Ok, my boyfriend and i have been on and off for awhile and i love him sooo much, but I'm kind of scared to be with him when we get older because his dad was abusive to him and his stepdad is abusive to his mom and him sometimes i'm scared he'll get like that around me someday, but he is so nice and doesn't seem like he'll ever be like that so what should i do?
2007-02-26 12:06:58 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hello hotchik,
It seems like he's aware that he could act this way, as you are. As long as you both communicate your feelings with each other. I'm a firm believer that it take two to fight too. As long as you let him know that you won't put up with that behavior yourself, I think that it'll be OK. He's definitely been on the receiving end of that behavior and should be willing to work with you.
--Rick
2007-02-26 12:14:14 · answer #1 · answered by rickrudge 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because he's been exposed to abuse in the past does not necessarily mean he will be abusive. In fact, sometimes it has the reverse effect. After watching loved ones get abused and being abused himself he may very well make it a point to never lay his hand on another person. Unfortunately, it is also possible he can follow in his family's footsteps and become abusive. Do not avoid him or judge him based on this possibility. Just be careful and stay on the look out for any signs that show he may become abusive in the future.
2007-02-26 20:19:16 · answer #2 · answered by Love <3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although abusive patterns do run in families, i strongly believe that each person makes their own decision, bad and good. I don't think you should condemm your boyfriend for what has happened in his family but at the same time, i think you need to examine why you are concerned in the first place. If he's never done anything to you then why are you scared? Has he ever shown that he's likely to become violent or abusive? If not i think you need to give him the benefit of the doubt and if something does happen, get out.
Goodluck
2007-02-26 20:13:16 · answer #3 · answered by Alyeria 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he ever been aggressive toward you? like a bad argument or easily aggressive toward others even total strangers? You can chat with me more on this on yahoo messenger i am cargirl440
stephanie
2007-02-26 20:11:56 · answer #4 · answered by Inksexy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, he would only be that way if he sees them as role models, if he truely has no intention of doing what they did, why would he do that?
2007-02-26 20:10:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
things take time....the truth will reveal...just be patient and wait...i mean what can you possibly do...ask him?? no...you'll just be accusing him or something that he haven't or never will commit.
2007-02-26 20:11:11 · answer #6 · answered by smile 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you exactly the same as your parents?
2007-02-26 20:11:00 · answer #7 · answered by Funky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋