I don't get along with them since i told them my brother
wayne weening sexually abused me repeatedly when i was
younger..
They blame me though wayne is 4 years older...
Anyhow i don't want to see them of go to dads funeral..
i know there will be trouble..but i'm not exactly sure if i should.
aargh now you now my dilemma ...any ideas?
2007-02-26 08:52:20 · 15 answers · asked by ozidash 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You have been abused enough. Go on with your life and dont look back. As long as you can live with yourself not going to the funeral, who are they to judge. You have one chance at life to be happy, do not let anyone make you do anything you dont want to do. Only God needs to know why your not at that funeral...and he does. God bless you.
2007-03-06 05:38:09 · answer #1 · answered by 3boys 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Going to the funeral is a personal thing! It can only be decided by you. When my grandfather passed away I attended the funeral for my mother and grandmothers sake only. In time you will have your own personal goodbye. It will take time especially if they were mean to you previously. Another thing to look for is that you will be more upset that you think you will be it is a very emotional thing when there is so much animosity between you two. If at all possible PLEASE visit him one last time to have some closure. It will probably be the hardest thing you will ever face but it will be worth it in the end and your conscious will be clear!
Hope it all works out for you!
2007-03-05 20:21:28 · answer #2 · answered by Kimnkicks mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry about your dad. This is about you not your family. Will you be at peace with yourself if you do not go? That is what counts. Can you speak with your dad and see him before he passes? The funeral is for the living not the dead. If you are at peace with your dad then you do not need to be at his funeral to grieve. I would look to have the least amount of stress at this time and dealing with a family who blames the victim (a child) who was sexually abused is not a family I would associate with or look to be around.
2007-03-06 10:08:50 · answer #3 · answered by Kat G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My Mother passed Christmas eve from Colon Cancer, and because of my sisters (3) and brother (1) feeling that I "Might" be a problem, they felt that I shouldn't be there. You see, I have C.O.P.D. and am dying. My wife of 48 years feels that they may be a " Problem ", but Jesus said Love them even when they don't Love you. For I always will. God Bless !!
2007-03-05 20:29:35 · answer #4 · answered by fuzzypetshop 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to go to the funeral for your fathers sake. You hold your head up high, you did the right thing. We dont get to chose our families and sometimes families make horrible mistakes. You did the right thing but telling what happened. Shame on them for not believing you. I am happy that you have the guts that you do. Good for you.
2007-02-26 21:12:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to hear your sad situation. You should go to the funeral he is still your father. Go with a trusted friend, or your boyfriend for emotional support. If you still haven't forgiven them, just do not start any arguments, or give in to any provocations for a fight. Pray that you may be given the grace to live with your family's misgivings, and for your peace of mind. Pray for your family that they may be more understanding of you. And most of all, pray for your father's soul.
2007-03-06 13:49:03 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do something you will regret the rest of your life.
First -- you need to see and talk to your Dad BEFORE he dies from cancer. You will never have another chance to make your peace with him, and you will regret it the rest of your life.
Second, not going to his funeral will hurt you more than it will the rest of your family.
Go. Be gracious, then be gone. Avoid confrontation or drama... it's a funeral.
2007-03-05 21:02:01 · answer #7 · answered by kelannde 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't want you to live with the thought, "If only I seen him before he died" or "Maybe I should have visited him". So my suggestion to you is go see your father, before he dies and let him know that your sorry for his illness, and you know that he's angry with you, but I did tell you the truth. But that's not why I came, I came to see you, Ask if you can do something for him. If he is still angry at least you know in your heart you tried. God be with you. Life is to short
2007-03-06 15:40:42 · answer #8 · answered by lennie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is last time for u to take your own decision. after all he is your father ,he must be loving u very much when u r small. so pls go don't Wait this time,time never comes.think positive way that u r not doing wrong thing in u r life, u r showing love for your father.
2007-03-06 13:08:14 · answer #9 · answered by sanskrutispatil 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try and iron things out between you and your dad. You don't want to have guilt feelings about not patching things up before he passes on. I have a feeling that is what you really want, and that is why your asking this question.
2007-03-06 15:27:33 · answer #10 · answered by michelebaruch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋