I like this girl but she wants me to tell her little about myself. What are the right things to tell her? I mean I don’t work I am disable… I don’t want to come right out and say “I don’t work… I am disabled.” Yet if she finds out that I didn’t tell her… she may get angry in the future?
2007-02-26 08:33:25 · 12 answers · asked by Daniel W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have to be honest with her. I don't care what someone does as long as they are honest. She would quickly disrespect you if you avoided telling her something that is a major part of what you are. Start off with telling her your attributes. What do you like to do? What are some of your hobbies? Tell her about how you grew up and about your family. If you were ever married, any children, etc...
When the right woman comes along, it will not matter that you are disabled. God will send you the woman who you are meant to be with and she will not care. You have to be honest. If she asks you where you work, you have to tell her. Or you can tell her before she asks.
I believe that honesty is best. If you don't tell her upfront, you are going to be anxious about it until you tell her and until you see how she reacts. You can tell her you are looking for friends first that have good possibilities of turning into a relationship down the road.
I have a friend who married a paraplegic. They dated for 3 years before they married. I have many friends who date disabled people. You have to have faith and give someone a chance to get to know you for who you are. Best wishes to you.
2007-02-26 08:42:49 · answer #1 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello,
Firstly honestly is the best policy.
How old are you both? If shes a decent girl then wether your disabled or not will make no difference to her. Its the person within you that she will see not the person on the outside. Tell her what sort of things you enjoy doing in your spare time, hobbies. Tell her any ambitions you have. What animals you like or have. Tell her about your personalitiy, what makes you happy. Do you like a girl who has a sence of humour. Favourite colour. You dont need to mention your disability straight away. Disabled comes in MANY MANY MANY FORMS. Rather than just telling her you disabled, actually tell her what your disablitiy is. Sometimes when people here this word they automatically think the worse case of disablitiy and im sure what ever yours is, it isnt that.
I would be honest with her from the start. Girls dont like being lied too (neither do guys) and i know you wont be lying, but your be with holding information from her which ofcourse is important information. Dont run yourself down thinking she wont like you because of this, coz IF she really does have a problem then hun she's doesnt even deserve your heart.
Hope this helps in some way even if its just a little
2007-02-26 08:44:15 · answer #2 · answered by Mystic Magic 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well...since when is the truth a bad thing?
If she runs away from you just because you are disabled and can't work, than why would you want to be with her anyhow?
Don't present yourself as someone you aren't. That's not fair to you or her. Be truthful, be honest and be open.
I assume this is an online relationship. A lot of people lie about who they are. Which really benefits no one. Again, be who you are and be honest.
2007-02-26 08:47:38 · answer #3 · answered by Barb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simply put, if she cannot understand that you are disabled and not able to gain financial security, it goes to show where her values are placed. Tell her straight up. Tell her you can't work due to a disability. If she knows about you, personality wise, and likes you, than she'll like you despite your problems.
If she doesn't, than she isn't deserving of you or your attention.
take care and
cheers
2007-02-26 08:39:43 · answer #4 · answered by H Vice 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well even if you don't want to tell her right away, i'd still mention it. start off telling her how you are, and what you like, etc. then slip it in there really quickly. say it in a nice, indirect way like "i am in between jobs" or something like that. if you don't work because youre disabled, tell her how you are disabled and how it happened, it'll be a sympathetic story to draw her in. and some women like that.
also, it's definitely a bad idea to wait till later. she might be offended and hurt if you don't tell her right off the bat.
2007-02-26 08:37:43 · answer #5 · answered by Chris C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's better to be honest. You may explain a little about your disability so she is more understanding.
2007-02-26 08:36:42 · answer #6 · answered by missyhardt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah even though you may think it's a turnoff to a lot of girls to say you don't work if you explain yourself she'll understand.
if you like her it will have to come up sometime so it's best to get it out in the open so you can enjoy your relationship.
2007-02-26 08:38:15 · answer #7 · answered by Kayla Arielle M. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think she needs to know.
Have you met her in person?
I don' t know... but I think it's definitely something that she should know... That doesn't mean she's just going to be evil and throw you away. I hope she likes you enough that she doesn't care that you don't work.
I hope it turns out well for you.
God bless!
2007-02-26 08:38:15 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ Cliff 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok so misrepresent yourself for rejection later..uh.... great plan?/not!
be upfront and deal with reality..why waist her or your time... if she is a good friend she will not care!!..
if she is like the other 98 % of the girls on earth..well then..
she will turn and walk away.. don't waist your time and cut to the chase!
2007-02-26 08:38:57 · answer #9 · answered by Derrick Zooolander 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is alway the best route!! If you are honest with her, and she doesn't like what she hears, guess what?? she's not for you. Someone else is waiting for you! Good luck!!
2007-02-26 08:37:34 · answer #10 · answered by dpricer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋