Why aren't people willing to help me convert to Judaism?

Question

I have thought long and hard about converting and its something that I want to do. I know what a huge change and commitment it is. And that's what I want. But no one seems to want to help me convert. I don't think they understand my reasons for doing it which are simple to me. I just had my first child and I want to raise him as a Jew because I wasn't given much of a spiritual or cultural identity growing up because my mother was adopted and not very religious. I want him to have the familiarity of traditions and the comfort of an extended spiritual family and after studying many faiths and philosophies (even years before his birth) Judaism is what I connect with most.

Is that not a valid reason? And who says what is a good reason? This is what I want. Why are they rejecting me? Do I need to be marrying a Jew to have a "valid" reason to convert? And what makes that better, it only seem forced to me? This is what I actually WANT to do.

This question does sound angry and demanding. I didn't intend that a all. I am genuinely asking. I don't understand, that's all. And I'm asking out of the sincere desire to know if it is wrong of me to even ask for this or if it is who I am contacting or what.

Answer 1

I guess the thing is that Jews don't go out seeking people to convert. We're a culture as much as a religion, and one that you generally have to be born into to understand or want to be a part of. I remember when my uncle married a non-jew, she had to fight really hard to convince his temple that she wanted to convert not just because she was marrying one, but because she connected to the religion.

I agree, find a Reform temple (though it's easy for me to say that since I'm a Reform Jew). I believe they're much more open to conversion, and additionally, it'll ease you into the religion. If, at another time, you feel that you want to eat kosher and wear a kippah all the time and participate in other orthodox practices, then you can explore that from a more comfortable vantage point, after easing yourself into the culture and religion.

The thing is that Jews have a lot of cultural cohesion, and saying, "okay, you're in" to everyone who thinks it's the fashionable thing to do would dilute that. We don't want people popping into and out of our religion. People also don't seem to understand that anti-semitism really does exist, and it's obnoxious and offensive to deal with--be prepared to have friends tell you you're going to hell because you don't know Jesus. Be prepared to have people blame you for killing Jesus. It's happened to me two or three times, but I know people for whom it happens much more often.

You can convert if you want to and are committed to it, and you sound like that kind of person. Good luck in your endeavor... I have always loved my Jewish community and practices, and I've always connected more to it than any other religion, as well. It seems more logical and practical and earthy than Christianity, to me. Luckily, I was born into it, so I had that head start.

Answer 2

I think you'll find that the Reform branch of Judaism will be more hospitable to your conversion intentions than other branches so it might be the particular temple you are approaching.
If your town has a college or university, there might be a Hillel organization there you can join. They often have classes like, Intro to Judaism and open Seders and such. You can use these as a springboard to meeting other women there.
I can't speak as a Jew, but I did consider conversion myself and went thru these paths. I met some wonderful open people who welcomed my interest. Conversion is considered a serious and sacred act in this faith and I think they really want to know that you are serious and committed to this and that is why it is not a cake-walk. Jews don't go door to door, you might notice.
Don't lose faith, just keep learning and studying and try these ideas to get more involved if you aren't already.
I wish you a successful spiritual journey.

No, you don't sound angry or demanding, just honestly confused at reactions. . and don't listen to hate boy and that mommy chick, your path is your's to decide and you will be welcomed - it's a wonderful faith and has wonderful traditions,and welcomes deep questions like few other faiths.

Answer 3

I haven't done what you are trying to do, but I think the people you are talking to might be as confused as I am about your line of thought.

It would be God's decision to accept you, not some group of people. It would be your decision to believe or not.

You might have better success by studying scripture and then asking specific questions for which the Jewish people you know might have answers. For example, you might ask why it was important for Noah to have a pure blood line (perfect in his generations).

Answer 4

Quite the contrary. Often, if the only reason one wants to become Jewish is to marry a Jew, that will not be regarded as a sufficient reason for conversion.

You need to find an Orthodox rabbi who can guide you in your quest, and you must convince him of your sincerity.

You may understand the situation more clearly by referring to http://www.chabad.org/library/article.asp?AID=248165

And don't be surprised if you have anti-Semites here responding to your question in a hateful manner. They should be ignored.

Answer 5

What do you want us to do? I might have a wand but I don't think I can wave it and make you a Jew. Try going to a temple and asking for help. Tell them that you feel God pulling you to temple and want to learn. Don't go running in there expecting them to baptize you and make you Jewish (that's a Christian thing). Judaism does not proselytize and doesn't care if you are Jewish or not. You can study on your own and if you can't find somone to talk to, find another temple or synagogue.

Answer 6

Do you realize how selfish you sound? You are all but demanding that you get your way for little better reason than it's what you want. Did you consider for a moment that perhaps the Jews don't WANT you?

Answer 7

what you desire is a good thing. And God will honor that desire if you seek with all your heart.
try consulting a Jewish rabbi--he should be able to help you.
or Jewish friends who practice their faith.
We can connect to God more if we are rooted in our faith in Him.

Answer 8

Because it is not the way God established in his new covenant. Christianity is the way God established for us to serve him in the new promise. Judaism was the way then, but God changed it and said you have to worship him through his Son Jesus Christ now. Why do things that God no longer recognizes.

Answer 9

many people have control issues and if you seek what is not understood by them they feel out of place.go for your dream !forget what others think