I love my mom very much and she was a great mom. I have issues with her seeing my 17 month old. I don't care if my dad see's her or holds her but when my mom gets close to her there is somthing in me that makes me jealous. It really hurts my mom but I can't stop myself. I don't like it that my daughter responds to my mom as much as she responds to me. I don't let my mom see her that much cause I don't want my daughter to respond to her. HELP
2007-02-25 14:37:58 · 7 answers · asked by Tammy E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm sure that your child will still come to you for help when she needs it when shes older it's not like she's not going to if her mom holds her I mean you are her mother and that's your decision about who holds her and who doesn't but I'm just saying your daughter will still come to you for help
2007-02-25 14:41:36 · answer #1 · answered by baby 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you are being selfish and overreacting with the way your mom is showing her love to your daughter. If you say that your mom was a good mom, then why are you so jealous? You ought to be thankful that your daughter has this close relationship with her grandmother. Not very many children are fortunate to have this bond. Stop thinking about yourself, it is not fair to your mother or your daughter for your behavior. I really think that you need to apologize to your mother for being disrespectful to her. And start acting like an adult mother to your child.
2007-02-25 22:45:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sometimes happens with the first child. You need to deal with your "first-time-mom" insecurities. You are the child's mother and that is a position that no one else can fill - - - -not even grandma. Grandmas have their special place too - - - which basically means they get to enjoy the grandkids and spoil them for awhile and then hand them back to their mothers. You are hurting your mom very much by not allowing her to see your child very often. What if your mom suddenly died??? Think about that for a minute. Wouldn't you want your mom and your child to have established a great relationship? We aren't promised tomorrow, so please try to realize that you both can hold a special place in the child's heart.
2007-02-25 23:31:49 · answer #3 · answered by TPhi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are dealing with a lot of new mom insecurities right now - topped off with a large helping of not getting enough sleep.
If you know that your mom was a great mom and is a great grandma, please let her be a grandma to your child. You know, no one will ever take your place in your child's life. It is important for your child to have relationships with other adults (esp. grandparents). In fact, it is very healthy.
You need to push your jealousy aside and let this healthy bonding begin.
Please know I have my in-laws who live next door and I am so happy when my 3 daughters can go over their and have fun. I do know that it is helping them become more well rounded people. It is also beneficial to them, because they know that they are loved by many people in their lives. My oldest is now in Kindergarten and I see a very positive, self-possessed confident child. I really honestly think a huge part of this has to do with her grandparents and her babysitter (who did so much with her while my husband and I were working).
Best wishes and take care,
debm
PS: It really does take a village to raise our kids. As Americans, we want to be too self-reliant. Please open your heart and mind to your mom. She may be a great role model and ally for you in the years to come, if you let her be close now.
2007-02-25 22:49:22 · answer #4 · answered by dam_9191 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grandmas are fun and she probably responds to her so well because she reminds your daughter of you (like that or not LOL) Dont be jealous, having 2 female role models for your daughter is a blessing and the relationship should be encouraged you daughter will benefit from it so much more.
2007-02-25 22:42:13 · answer #5 · answered by fyrechick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, it's normal for a toddler to get close to the one who take care of him/her. Imagine if your daughter is taken good care by a baby-sitter instead of your mum, will you feel better to see your daughter gets closer to the baby-sitter? She's your mum after all.
Furthermore, your daughter might not really understand what "papa", "mama", grandmum" mean. Till she's 3-4 years old, she will get closer to the parents instead.
2007-02-25 22:44:55 · answer #6 · answered by Fish Master 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to grow the heck up. it isnt a contest for affection. it is the fact that your daughter has loving grandparents, but you are trying to turn it into a popularity contest that you MUST win.
2007-02-25 22:42:29 · answer #7 · answered by Shredded Cottage Cheese 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋