My son shows signs of ADHD. How will this affect him when he is grown?

Question

Actually, I have never had him diagnosed but have been told by every adult that crosses his path to put him on meds for ADHD. I dont beleive in doing that because I love the way he is. He is fisty and hyper and full of energy and life. I wish I was more like that but he is almost too much for most people to handle. He can run circles around kids his age. People say he will be the next CEO, great actor, etc.........He is a bright kid but sometimes shows signs of disinterest and depression. His dad is the same way as him and got on drugs and has alot of other problems which is why we divorced. Are there any adult ADHD men that could give me advice on steering him in the right direction?

Answer 1

please forgive me if i sound callused but i truly believe that add adhd is COMPLETELY over-diagnosed these days. kids are kids... rambunctious, wild, creative, and FUN! i say let him be who he is for as long as possible. i got bored in school, still do, i had overwhelming energy until endometriosis. my mom once wondered if i had it, she took me to a doctor and please understand and listen to what he said. "exceptionally bright children will be bored, will be over excited at times, are more likely to suffer depression." to me, his problem is not a problem at all, he is smart. let him be. i have always been told i am too smart for my own good, maybe he is too. just please give him the right guidance, i know bright kids who get set in the wrong way of life because the right one wasnt interesting enough. i really believe that if you leave him be, off meds and everything else, he will be better off in the long run. just let him be himself.

Answer 2

To confirm a diagnosis of ones illness should be done by a professional. What if your son has another illness other than ADHD? Not to scare you but a friend for years was saying her son had some type of Attention Deficit Disorder - and like you - she never took him in for a professional diagnosis. Four months ago, at the age of 8 her son passed out on the play ground at school and was rushed to the hospital via ambulance. A tumor the size of a walnut was found behind his ear. The growth of the tumor was putting pressure on his brain. It was a 50/50 situation and he is still under observation.
Your role as a mother is to provide the doctor with the symptoms and have them professionally diagnose your son. Please don't over exaggerate his symptoms because as with any medication - there are side effects. Good Luck.
P/S - let your son enjoy his childhood - don't display so much of your drama in front of him.

Answer 3

I have a 14 year-old son who has ADHD. The hyper part does not bother me, like you I enjoy my son's personality. But, without his medication he is unable to concentrate in school. I only allow enough medication to help him concentrate, but not suppress his vibrant personality. You should also be aware, that ADHD should only be diagnosed by a professional and not opinionated adults. Before a child is medicated for ADHD the doctor must prove that the "Symptoms" effect the child's ability to concentrate and socialize at home, school, etc. If your child's "symptoms" do not effect his ability to learn and socialize than hyper or not he does not need medication. ADHD is more than just being hyper. I would have your child see a therapist to determine why your child is showing signs of "disinterest and depression."

Answer 4

I'm not an adult man with ADHD, but I have a younger brother with ADD.

For the first few years, my parents put him on meds because he had so much trouble focusing that he was doing poorly in school. As he got older, taking his medication became a hassle, he didn't like being on it, and the medication became a crutch for me and him for his bad behavior. He couldn't contain his energy and I would hate it because that meant he would do stupid stuff like screwing around when I'm driving, not listen to me when I was babysitting, antagonizing our other younger brother, and when he went off the medicine, I would say that he needs to go back on because he was driving me nuts. Also, when he acted up, he would say that it's because he forgot to take his medicine that day.

Putting your son on medication may or may not be the best thing for him. You can take the kind that builds up in his system so forgetting a day isn't a problem, or take a dosage that doesn't build up in your system, you take every day but it wears off after a while (depending on the dosage). If you don't want him on meds, it's extremely important to be firm and consistant with your discipline in order to teach him HOW to keep his ADHD under control.

I don't know as much about ADHD, but I noticed with my brother that as he got older, he calmed down quite a bit. So it could be that once he gets older, the hyperactivity will go away.


Also, have you considered that your son is bipolar? Depression isn't caused by ADD. It could be caused by social factors like, your son is being socially rejected because of his ADHD. It's actually very common. Kids with ADD have a harder time at school so kids think they're stupid, reject them because of it, plus if he's so hyper that other kids notice it, they might find him annoying.

Either way, go see a doctor about it.

Answer 5

Some important information on ADHD

ADHD is Highly Over diagnosed!!

Think about this fact:
After 20 minutes of inactivity one's brain quits learning effectively.

This makes sense when we look at kids who have to sit for at least an hour at a time (if not longer). They get agitated, move around, aren't able to focus. All these are symptoms of ADHD and yet can be explained simply by the fact I listed above.

Psychology website on ADHD, it's prevalance, and it's overdiagnosis.
psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2004/06/10/adhd-remains-overdiagnosed-overtreated/

Answer 6

Is he in kindergarten or above? My son was looked at by the school phychologist and between him, the teachers, and his family doctor they felt my son had ADHD. He is a little over a month into taking ADDERALL and he grades have skyrockted up. We are having difficulties with his appetite though, that is the only real side effect we are dealing with. Most schools now have a school phychologist on staff which I never knew...hope I helped.

Answer 7

we studded about the medicine name Ritalin can help him, and those people want to be in attention all the time, and need allot of care, easy to give up from the home work...
the effect in the future around 12-18 years it will be grow and he will have more trouble in listening and action to the teacher, he will get low great, not because he is not smart because he didn't listen, he need speical treatment, don't worry around 5-10% in the socity have this trouble, but not all the parents discorver it, it's better to discover it early better in the future, the teacher must understand that he have ADHD and the school too, to treat him in other way i mean in better way.. don't worry he will be better if u care about him this much... good for u... u are good mom... GOd bless

Answer 8

my step father of 34 acually had really bad adhd and hey got on drugs and overdosed when i was 8...but alot of actors and celberties are aDD ADHD...like will smith, bam magera, Robin Williams, Will Smith, dustin hoffman....alot of them, adderall is a really good medication..when i was on it i was the same BUT BETTER! because i could consentrate more and because your son is bright and creative, he might not be able to put his mind into action, on medication, he will be able to show his talents and his mind... having adhd it might hurt his grades in school...depends on how old he is. The medicine won't make him any differnt, just change his behavior.

Answer 9

Hi- you might want to try the self help video- BEING IN CONTROL: Natural solutions for ADHD , dyslexia, and test anxiety. The video is at Amazon.com by Jason Alster MSc. There are self relaxation exercises, exercises for improved concentration, relaxation games, and accelerated learning tips.

Answer 10

I'm an ADD female (sorry I don't know any ADHD men) and I prolly would have the hyper part down if I got more sleep (I've never gotten enough sleep my entire life but I was fidgety and would get spurts up until my partial hystorectomy, then the hyperactivity dissappeared). There’s two things that could be going on. You’re son has ADD/ADHD or he doesn’t and he’s bored with school. Lemme explain (and my apologies this is *so* long).

I showed signs of ADD in school when I was younger (I'm 32 now, but I was what they called a “daydreamer” because I couldn’t hold attention). I had most my trouble as I got higher in grades. Fifth grade - we had to learn multiplying decimals, and I even had a tutor that taught me everything (I was in a body cast from a surgery). I just *couldn't* *get it*. I almost had to repeat the entire grade but something clicked - to this day, I don't know what. In high school I was cleared to take a few AP courses, but nearly failed them when I took in class tests, despite showing that I clearly knew the information. It seemed my area of problem was always "testing" "testing" "testing". I even scored 800 on my SAT's off medication. I've always wanted to go back and try again (if you have ADD they used to give you an untimed test, nor sure anymore) and see what I number I could hit. Nevertheless, it closed off every college in the nation to me. (Which was fine, I wasn't ready for college at that time). I always have to go back over my work and double check it now or I end up failing or poor grades for silly and stupid mistakes (I have some dyslexia that seems to put a wrinkle in things too learning wise).

I can understand that you don't want to "dope" your son up. Myself, there are some medications (Ritalin) out there that when I take them I become irritable and snap at everything everyone says around me (ADD nearly broke up my now husband and I when we were dating. He’d never had to deal with someone moving in and out of his peripheral vision as he watched tv, and it drove him bonkers. But now, he *gets it* and we’ve been married ten years as of this October). But once switched to something else, it seemed my ADD was manageable. I could concentrate, I didn't fidget, and I could in sense "calm down". My work in school has improved. I'm 32 and returned to college to be a teacher, and my grades in math went from usual C's, to A's. I've been holding a 4.0 perfect score through a semester of classes (this from someone who graduated high school just barely holding a 3.0 abouts). What I've seen done a lot in the schools, is that an ADD child will only take their meds during school; at lunch or in the morning (or both sometimes), weekends and after school are medicine free. This way they stay the same person their parents love them for at home, but can concentrate at school.

Something else that could be an issue, he could be showing disinterest because he's bored. This was my husband's trouble in school (and still is, college doesn’t have any AP classes lol). He'd finish the work, and be bored the rest of class. So his "disinterest" was labeled as ADD. Same thing just happened to his baby sister now, though the school got smarter and decided to test her for AP (Advanced Placement) classes first before labeling it ADD. Turned out she was ready for these AP classes.

If you really want to know, try both routes. Ask the school administrators if you can have your son tested for AP classes, that you think his disinterest and depression might be because he's bored and before you have him tested for ADD, you'd like to try this route first. It can't hurt him either way to know if he's ready for AP classes or has ADD/ADHD.

It sounds like you have a wonderful son; I hope things work out for the best for you both. Good luck, I hope some of this helped a little. =)

Edit: I just saw someone mentioned adderall, and that was the medication that worked *really* well for me - before and after my hysterectomy to help me during school and afterwards (my husband can always tell when I miss a dose or two, which is my bad, I'm forgetful by nature). Anyways, I wanted to add this in because I could never remember the name of the medication that worked for me. Like I said, try the AP route, as someone else said, kids are going to be like this, especially the smartest ones. If he doesn't show that he's ready for more challenging classes and you *really* want to know if he has ADD/ADHD, instead, have him tested there too. It won't hurt him. Worst you'll be told is "yes he's got a super brain and we need to move him into AP classes" or "yes he has ADD/ADHD" - neither one is a death sentance for him and you *won't* come under CPS for child neglect for chosing to not place your son on ADD medication. CPS has bigger issues than someone who wants to keep their son the way he is.