How do you learn to trust yourself?

Question

ok so i am still deeply in love w/ my ex bf and he knows it.
We broke up 6 months ago and i still havnt moved on an I need to.
So i decided that if James and I arent togehter or trying to wrk through our diffrences, then I dont want to 2 b friends w. him.
So i told him that and he said- give me 1 more week and we're going 2 sit down and have a serious talk about everything.
Well gave him the week and the talk never happened.

But we were talking a couple nights ago and i told him once again that I cldnt go on doing this. He then admitted to still having feelings 4 me, but he still loves his ex gf, whom he was in a long distnace realationship with.

He then told me that he cant get into anything until he can learn to trust himself. Wether its w/ me or w/ her.


So my ? is, how can he do that?

Answer 1

He is being fair by telling you he still has feelings for his ex, and you should take that statement seriously. Would you really want to be with him knowing that his emotions are mixed and that he still longs for someone else? That isn't fair to either of you. I think you need to step back and take a good long look at this relationship, from the beginning till the end, and truly believe what this man is telling you. You are lucky he is willing to admit what his feelings really are, but until he is sure that he is over his ex, you two should stay away from eachother entirely, no phone calls, no nothing. When he is ready, he will call if his interest is with you. Until or if that happens, you need to make a life of your own, and stop depending on a man to "complete" you, the men I know don't want someone that is clinging on and not moving forward with their own goals. The men I know, like a woman that is independent and not needy.

Answer 2

he has to want to do it as bad as you want him to do it