Who actually enjoys being a parent?

Question

Persuade me! Since I decided I wanted to have kids I have heard nothing but horror stories about episiotomies, postnatal depression, never sleeping again etc... But what I really want to know is what do you enjoy about having kids? Whats the best thing about it? Is there anyone out there who feels like it was the best thing they ever did? Did it strengthen anyones relationship in the end, or change it in a positive way? (Not that I think my own relationship needs improving I love it, him, sorry!)

Answer 1

Im 40 and had a baby last year.
Massive change to my life, all for the better, that smile she gives me in the morning when she wakes up melts my heart.
There is nothing like having a child.

Answer 2

I have 6 kids--had them the usual way, 1 at a time.
The first child drove me crazy. Some of the problem was my youth at the time (I was 21) and some was just that he was and is a difficult guy. He's 28 now, and still causes me grief and joy in equal amounts.
My second baby was large and weighed a lot, but he was such a love until I wanted to have babies forever.
Then I had 2 daughters 11 months apart. That was hard as far as no sleep, no time to shower, always smelling like breast milk and feeling like a zombie, but it was also so very wonderful! I had 2 tiny little girls, with ruffly dresses and all that, and 2 little boys who were the same as all little boys--rough and tumble and sweet as can be.
Then I got divorced and thought my world had come to an end. Single parenting is tough, but not nearly as tough as being in a bad marriage. If I had it to do over again, I would have only 2 kids, and have them by myself. Sadly, the men I maried were not ready to give 20 years or so of their lives to childrearing.
Fast forward to a few years later, I married again and now have 2 of the greatest little guys in the world. They are the joy of my old age(lol). I had one son when I was 38 and the other when I was 40. I'm divorced again, and having children has been the one constant in my life.
I have been raising kids my whole life-I also helped rear my sister, who is 11 years my junior, too. I wouldn't trade places with anyone in the world.
I also worked and had 3 different businesses of my own over the past 30 years.
You can be a Mom and be happy and successful at it if you are realistic, and know that you can "have it all", just not all at one time.
Good luck.

Answer 3

I had my daughter when I was 31 and had the most difficult 2 - 3 years ever. But now she's 8 and I am SO proud of the person she is growing to be. I have given up work recently (I had been part time) and will not be returning until she is grown. Although I won't be having any more children, having her is definitely the best thing I have and am likely to ever do in my life. But no, I'm afraid having children doesn't strengthen a relationship. If anything, it will test it to the limits, (beyond imagination, if you don't have children). A relationship NEEDS to be very strong before deciding on babies. Thankfully ours was strong enough and we now have the common bond of our daughter, which is something nobody could take away.

Answer 4

Me. I have a 12 week old son who is my life.

I didn't have any of the above problems mentioned in pregnancy or birth. I had a natural childbirth in a birth centre with no pain medication (yeah it hurt like hell but I coped. I've already forgotten the pain.), no tears, episiotomies, stitches etc. Those who've had bad births love to scare others but not everyone has a bad time.

The first few weeks were tough - you're tired, hormonal, feel like crapola and the baby won't let you sleep. But it only lasts a few weeks!!! My son started sleeping through the night at 10 weeks. He now has the same sleeping pattern as me.

I haven't had postnatal depression.

And when that gorgeous little lad smiles at me I feel tears in my eyes. He is my world and my life before he came into it now seems hollow and empty.

It has strenghthened my relationship with my partner immeasurably and we are so much closer than we ever were before.

Having a child was the best thing that has or ever will happen to me and I can't recommend it enough.

Answer 5

Having kids is sometimes hard work. I didn't particularly enjoy sleepless nights or temper tantrums or when children are ill when you go on holiday or when you can't get a babysitter and you so want to go out.Teenage moodiness is pretty bad aswell.

But I think anyone will tell you that the overwhelming love you have for your children and the pride you have in their achievements and the laughs and good times and the fun of being able to teach them things and play with them is worth it all.

Yes, it was the best thing I ever did and I'd do it all again if I wasn't getting so old!!

Answer 6

Well, I have a 21 month old and am pregnant again, so that tells you how I feel about having had a kid!
The relationship you have with a baby is so special, they are totally honest, so when you get that big smile you know they mean it. There is no doubt that they love you and when they are hurt or sick, your hug does actually make them feel better. That is such a great feeling.
You get to rediscover the world in teaching them about it and see how many beautiful and funny things there are in every day life. You get to play with Legos and Etch-a-Sketch again and find they are still as much fun as watching movies and other adult entertainment.
You find out about yourself, you see the mannerisms you never paid attention to when they copy them. You find out what is really important to you, what you will not comprimise on no matter how much the kid pushes you and what you have been doing just for appearance's sake.
You get to know your partner better too, you find out what is really important to them, what values and dreams they want to pass onto their kids. Your caring for your child will always unite you against the world. But there will be lots more to fight about, I would say my relationship with my husband has changed, but not gotten better or worse.

Answer 7

I have 2 great sons 11/8 I'd love more but keep getting disappointed . Having kids was the best thing to happen in my life.Watching that tiny bundle grow into a good decent human is a great experience and no 2 days are the same,first day at nursery when you almost get 2.5 hours to your self ,1 day st school 4 hours to your self full time school all day to your self ,they 're not babies for ever and it's the best experience you'll ever have.

Answer 8

i love being a mum. I love taking my little partner in crime everywhere with me. We talk to each other we sing songs together. we put music on turn the sound up and dance and sing together. She helps me get through the shopping by keeping me company. She smiles and makes my day, she laughs and makes me laugh. She learns new things and sounds all the time.

She is my soul mate aswell as my daughter. My 8 year old is the same and she always keeps my smiling in her own more grown up way's. The list goes on. What can i say it is what you make it.

Yes it could be tiring getting up in the night but it was nice to
imagine that it was just me and her and the whole of the rest of the world was asleep. Both of my babies slept from 6/7 weeks old so i was lucky.
it can be a rough ride but kids are fasinating and you will never be bored.
Its not always this lovely and some people have a hard time but you asked me and i love it.

Answer 9

The purpose of having children is instinctual, to procreate, carry on the species. It is the primary responsibility of the parents to raise their children to be contributing citizens to society and to prepare them for the life ahead of them, challenges, etc. Benefits of having children? Someone to wipe your butt when your old? Someone to bare grandchildren? Someone to take over the family business? Someone to carry on the family name? There are many reasons, each very personal. I enjoy the company of my children, most of the time. Everything that I may enjoy about my children is overshadowed by fear...fear for their safety, fear for their future, fear for their happiness. I can't say that it was the best thing I ever did. You have the children, you do the best you can in taking care of them, you try to have the best relationship you can with them, but in the end, you do your job and they go out on their own. Having children didn't strengthen my relationship. I think that children should be an enhancement to an already wonderful relationship. Children should not be the sole focus of your life or you will lose who you are. In my opinion, there are more negative things to having children than positive, only because you now have massive responsibilities, and with that comes tons of stress, worry and guilt. Your relationship will change with your husband. You will have less alone time together, you may have different parenting ideas, can you afford a child easily? If not, this added stress contributes to the downfall of a marriage. Obviously, it's your decision, take what we all say with a grain of salt. But if there is an overwhelming opinion in one direction, then you might ask yourself why. There is truth in what everyone says, because they say it with experience. Why do you want children? Simply to have a cute baby that looks like you and your hubby? Because the baby clothes are adorable? Because someone is pressuring you? Children do not ask to be created. I think that we do it for selfish reasons. Look at the world that your child would be born into....I love my children, having them has made me stronger, it's made me look deeper into myself, I want to be a good influence on them, so I think twice before doing something questionable.

Answer 10

When you give birth for the first time and that tiny face stares up at you, it is as if the world stops. The overwhelming surge of love and protectiveness washes over you, it was one of the most life changing moments of my life. While your child is an infant it is amazing to see those big innocent eyes stare up at you with so much trust and love. The first smile brought tears to my eyes. Hearing the word "momma" well, really more like "mum" is another choker. My son is a year and 1/2, and I love every moment (well, almost every) of it. It is the most rewarding and challenging job that I will ever have. You get over the pain, labor, sleepless nights, etc.. and don't really ever think of them again. I now know why Mother's would do it over and over again,,,, It is the greatest Joy in the world.

Answer 11

I have a 6 month old daughter. she wasn't planned, but I wouldn't change having her for anything in the world.
BUT being pregnant wasn't too enjoyable and neither was giving birth. Then you get the sleepless nights. but it all gets better. My daughter screamed non stop the first 2 month. but then she started sleeping through and it was great. eventually there's time to have a relationship again.
One of the best things to see is when they first smile or laugh, start to crawl and eventually walk (not quite there yet).
I almost cried when my daughter smiled the first time ;)