I am a 28 yr old guy, married a couple of yrs ago, my wife is 32. We discussed having children a while ago and decided we both don't have what it takes right now. It's quite complicated, coz we moved to a new country, don't have much of our own, but besides the financial strains and not being to provide too much, something else troubles us even more. We seem to not have that desire to produce offsprings, to make "others" like us. We're both Christians, we believe and trust God and sometimes wonder what He would like...It's quite difficult but I kno if I'm ever gonna have children it's gonna be coz I really-really want them. How do U feel (happily parents)? WHat drove U to become one? What did U feel at those moments, how did U decide? These things are very important for me coz I want to learn from the experience of others. And also I kno, no matter what I'm still gonna love and adore my wife, she's like my baby sometimes and I'm her baby to her. Answers will be highly appreciated !!!
2007-02-26 21:13:14 · 6 answers · asked by jonp1978 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well, the thing is even if I had money , a house , etc. I still don't think I would want children and that makes me feel guilty in a way
2007-02-27 03:39:42 · update #1
Be very very sure that you want children if ever you decide to bring some into this world. I wish everyone thinks the way you do before leaping into something so important. You should be very proud of yourself for thinking so hard about this subject. Children aren't always a joy, they can be very naughty, hyperactive and very ill, you have to take care of them all your life.
2007-02-27 04:02:52 · answer #1 · answered by jondavesnowy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi personally you will never know till you do it i'm a great believer in God to however my husband isn't we decided to let our children decide themselves what they choose to believe in only fair but back to your question . When we started our home and family we had nothing but love and yes we survived today we are quite well off and have a lovely home our daughters want for nothing so don't let finance stop you strive for what you want? Our lives are complete with our little family we are all always there for eachother we are like a team if one down the others pick them up we are very loving and thoughtful with eachother. Don't get me wrong there are days with teenage temper tantrums or tired grumpy parents but we all guide ourselves through these days and laugh about them, lots of people will say it's hard work when kids are teenagers so we must be lucky up to press they are 13 and 14 very responsible,polite and good. We never regret it and we were only young when we decided we wanted a family but thats why we did it so we could still be fit enough to enjoy their teenage years with them we do lots of activities together, my husband i still call my baby too we have a loving and good sexual relationship too contrary to the believe that your sex life is ruined when you have kids lol. At the end of the day only you and your wife can decide what is best for you and everybody has different experiences i'm sure all the best in whatever future you decide :)
2007-02-27 06:14:53 · answer #2 · answered by clare w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have each other right now, and are happy with that, why do you need children, you are still both young and there is time should you desire in the future to have children. Things and situations change, people and the feelings people harbor change, so enjoy your lives together and let God take control, everything will be alright. God Bless.
2007-02-27 05:47:13 · answer #3 · answered by Bethy4 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do u need others experience its only important if ur wife and u are ready someone else or other couples cant get u both ready for parenthood and the time or its time is just crap its time when u two decide its time just dont get pregnant then have abortion is all i say if ur not ready wait if u are then go ahead just make sure its good time for u two not the world
2007-02-27 05:30:34 · answer #4 · answered by getomorrowforme 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i knew i when i was ready for a baby, i cant explain how i knew but i just knew it was time, it took my partner another 18months or so for him to feel ready, but i dont feel i pushed him into anything, he says he has no regrets.....for us tho there was no right or wrong time, we are pretty skint most of the time and only have a one-bed flat right now, but to us none of that mattered, we had each other and a roof over our, no matter how small and we are happy. our baby is nearing 5months and we both love her to bits, proud of her and proud of ourselves for her (if that makes sense) when you are ready i think you'll both know, and if you find you are never ready then maybe it wasnt meant to be, at the end of the day only you can make the decison as to when or if to have children. am sure God wont judge you for not having any
2007-02-27 05:38:55 · answer #5 · answered by deni 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
y seeking for our advices? dont u know urself wat u want? if not try to evaluate on ur own. and dont think that parents always end up being happy with their kids no.... kids make u let down too at times so b prepared for those moments too. yes the biggest prob i can c with u guys is that u r going thru financial crisis. overcome those and then sit and decide and this is ought to b ur both independent decision so that u wont end up blaming anyone else. all the best.
2007-02-27 06:48:42 · answer #6 · answered by nice_lady559 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋