She dated him just before my girlfriend and I got together. She told me they didn't have a sexual relationship but later admitted they did have a sexual relationship after all. They have some things in common such as anime that her and I don't share. She wants to remain friends with him(In fact she wants to go see the Ninja turtles movie with him) but I don't feel totally comfortable with that. The fact that she lied in the beginning makes me feel this way. If she told the truth, I'm sure I wouldn't feel this way. My concern is, I don't want her to lose a good friend over this, If in fact thats all it is at this point. Should I trust her and let her see him on a friendship basis or not? Please give me some good honest advice. Thanks
2007-02-25 10:42:17 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do plan on marrying her. I think she made a mistake by lying nut I don't think she wants to lose me.
2007-02-25 18:10:43 · update #1
Telling her she's not "allowed" to be friends with this guy...what will that accomplish? Make her laugh at your caveman approach and break things off with you? Or agree with you...and just not tell you when she hangs out with him?
I'd be honest with her about your concerns, and ask her what she'd do in such a situation. Her answer might give you some idea whether she's worth keeping.
Good luck.
2007-03-05 10:31:26 · answer #1 · answered by tantrickster 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly it seems like that your girlfriend has some sort of attachment to her ex. By just lying to you she felt like she had to hide the fact that she had sexual relations to the guy.
You have to ask her seriously how much of friends are they.
If you trust her then let her go but state to her your concern.
About her lying to you from the beginning. Starting off a relationship lying is not a good start at all. Actually go on a double date with the guys g/f. See how they act and look at each other. Then you could make your decision on that.
2007-02-25 10:49:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i can see why your concerned. Maybe she could hang out with him on a friend basis if you were with her when they hung out you know? Like maybe even try a double date or something some time if you can find some one for him unless he has a new girl or something. I mean you don't want to seem too hasty cause then your girl will think you don't trust her but at the same time she did lie to you so you have your reasons. I would try talking to your girl if this issue really upsets you and explain your feelings and concerns regarding her chillen with this guy. Make her understand why you feel the way you do with out making it seem as though you have no faith in her. Do what your instincts and heart tell you to do and you will be fine. Good luck!
2007-02-25 10:49:27 · answer #3 · answered by poetryprincess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not let that girl play you! You seem really compassionate and understanding in fact just for her lying and still contacting the ex she has no feelings for is a lie why else would they engage in a movie without you. Seriously, thats not the one for you, not on those pretenses. What makes you think they have a totally platonic relationship? I wouldn't trust any woman who lied about sex and still contacting the person...what value are you to her and if she can't respect your desires then move alone. I much rather be alone than with a man who doesn't value my opinion.
Move on to another WOMAN, not a undercover skeez bucket! : ) Did you meet the guy?
2007-02-25 10:49:55 · answer #4 · answered by Diva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but if she had a sexual relationship with him they are not going to be just friends you can trust and believe that. If you let her go to the movies with him and continue to be friends with him you are basically telling her good ahead and sleep with him I don't care. Cause that is what is going to happen.
Chances are if you tell her that you don't want her to be friends with him she will probably end up breaking up with you and hanging out with him anyway.
You just need to find yourself another girlfriend cause if the shoe was on the other foot do you think that she would take things the way you are..... I don't think so!!!!
2007-02-25 10:51:47 · answer #5 · answered by luscious0071 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is what you should do since you think she might lie again to you just let her go to the movies and you go to the movies to but make sure you get there way before she does so that you can spy on her. I know that thats not a good idea but if you still believe she is still lieing to you thats what I would do, cause I have done it before and believe me it helps.
2007-02-25 10:52:29 · answer #6 · answered by lisaapankme26 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in one tough position.
I wouldn't advise you to be 100 % cool with this. If they are going to the movies together and she already lied to you once then there might be a few feelings she still has tucked away. She can be friends with him, but they don't need to hang out like best buds. Tell her. don't put your foot down until she understands how you feel. you shouldn't compromise your gut feelings. But from a woman's view, if I had sex with someone then that means i had an emotional attachment. Emotions are bad for friends!
2007-02-25 10:49:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No the bible would not say christians you're to have open minds. it could't be approximately going to church. Are you a christian? in case you have reported which you're an atheist than it could't be that she hates you, yet that she needs to guard her son. easy has no employer with darkness. you may desire to love absolutely everyone, yet that does no longer advise you may desire to hold close out with them. How do you be responsive to this is approximately going to church? choose some extra information. precise they could desire to invite you to pass with them. do no longer forsake the amassing. undergo in strategies too that no longer absolutely everyone who say or perhaps thinks they seem to be a Christian are one. some human beings be responsive to approximately them of their head, yet no longer of their heart. She could in basic terms have self assurance.
2016-10-01 23:48:12 · answer #8 · answered by carlstrom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wold int let her!! if she has lied before she will probly lie agen!
may be take some time off from the relationship and c if she gos for him right away, if she dos she is int worth missing with!!
2007-02-25 10:49:53 · answer #9 · answered by xbmc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's her choice. Next time don't give her any advise because she don't listen. Let her live her own stupid desicions.When she lose freinds she will get a clue about her choices.
2007-02-25 10:46:48 · answer #10 · answered by LIZA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋