Is he being honest with what he's telling me?

Question

So my best friend and i have been friends for about 2-3 years now and we've just discovered that we're falling for each other. Turns out he's had a secret thing for me since i've met him. Turns out we both have so much on our plate right now - a relationship is not on our priority list -we both want to finish and get our degree, there's financial issues - it's just not a good time. He finally talked to me and said that he never ever wants to hurt me...and that right now is not a good time for both of us. He said that if we were to ever go out, it would be a real relationship "worth it, lasting, long and serious" - rather than right now or a "2 second thing". We're still going to remain friends, for sure. I feel like he thinks he's the bad guy because he had to initiate it and the only way he's going to keep me "forever" is that we still remain best friends now until the time is right. It's hard for me to believe because guys in the past gave me alot of BS - Is he being sincere?

i don't know why but i'm taking it harder than i thought i would - i'm just sooo worried to what's goin to happen to us - i know everything will be fine (it will) but i just never want to lose him...and i know he still feels the same about me...

Answer 1

You guys could consider jumping into bed now and then just to confirm it's worth waiting for each other. ;)

Also, it sounds like one or both of you has a history that makes you think relationships are full of hard-to-avoid booby traps. You should make sure that you each understand the other one's feelings about that.

More generally, I don't see why waiting entirely for a relationship would be better than having a low key one. You can just make a pact not to be very demanding of each other until some distant date. It sounds like you two need to do more talking.

Answer 2

yep

booma boom