When my boyfriend and I go out to eat, he always orders for me. Is that normal?

Question

After the waiter takes our drink order, my boyfriend will ask me what I am going to order. I tell him, but when the waiter returns my boyfriend orders for me. I asked him why he always does that, and he replied "I just do." Is this normal?

Answer 1

It's not "normal" in that the majority of guys don't do that. It depends on what you like. I usually have a special request or sometimes a question about a dish, so I like to speak for myself. Being very independent, I'd feel the guy was being controlling if he had to order for me. However, some women might see it as being sweet and caring. If you like it, then it's normal for you.

Answer 2

Actually, it is very polite and rather suave. The waiter will then know for sure who gets the check. But it also shows a guys gentlemanly qualities which some women erroneously label as the practices of a chauvinist pig. These women tend to eat from the trough and not the china.

Answer 3

Do you mean he orders something different than what you want, or do you mean he simply states what you told him you want to the waiter?

If he orders something totally different, the guy is a control freak. If he merely tells the waiter what you want, then I think someone must have taught him that this is gentlemanly behaviour, probably somewhat outdated, but refreshing nonetheless.

Answer 4

Next time when he askes you, just say that you don't know, and pretend to keep looking until the waiter gets there and then tell the waiter yourself what you want, maybe he'll get the idea.

Answer 5

He read it in a book somewhere or found it in one of his moms cosmo magazines thats now sitting there for bathroom reading so he thinks its what he's supposed to do.

Tell him you appreciate that he is trying to take care of you and understand his gesture and respect him for it. But you really would like to order for yourself. Is that the only thing he does or is there anything else? If thats the only thing, i'd say let it go cause eventually all the chivalrous stuff will wear off ;)

Answer 6

I see it as like opening a door, he's just trying to show that he wants to take care of you. Obviously if you're posting it on here then you may see some sort of problem with it, so if you do I say speak up. Say you appreciate it but... and give your reason. He should respect that.

Answer 7

If i pay I will chose on how much to spend. If he pays then he can order for me. But asking me and then going against my wishes i would find unacceptable so i would reply next time since you always order for me anyway please just do so with a sweet smile.

Answer 8

well to each it's own if this doesn't bother you then it's no big deal but if this doesn bother you then you need to ask him to stop. Some might take it as a polite thing to do and others might take it as a way of him showing dominance. So it's all up to you and how you feel about it!

Answer 9

I think it is normal. My husband does the very same thing and I enjoy it immensely. He's just trying to be a gentleman. Sounds like maybe you have a good one there.

Answer 10

Chivalry. That's how men used to treat women on a date. Now, it's not very normal. If it doesn't bother you, accept that he's being nice. He probably opens doors for you too, huh? Lucky girl!