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I hosted a formal dinner party and invited quite a few people from the corporation who are important for my husband. I also invited my friend and she could bring a guest, which is her new boyfriend. The guy is not the kind of person I'd like to socialize with by choice, but I gave it a chance since he's my friend's new love.

I didn't know how it happened because I was busy in the kitchen helping the servers, but later on people said he actually asked the CEO how much he makes! We're pretty sure the big guy was offended, because he answered with something like none of your business. He's an old fashioned man in his late 60. He was very quiet during dinner and left way too early. I knew this man has always been friendly everytime I met him in other events. Now people in the office talked about like, 'I can't believe that guy talked to HIM like that.'

Do I need to write the CEO an apology letter because I was the host and responsible for inviting that rude person? What should I write?

2007-02-26 08:58:40 · 21 answers · asked by Speck Schnuck 5 in Society & Culture Etiquette

Why are rude people answering question in Etiquette section? Don't hate people because they are successful. My husband only makes probably CEO weekly salary in a year but we're not jealous!

2007-02-26 09:10:38 · update #1

The reason I need help because it's the big boss. If it was just my husband's colleague, I would have sent him fruit basket and card without fear of kissing butt.

2007-02-26 09:17:52 · update #2

21 answers

I wouldn't, but I would talk to your friend after her boyfriend's actions at the dinner party.

Had you or your husband said something like that, sure. Apologize. Honestly though the #1 rule in business is to not apologize if you didn't do it.

Although it sounds like a big deal, this is small. You aren't 100% sure that the CEO left because he was offended. Just let it go and next time don't let the best friend's boyfriend come to a dinner party.

2007-02-26 09:02:59 · answer #1 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 3 1

No way, don't write a letter that's going too far. If you happen to see the big guy, I think it's okay to briefly apologize for your friends' behavior. Most people would not take your guest so seriously and the whole situation could've been better if your CEO was more professional and laughed it off or humored your friend. Sorry, but being CEO doesn't make you above everybody else, you're still going to face random awkward situations and you should deal with it appropriately like everyone else. Certainly leaving early and not talking to the host during the meal isn't that polite.

2007-02-26 09:15:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Perhaps you could arrange a dinner out somewhere with the CEO, his wife with you and your husband.

I wouldn't appologize to him as you are not responsible for what other people say. Make no apology in the office on behalf of this oaf. If something is said to you, I would respond by saying that I don't know him well, and was very shocked.

However, I would say something to my friend about her new "love" and his rude behaviour.

Asking anyone, even a close friend how much they "make" is none of anyone's business and in very poor taste.

2007-02-26 09:08:55 · answer #3 · answered by Pacifica 6 · 0 0

In all honesty, if this dinner party happened less than a month ago, by all means write the letter and get it to this man ASAP. If he's old fashioned, he will appreciate the sentiment. I don't recommend re-opening and old wound after that length of time, but for some, it's never too late to apologize honey.

I'm sorry, I did not see the part of your question on what to write.

so here goes:

Dear Mr. So & So;

On behalf of (your husband's name) and myself, I want to apolgize for the rude and inappropriate behavior of one of my guests. (fill in the name if you feel it's necessary) I do not condone this type of behavior and I am so sorry that you were placed in an uncomfortable situation at what should have been an intimate occassion amongst friends. Again, I apologize for this and would whole heartedly like to make it up to you (and his spouse...if there is one) when it's most convenient for you.

Sincerely,

Your name.

2007-02-26 09:21:46 · answer #4 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0 1

I would definitely write an apology letter since it was YOUR friends boyfriend.
I would say that it was a treasure to have him at the party and then apologize for a certain someones impoliteness during the party. Tell him that you have heard the poor guy is struggling with some pretty serious mental health issues.
The CEO is more important then this other bozo. He threw you under the bus by offending someone that could potentially help your husbands career. Don't worry about his reputation. Obviously HE isn't.

2007-02-26 09:06:20 · answer #5 · answered by Chula 4 · 2 1

You are not responsible for your guest's rudeness. Just don't invite that person and the CEO to the same party again.

In fact, you might want to keep your social and professional circles separate from now on.

You could always say something to the CEO next time you see him. A letter, however, would be too much.

2007-02-26 09:02:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5 1

Although you have nothing to apologize for personally, I'd probably say something.

The fact that he is a CEO has nothing to do with manners. It's how you would expect to be treated.

Your letter could say something simple like, "I regret that the dinner conversation got a bit too involved in your personal matters. I hope that your evening wasn't ruined and that you will join us again. I will ensure that the next dinner will be wonderful."

Good luck.

2007-02-26 09:12:19 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 1 1

Let it go, sometimes a letter can dredge up old wounds and the CEO is not going to forget, let time erase it.

But in the future be very careful who is invited.

2007-02-26 14:14:40 · answer #8 · answered by mitchell2020 5 · 0 0

i wouldn't...don't turn it into a bigger deal than it is. . Just because it happened in your home does not make it your fault, and no harm was done. It's not like rude guest hit the guy, or grabbed his wife's @ss. In fact, it was more ignorance than rudeness, and was not meant to intentially offend anyone. Don't worry about it.

2007-02-26 09:56:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I would send a little note and say that you are unaware of what went on but that you wish to apologize for any ignorance shown by your guest.At the next party you will screen your guests guest better....Hope this helps....

2007-02-26 09:27:38 · answer #10 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0 0

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