4 year old eats REALLY slowly?

Question

My four year old daughter eats her meals unbelievably slowly, sometimes sitting with a mouthful in her mouth for ages and ages. She eats the meal eventually but yesterday it took her an hour to eat a slice of toast?
Its really frustrating cause you keep reminding her but nothing happens - any advice?

Answer 1

This approach is for when you have tried anything else, and it works for any toddlers and pre schoolers..

At 4 years old your daughter knows what you are telling her, I am assuming.

Tell your daughter, you have 20 minutes to eat. When the 20 minutes is done, take her food away. When she comes to you and says, "I am hungry", you say "How sad, You didn't eat when We had breakfast, now you have to wait until lunch to eat again".. I promise this will not happen more than a few times before she learns, but YOU have to be the strong one, and stick to your guns if you want things to work in your favor.

This is a Love and Logic approach. To learn more read

Love and Logic Early Childhood

Answer 2

My 3 year old does the same when he's feeding himself so I sometimes put the timer on and tell him he has 10 minutes to finish his sandwich etc then either the dog or the bin gets it. This worked for a while and used to freak him out a bit, now he's quite happy to give it to the dog!! He's quicker and eats more when I'm in a hurry and feed the kids myself (our daughter's 2) so they often get fed off the same spoon like a little production line! Also if he can't manage his main meals in reasonable time I quite often don't allow snacks or morning/afternoon tea so he's hungry at tea time. Good luck.

Answer 3

UGH my 3 year old did (and still does occasionally) the exact same thing... most meals take at least 45 min to an hour and a half... it's BEYOND frustrating, especially if you're at a restaurant!!!

My mother gave me this advice... for breakfast and lunch my daughter has a half hour time limit. If she does not finish, the food is taken away, and no snacks or treats inbetween meals, except for veggies or fruit ( "no, you cannot have a cookie since you didnt eat your lunch, BUUUT, you can have carrots!" lol I love it, I really do, like ha-ha you shoulda listened to mommy! :p). When dinner time rolls around she either eats it all in a normal time frame, or gets spunky and picks at her food. I do the same half hour time limit... but lately she seems to always eat her dinner because she loves to have a snack around bedtime, and she knows if she doesnt eat her dinner, no snack. Rarely since I started taking her food away has it taken her longer than a half hour to eat any meal.

My mom said to pick and choose the battles... now this is one less thing I have to get in my daughters face about... she doesnt eat, I take it away. No demanding/yelling/begging. Simple yes or no.

Answer 4

You just need to allow a set time, with a warning, and then take away the food. Seems mean, but she's old enough to get the idea. Choose a time that seems to suit your family and the meal, say 30 min. Then no snacks after. Don't worry, she won't starve. She will, however, be looking forward to the next meal, and if she dawdles again, it will happen all over again...

Answer 5

Hey at least she is eating. I wouldnt hassle her too much. Yes I know its annoying but if you make an issue out of food it can really cause problems for both of you.

It is frustrating being 4, she may see this as a way of controlling you, I mean they dont get to control much at that age do they.

Why not give her an idea of the things you can do with the time saved from not taking so long. For example...hey if you finish that up now we can go to the park/read a book/play a game..but if you take too long we wont have the time.

Hope that helps..best of luck x

Answer 6

I totally understand!! My 5 year old still does it. We dish his food out first now and let him start. We tell him whoever finishes 1st get to choose what we do for 1/2 and hour after dinner.
I works!! He has never moved so fast, he doesn't even question whats on his plate and he was once a very fussy eater.
Just rememeber that until they learn to tell the time, they have no concept of time so they wont understand what the rush is!! Try teaching your child o'clock and 1/2 past then you can show her how long she is actually taking to eat!!!

Answer 7

I have a two year old who does the same. I've not really found a way of getting round this other than making him drink his juice/water after a couple of spoons. He needs to swallow to be able to do drink this so it helps a bit but he still takes his time when chewing usually at meal times. If he is eating something sweet - raisins, cake or yoghurt, he eats this really fast though.

Answer 8

omg my son is the same....
he is 4 in may and takes so long to eat his dinner he can make me go crazy he starts full time school in Sept I'm scared he wont get to play out because he takes so long to eat, i now make him sit at the kitchen table turn the TV off and we set the timer on the cooker i give him 30 Min's if he has eaten his dinner by then he gets a treat. Anything like a piece of fruit cake sweets....
Good luck

Answer 9

Hi, my daughter is the same but has got a bit quicker since being in for school dinners - it is frustrating but telling them off just makes them resent eating and dreading dinner times - so perseverance is the key and lots and lots of patience.

Answer 10

i put my 5 year old "on the clock" give him a reasonable time to finish by and if he doesn't take something away that evening he enjoys like t.v. or coloring. sometimes I make him pay a quarter. he gets 3 dollars every week to make his bed and keep his room picked up. Still make them finish eating though. A few times of this, cured my kid's slow eating. Good luck!