Best age to have a child....for women?

Question

The doctor always says to have children in your 20's. Is this true what if your not ready. Do any women ever feel pressure by the medical society to hurry up and have a baby....so you wont have problems. Whos to say you wont have problems in your 20. Im 25 and im just curious how do other women feel about this....

Has anybody waited to long and was not able to conceive?

Answer 1

that's the paradox. Physically, yes, you're better off having a child in your twenties, really, your EARLY twenties if we're telling the truth. But emotionally and socially, there is the pressure to be secure in your education, your relationship, and your career before even thinking about having kids, and most women don't get to that point before their thirties.

So I think that women need to do what's best for them, while at the same time being aware of the fact that waiting too long can cause difficulty in conceiving and also increases the chance of problems with health of the child. And that sometimes too late really is TOO late, meaning no child at all.

Answer 2

Well, I guess you could call me a test case for this theory. I have three kids. Oldest was born when I was 17, nothing unusual about the pregnancy or labor/delivery. Middle kid was born when I was 24, and I almost died due to a spontaneous uterine rupture. Baby had kicked her way THROUGH the wall of the uterus, and if it wasn't for the great doctors, I would have died (and baby, too) - I started hemohragging on the delivery table, and they did an emergency c-section right there. My third (and last) baby was born when I was 35. They did all the appropriate testing for down's and such, and it was the BEST pregnancy and L/D of the three. It was a "scheduled" c-section, I was admitted at 7am on the 'chosen' day and baby Michael was born at 9:29 am. I felt so good afterwards that I was even discharged early - doctors usually keep c-section patients for 72 hours, and I was allowed to go home after 36 hours.

I'd say if you're not ready, so be it. There's NO "rush".

Best of luck to you!
Harleygirl

Answer 3

My husband and I have 3 boys and Im pregnant with our 4th. The first one was born when I was 20 ( Easy pregnancy) The second was when I was 23, also easy, and the 3rd was born at 27. I had a difficult time with the 3rd one. I had him at 34 weeks. Now Im 30 and having the worst pregnancy of my life. Its been terrible since I was 6 weeks.Morning sickness until I was 21 weeks, and then started again at 30 weeks. Put into the hospital for preterm labor, have to be on medicine to stop the contractions, and many other miserable things. I honestly would recommend having children in your 20s. My friend had the same difficulty as me. We joked about how we were too old now to be pregnant! Its alot harder than when your 20.

Answer 4

I got married at 22, had baby #1 at 26, baby #2 at 28. I just wanted to have kids before I was 30. By the way, I also have both a B.S. and an M.S. I didn't want to get so wrapped up in a career that I got to the point that I would have to go through a lot of problems to get pregnant. My education will always be there, and I can watch my kids grow up and then have a full time career by the time I'm 40.

Answer 5

I am a mother of five and started having my first one at 29. It was a good age for me but I don't think I would have wanted to wait too much longer. Physically it is hard work having a baby and being younger would be ideal. However you have to consider other reasons such as whether you are married, financially able to support a child and whether you have done the things you want to in the areas of education/travel/career etc.

Biologically the ideal age is in your twenties and studies have shown that children are better off when born to younger mums. That is not to say that a mother in her 30's and 40s who has looked after herself nutritionally and physically cannot mother healthy children - of course they can, but it is better biologically to be younger according to studies.
Also there is the fertility drop at aged 35 where women are less likely to fall pregnant after this age, not to mention higher incidences of down syndrome and other disabilities.

I think the important thing though is making sure you make a decision that is informed and planned so that this precious little baby that you bring into the world has got a loving and caring home to come into and the financial means to sustain it.

Hoover

Answer 6

For a woman, having children in their 20's is advised because it decreases health risks for both the mother and the baby. Technically speaking, if a woman is over the age of 35, or a man is over 40, there may be a bit of a concern. Not to say that you can't have a perfectly healthy baby after these ages, but the risk does go up. Couples are advised to seek the help of genetic counselors for several reasons. Many times people who are in the category of having children after these ages are encouraged to do so.

If you're interested in ever having children, whether it be now or in the future, it might be a good idea for you as well. It'll let you know what to prepare for as well as what risks there may be.

Answer 7

I think there is a lot of societal pressure to have children, no matter what your age. If it's not something that you want, then you need to be okay with that decision. I firmly believe you should be completely stable in all aspects of life before you bring another human into the world. That can be at 25, or 35, or 45. Or, you can never be ready. There's nothing wrong with being childless or childfree, no matter what anyone says.

Answer 8

I'm 20 and I feel no need to have a child yet. I'm in a long term relationship though. I want to have my first child at 28 because that's how old my dad was when I was born. :)

I want my college completed, my career well no it's way- I want to own very successful day cares :)

Also even still I may not have children just because I'd be around them all day. I love children but I'm still not sure if it's for me! It's way different when they're someone elses.

Answer 9

I had my son at 19, but I was married, my husband is older and we were both ready. The best time to have a baby is when you are married, and are both ready, emotionally and financially. Women feel pressure when they approach 35 or so because they know it's harder physically and their "eggs are getting old". I don't think a woman should get pregnant just because she thinks she's getting older.

Answer 10

I know lots of women that have their children in their 30s, but they consider after 35 a risk for Downs syndrome. I am 22 and am pregnant with my first child. I wanted to have a child, I felt I really needed to be a mother. It up to you if you want to wait, but I wouldn 't wait for 35 to roll around just because of the risk to the baby.