When your lover starts getting mad over little things that used to not bother them...?

Question

...Does that necessarily mean that they are finished with you?
Lately my lady gets upset with me so quickly over little things.
Half of the time she gets upset, I don't even know what I've done.
She just starts clamming up, only to start bitching and even tantrum throwing.
It's gotten to the point that I'm afraid to be myself around her.
I love her dearly, but her new attitude has me wishing she would disappear.
I've tried to talk to her about it and reason with her; but it seems almost like she WANTS to be upset and doesn't want to calm down.
I hate drama queens.
She didn't used to be one.
Does this sound familiar to anyone?
Any ideas as to what's happening?
Should I just give up?-Or just give her space?

Answer 1

Something big must of happened that you thought was a little thing, or no big deal. And you blew it off. And to her it was something big. And since she didn't get the resolution she needed for that situation, she's turning everything into a big explosive issue. Until you figure out what it is that you blew off, and thought wasn't a big deal, and make it up to her, she will continue to be this way.

Answer 2

This happens to EVERYONE. Maybe not necessarily to this extreme, but the extreme is not what is bugging her, it is how she is reacting to it.

What you need to do is sit down and talk about it. Get to the bottom of what is REALLY bugging her. Odds are it isn't the little things. If talking to her isn't working, and you have already said it isn't, then it is time to go see a marriage counselor. That is your best bet. This is not JUST happening, but it is not necessarily your fault, either. The best way to identify the REAL problem in your marriage and come up with constructive strategies for fixing it is to go see a counselor. Tell your wife you know she is unhappy, and suggest going to see a marriage counselor with her. If she refuses to go, then go yourself.

The alternative to this is harsh.

In any case, you CAN work through this. Everyone goes through it to some extent. We get complacent, and the little things start to bug us, because we mistakenly think that there is greener grass on the other side of the hill. There isn't. Cultivate the love you have, and it will grow. Sometimes, however, you need a little help. Good luck!

Answer 3

Well, first off, how long have you guys been together? If its been a long time, that could just mean that she's getting comfortable with you and she feels like she can finally be expressive with you and show you how she really feels about things. The "honeymoon" period might be over for you both and the real relationship is starting to develop. This is where most people jump ship because the "puppy love" is over. If she is over you and wants out, she'll start doing alot more than get mad at you, she wont even want to be around you for long peroids of time or even want to talk with you, even on the phone. Instead of giving up, listen to her and talk about it, even if it makes you cringe. Us men forget really fast that we are jerks sometimes too. With all that being said, you must also ask yourself if she's worth it to you because relationships are no joke..well, at least the real ones. Hope it helps out!

Answer 4

That's a tough one. There could be any number of underlying causes to the changes in her. You don't mention how long you've been in the relationship or your ages. Mid to Late 40's, early menopause. Twenties/Thirties with or without children? Maybe she wants children or maybe she's overwhelmed if there are children. Maybe something physical, emotional, psychological? Maybe she should consider seeing her doctor about what's been going on.

The fact that she's unwilling to discuss things with you makes it very difficult for you.

What ever the cause, she needs to know you aren't happy with the way things are currently. There could be some small habit you have that she's let get her so frustrated that she doesn't even want to discuss it. I know I do many things that drive my husband nuts, but I'm more likely to try to change things if he talks to me about it instead of yelling and accusing me of being basically, "a pain in the butt".

Anyway, even if she becomes angry, try to hold your emotions in check and tell her firmly that if she wants the relationship saved you have to BOTH work on it and discuss it without anger and accusations.

If she wants to save the relationship and really loves you, she will realize that she is in danger of pushing you away.

Maybe both of you should make a list of what has been good and bad about the relationship lately and stick to the list during the discussion and agree to not leave the discussion in anger to at least resolve to work on things.

I know, easier said than done, but as they say, "nothing worth having is easy" or something like that :)

Good Luck to you both,
Karenpa

Answer 5

Its seems like something is going and triggering her behavior. Sometimes when think it happened over night, but it may have started a while back and he start noticing more when the behavior is more aggressive. You should be afraid to talk to your lady or to go home. Maybe she wants out of the relationships and does not want the guilt of being the one to do it, and is pushing you to do it,so she won't feel bad. You need to evaluate your relationship and not minimize what may have going on.

Answer 6

I would say that it depends on other things. Does she spend less time with you? Blow you off? A loss of interest in wanting to do things you used to do? Call or talk to you less or less affection? If so then that might be a key sign that they are wanting to move on. She might have other things going on in her life that are causing her to be irritable and/or stressed and taking things out on you.

If she is "bitchy" one minute and the next sweet or however she used to be, then I would think it might be mood swings. Bipolar, maybe. I wouldn't just end it. Write her a letter if you can't seem to talk to her and give her a little space. If it gets worse, then give her more space, because who wants to be in a relationship like that. Follow your heart.

Answer 7

well, i think there's something that she wants to talk to u, but she doesn't know how to. and perhaps also she wants ur attention more than ussual. girls like to treat romantic and special. but sometimes the boy doesn't get it and turns into some miss communication between both. and maybe there's also a small problem thats keep on goin between u, at first its not a big deal but it will keep on continuing into bigger issue. and the last thing that worse is perhaps she met another man that treats her/ understand her better than u. and she started to compare it to u. and there also a jealousy inside it. maybe u need to spend more qualities time with her. a good communication is a right madicine for a relationship. gud luck.

Answer 8

Well it probably means that she is tired with you. I did the same thing, I just didn't know how to tell him and it seemed like every little thing he did made me mad or annoyed and maybe it's the same thing for her. Sit her down and ask her. Not that it's you personally, just try giving her some space too, that would probably help alot.

Answer 9

when she gets annoyed over something, just say a joke to her like "ohhh stop being grumpy ya chicken nibblet"

then wait for her reaction, which shouldn't be as bad now, then go over to her and give her a hug and say - "everything is going to be alright" explain that theres nothing to worry about. Stuff like that. Make her feel your love you obviously feel for her. This might change her attitude.

Hope this helps...

Answer 10

Maybe something happen with her, why you not ask her whats the problem? Or maybe she just find the way to break up with you, because some reasons.