Why Do People Spank Their Children?

Question

I mean, they can as their way of punishment but why do they? Why do they think hurting their child is going to get their point across? If you hit them a little on their butt when they are little children that's ok but not when they are like, 11 or 12+ And anyways, spanking your children teaches your child that it is ok to hit people.

I'm never going to spank my children. I think there are other better ways to punish your child. What do you guys say?

And sometimes, it just makes them rebel more.

Or it makes them get angry at you for always spanking them, and they misbehave.

Yeah, people spank their 4 years old. Not 11+.

Answer 1

I say, you do it your way, and I'll do it my way. And, you can believe whatever YOU want, and I'll believe what I want (and have observed during my many life experiences which are: any kid I knew that never got hit, and got spoiled too turned into an irresponsible, impulsive, totally out of control adult). I'm not saying to beat the crap out of them, but if they don't listen to you, don't care if you give them time outs, etc, then they need their butts spanked.

Answer 2

I agree with you on just about everything u said. I also think the same way about kids growing up around any type of violence. It duz teach them that hitting people is ok. I am also a firm believer that at a very young age you need to teach them what things are ok and what things they should not be doing. First time they do wrong, a few light quick swats can do wonders.

I wanna also say that everyone should smile at a stranger at least 1 time a day. About 90 % of them will smile back. The other 10 % are the ones who need a spanking.

Answer 3

Yep, I said the exact same thing before I had a child. It all started when he was little and started to get into things that could hurt him. He absolutely did not yet understand the word "no". So it all started with a smack on the hand. Now he's older, and though he understands "no", as a child he still does things that will hurt him. Children will always test boundaries, but when it's their life at stake, a spanking is the least of my worries. So, when he starts trying to pull the plug covers out, even though he knows it "bites", you can bet I spank him. There isn't a soul in this world who could make me feel bad about it, and there's no one who could stop it. As a parent it is my responsibility to ensure the safety of my child, and make sure that he grows up to be a productive, respectful member of society, end of story.

Answer 4

I was spanked and I never thought it was okay to hit people because of it. It does not always hurt their self esteem. Where do you people get this stuff? Most kids/people who hit people were actually abused and not just spanked. MOST kids who were spanked came out just fine, they know their limits. A mother saying "NO sweety dont do that" doesn't help! When your kids are screaming running around the store, taking things off the shelf, doing whatever they want, what are you going to do? "No kids stop it..... please." Sure for some people that works, but when it doesnt then what? And once again people, it is not illegal to spank your kids, it is only illegal if you hit your kids with a closed fist.

Answer 5

Why would you agree that spanking little children is okay? Isn't all hitting at any age sending the wrong message to kids? I think people who spank lack intelligence and are from the old generation. They repeat the cycle and are proud of it. Spanking is not PROPER discipline. How many times are we going to hear "I was spanked and I turned out fine, I deserved it." You people did not turn out fine because you were spanked. What a load of cr**! Hitting is assault for everyone but a parent right??
oldschoolmom- are you in your late 50s or something? You have the same answer every time. (spank on the bare bottom) No wonder you are the top parenting answerer, this is your only advice for the same topic. Respect your wishes? How about respecting your kids. Imagine if they read all these answers you give, all the time you spend trying to convince people this is the only way to raise children? You threaten your kids and make them wait for their spanking? How terrifying that would be for them. The fear you put into their little minds. Do you think this is positive? I have talked to many adults in this situation when they were kids. They explain that fear as if it were today and are angry for it. Your wishes are for one purpose only! You.

Thanks Toosexxy- you are smart!

Answer 6

I was spanked, with a belt. It worked for me, a few times of that and I was good all the time. I swat my four year old on the butt, I don't use a belt or anything. He straightens up quick. Sometimes time out works, but it's hard to get him to stay in the corner. The problem with spanking is some parents get out of control with it.

Answer 7

I spank my 4 year old, and (although rarely) my 10 year old, and yes I'd spank her when she turns 11 if she needs it. Sure I'd hope with in the next year or two, they will grow out of needing them, but who knows. Spankings work, that's why we use them. I use any and every type of consequence out there. If the behavior calls for a spanking, then that's what they get. My oldest hates spankings, for her that's the worst, so that being said, it's the most effective. I have seen her try something when she knows the punishment is grounding, but I have never seen her try something when she knows a spanking is waiting for her if she does. They work. All 3 of my girls get spankings, and none of them have problems hitting. Quite the opposite from my experiences with parents who don't spank. I have seen more violent kids who have never had a hand laid on them, then ones who have.

Everyone has there own methods, mine work, I'll never try and convince a known anti spanker to spank. If they want to raise their children that way, fine. I only wish they would respect my wishes too.

Edit: SUFK: I hope I never run into your offspring. Your opinions are so off in left field it's not even funny. I think you realize your attempt at "shock tactics" to scare parents away from spanking is not working. I really don't care if you follow my answers via my profile just to thumb me down, It won't stop the message. FYI, current education on the subject of child rearing is dominated by the left wing, THAT IS WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!!!!! You can't respect others wishes because your parents never taught you respect. I suggest you learn some

Once again, SUFK, I responded, however once again you have no reply, because you know I am correct.

Answer 8

If you spank them on their butt when they are little children you won't have to do it when they are 11 and 12 years old - they will already know!! Just so you know - there is a difference between proper spanking and hitting - spanking does not teach your children that hitting is okay - spanking teaches your children that a particular behavior is unacceptable. When my kids disobey I explain what they did wrong, tell them what they should have done instead, and tell them to turn around and I give them one spank on their butt. I then hug them and tell them that I love them way too much to let them act that way. Not all people who spank are whacking their kids in anger and screaming at them.

Answer 9

i was spanked with a belt up to about 5 years old and up to 11 or 12 when I did something really bad (only 2 times) and I think it works because all my friends have been spanked and they are all very well behaved and the ones who werent spanked are the ones getting drunk and dropping out of high school. although, i agree that spanking should not be taken too far because my friend used to get spanked naked with a whip for every little thing and he is really messed up right now. he has been arrested twice for drug possesion with intent to sell and he smokes weed. he also goes to a reform school. so i believe spanking is okay only when it is necessary and when you dont take it too far.

Answer 10

Stick up 4 kids, you are a person after my own heart! I give you a thumbs up. You make people who are willing to listen sit there and think. You are obviously progressive in your thinking!
I also think that spanking at any age is unnecessary and cruel and can cause long-term damage.

Don't get me wrong. I believe in limits and firm consequences. Firm doesn't have to equal severe. It simply has to exist on a consistent basis. For those of you who have tried time outs or removal of toys, etc, and say they don't work, you are not doing it correctly. Parenting by the way is not meant to be convenient!

I wouldn't have dreamed of spanking my little boy under the age of four. My son didn't have problems with hitting. Why introduce a component, hitting, that teaches him it's ok to solve problems by lashing out at someone? That's a double standard and therefore a mixed message right there! I don't care what all you pro-spankers say. At 5 and a half he still doesn't have hitting issues. He's only been timed out twice at school, and not for hitting.

You are the role model. Children will emulate you and the way you solve problems. Don't think they won't do it? Try the school yard at recess. It's being done all of the time. My husband is a teacher. He gets the complaints from the parents after the fact by the children who are courageous enough to tell their parents. Some won't though.

I was spanked when I was a child and I was bullied by my peers who I know for a fact were also spanked. I didn't tell my parents because I didn't believe enough they cared to do anything about it. I also had very poor communication skills.. All I knew was to sit there and take it because they could overpower me. My husband grew up in a similar way.

Certainly for an older child, spanking is inappropriate. An 11 year old or 12 year old, particularly a girl, starts developing into a young woman and is going through a delicate time. Their hormones are kicking in. They could be on their periods. Even if you spank them on their pants that is unacceptable. Spank them bare. That's just plain sick, even if by the same sex parent.
There are many constructive ways to give consequences for a 12 year old.

Positive communication in the home makes it possible for parents to punish less and listen more. Many parents lack these skills. Many parents don't know how to give constructive feedback.

Feedback skills,both giving and receiving, are important for children to learn how to do in this world. Children need to know even when to give their parents feedback. Authority does make mistakes. When they are out there in the work world they will have the courage to give constructive feedback to their bosses as well as their peers. They wouldn't have to go through a community college program to learn the skill, like what I had to do, and even then I may have had the knowledge on how to do it, but I did not have the confidence.

I want to raise my son to grow up to be confident, bright, self-discplined. I want him to be able to think outside the box.

For those of you gave me a thumbs down, you have tunnel vision

Answer 11

Because there are some reasons why the child needs to be spanked. I was spanked when I was younger when I needed it and I turned out fine and I am really nice to children and I would never abuse one. When I have kids I am going to spank them when they need it, but not just for little things.