful knolwedge, gained by less than ethica means. You have to take a view on where trust sits with your relationship, good luck

Answer 2

He has cheated on you three times? When are you going to get the hint that he is no good for you. If he respected you and LOVED you he would not cheat. You obviously are checking his email because you do not trust him. That is no way to be in a relationship. Leave him, find another man who will respect you and cherish you. This guy is probably using you. Love hurts, but it does heal, you will get over it. Let it be an experience and move on, there is someone out there waiting for you.

Answer 3

accessing someone's e-mails is invading their privacy by all means. unless your boy friend has given you a permission, but I doubt that if he has not deleted evidence of his online dates...

it is hard to confront him, as you would be feeling guilty that you read his e-mail. so instead of giving you advice what to do, i think you best know it, give it a time and maybe try to indirectly ask him if he would ever date anyone else while he is in a relationship etc etc, and then see what he says and make your own decision if this guy is honest with you.

if you had the choice to stay with this guy and love him the way he is without knowing about these affairs, wouldn't you have preferred you never read the e-mails

Answer 4

my boyfriend done this to me except it was txtin not emails. this was about 6 months ago and i feel i have got over it and we have made a fresh start but when im drunk it all comes out be careful if you really love him this will be really hard to get over. start dating him again instead of bein bf and gf go back to the fun random part of your realationship and you will see if things can work out. you should start to feel more comfortable with him after that then eventually what he done will be a distant memory. just keep a tight hold on him make sure he knows he cant stray again and if he does it will be over if he knows that he will be the best bf ever

Answer 5

I have been in a similar situation, I suspected my partner for a while of doing something he shouldn't and I checked his emails, he had been flirting over emails (and text too) with about 3 girls over a period of about 6 months, but none of the emails suggested he had ever met them - think it was just a fascination. I confronted him about it and got myself in so much sh*t by confessing to check his emails. But then he admitted that he had been texting people and emailing them - there was nothing in any of it, he had just been bored when he couldn't sleep in the night.

After 6 months of a rubbish time of ups and downs and lots of crying we decided to stay together and he hasn't done it again since. He just wakes me up in the middle of the night if he gets bored rather than going on line - I would prefer that than what he was doing.

good luck with your situation
x

Answer 6

Leave him, once a cheat always a cheat. If you speak to him about it he'll just have a go at you for going into his e-mails. Once the trust is broken there is nothing left because trust is huge in a relationship. You deserve better than someone like him, he could have given you anything from meeting other girls, especially if he didn't use anything. Please get out now x

Answer 7

it just amazes me that people come here and ask these kinds of questions, "what should I do, dump my husband boyfriend, divorce dump,kick to the curb?" these are not a simple friggin choice like what shall i have for lunch, these are life changing questions. Something that the person should take charge of them selves, but I guess thats whats wrong with this world, all these snotty nosed whinny asses wanting everybody else to tell them how to live their life.

and then, there are those that answer these questions with a novel of advice, I think these idgits are even worse off, they are miserable and want the asker to be just as miseable.

wake up and take chartge of your own life and stop telling other mental midgets how to live.

now, ya happy, ya just had me doing the sdame damned thing

Answer 8

well do you know he has actually done anything with these girls? it's one thing to meet up with them and another to cheat on you. As well, it's not exactly trusting of you in the first place to read his emails, but now you have you should be honest and open with him explaining why you did so that it doesn't become a two way argument, and then ask him about the girls. If he doesn't give you a satisfactory answer you can either dump him or give him another chance

Answer 9

i would say, you have invaded his privacy by reading his emails making it obvious that you didn't trust him in the first place. because you did invade his privacy i'm not sure he will trust you again either. a relationship is nothing without trust as i have found out to my cost in the past. good luck on what you decide but i would say, love him or not he's a cheat and can't feel the same way about you...end it now.... good luck again babe. XXX

Answer 10

Get out of the relationship - If he's cheating on you why stay?
Get checked for STI's
Learn not to invade other peoples privacy. Relationships require trust - if you can't trust them it's not the right relationship for you.