My BF hasn't worked in nearly 2 years because he's been playing final fantasy XI.?

Question

How can I tell him that its the game or me. Is it wrong for me to give the ultimatum? We lost our apartment and everything- back at our parent's houses because he wanted to play instead of work. I've tried telling him and he says it wrong to give the ultimatum. But isn't it just as wrong to not do anything besides play a game. I want a man who acts like a man, not a 10-year-old kid. He’s 24 years old!! What should I do?? All we ever do is argue about a stupid game. I lost everything I've worked for because of it and him. He said he had a shoulder injury from lifting ladders @ work. My family is all labor working men and none of them has hurt shoulders from lifting a ladder up every now and then. Is he BS'ing the shoulder thing? I've always thought it is BS. There are a lot of problems w/ our relationship and this game is one of the big ones. Should I just leave him? It’s hard to believe any words out of his mouth b'cuz actions are louder. He has an excuse for EVERYTHING

Answer 1

Your gut instincts are telling you loud and clear what to do. You dont need other people telling you. This guy will be nothing but problems for you your whole life. Youre not obligated to stay with him. YOURE NOT MARRIED. so run now while the running is easy. If you marry him knowing how he is then you wont be able to blame him, it will be your own fault. He doesnt seem to bright to me. Go find a man who can appreciate you.

Answer 2

Having a shoulder injury doesn't mean that you can't work at all. Obviously he can use a computer so he could get a job in an office somewhere. His injury needs to be verified by a doctor or orthopedist but still, it doesn't prevent him from working at some non-physical job. There are PLENTY of those out there.
He's young enough to go back to school to learn new skills and get a degree, even a two-year Associates. His excuses are just those, empty excuses.
On a more serious note, the world of psychology is realizing that video games (especially online ones) can be highly addictive, like drugs, alcohol or other things. He is most likely addicted to the game. He really needs professional help because without it he won't ever stop.
Would you leave him if he was an alcoholic or drug addict and the same problems were happening? Just replace "Final Fantasy XI" with alcohol or cocaine and think about it. He's not going to get any better unless he gets help.
You might want to consider an ultimatum: He MUST get help for his addiction, then figure out school or another job. If he doesn't do this or agree to do it, then you should probably break up with him because he's only going to get much, much worse.

Answer 3

Geez, and I thought I played too many video games. At least I put in a full day of work and pull in a pay check. Wow this guy is really hooked. Let's see. If you can erase his character then he will be so destroyed that he won't want to start over again. Make sure you have a long vacation planned in another state before you do this because he will probably get violent. Stay in telephone contact with him so he can yell and curse at you but not get his hands on you, and don't come back for at least a week.
You are going to have to ask another Yahoo question on exactly how to do this, because I'm not a player of final fantasy XI.
Of course you could always start dressing up in night club outfits and go out dancing with your girl friends. That may cause him to think twice about his on-line infatuation. If it doesn't, maybe you'll meet somebody new.

Answer 4

Honey DUMP HIM while you still have a teny weny bit of pride left hes totally BSimg the whole shoulder thing and even if he isnt the fact that he would actuul tell you it aint fair for you to give him an ultimatum is Bull i mean you lost everything i say get out and if you had any sense what so ever you would.

Answer 5

Don't give an ultimatum, find a real man with a real job.
This man-child is obviously a loser and will lead you through a life of misery, by the way, Final Fantasy XII is coming out soon, what do you think he will do.
Work at a job, or buy that one too and probably with your money!
Come to my site I find many good, honest men for FREE for women like you.

Answer 6

If you got a man that want nothing then you won't get no where you need to move on without him.Sometime you can do better with a man play game it may be something waiting on you but you not going to get it waiting on a guy that got excuses all the time.IT JOB OUT THERE THAT HE DON'T HAVE TO LIFT HEAVY LADDER. SO YOU NEED TO TELL HIM TO GET A JOB OR GET TO STEPPING.GOOD LUCK.

Answer 7

Dump him. Or try playing the game with him and see what's so great about it. Either way, did you every try just unplugging the game, sitting down, and talking to him? Plus, it's true that games [especially online ones] can be very addictive, and you might need to get him professional help.

Answer 8

As for his injury he needs to see a doctor and if it's legit and can't work he can get disability (income and he can sit on his rear and play games). If its your family he's living with tell him to go back home until he can help pay for his share. If you are living with his family - move out (stay with friends or family) and tell him to call when he grows up.

Answer 9

My tidbit of advice is this: If he's not bringing anything to the table to lift you up, then all he is doing is bringing you down. You can do that yourself, why keep the extra weight on your shoulders?

Answer 10

Umm, if you need us to answer this question, then you have some serious problems. The answer is right in front of your face. Leave his sorry mooching ***!!