our pastor has told us to use spanking on our children, what should we do?

Question

we are parents of 2 children age 5 and 3 and living in germany . we are members of a free church since last september. we are realy happy in the church community and the spirit is great there but i dont agree with the spanking subject. is it realy true that the bible is telling us to this? the pastor told me and my wife to use as rod to spank our children. he showed us the bible parts who are telling it and said that it is gods way to do it. is this the truth?

Answer 1

Spanking is fine as long as it's done as an appropriate punishment rather than as an outlet for your anger. Children need discipline or they will grow up as spoiled brats. Many children and teenagers today have no respect for adults at all, and it's because they've been allowed to get away with everything and have never feared the consequences. Smacking is one of the ways to avoid a child growing up like that.

Answer 2

I think you have to look at the context of that passage. The Bible actually doesn't say anywhere to "spare the rod and spoil the child." The reference to a rod has to do with slaves back in old testament times.

However, the Bible does tell us a couple of things. First it tells us to train a child up in the way he should go and all his days he will not depart. Second, it tells us that we should be talking about God's laws in our homes at all times. When we lie down, when we eat, when we sit, and so on.

My personal opinion is that if you are opposed to spanking, then don't do it. However, not spanking does not mean no discipline. Have you ever met someone who doesn't discipline their children? It is unpleasant for anyone who comes into contact with that family. We don't spank our girls, not because we are opposed to an open-handed smack on the bottom (please do not confuse the issue by throwing in abusing a child), but because w have found other things are just as effective, such as taking away privileges or time outs. Even more effective is positive reinforcement for good behavoir. It's all a balance.

We home school our girls and they are both wonderful children (13 and 10 now). I don't want to tell you to go against your pastor, but even a pastor can be wrong. If you are unsure, go to the Word. The Bible is the final authority.

Also, I think you should go speak with him about this issue. it may be that you have misunderstood what he was saying. If not, then you'll have a chance to present your viewpoint and discuss it with him. Good luck!

Answer 3

i think of a extra effective question is why is it ok for some mum and dad to triumph over the crap out of their teenagers and phone it self-discipline? self-discipline, whilst used wisely, if very effective. i comprehend toddlers are very difficult. yet spanking a newborn wherein bruise dermis is a result's ineffective. This in basic terms shows the newborn that that's ok for somebody older to triumph over up on him. attempt making use of a manner that suits the crime. as an occasion, in the adventure that your newborn isn't listening to you because of the fact he's watching television what would you do? i'd punish the newborn from watching the television. Afterall, the television is what brought about your son to end listening to you. i don't think of goverments could have the splendid to tell every person who to advance their newborn. yet in at present's society, goverment is the only help that an abused newborn would get. i think of at some point, people who think of roughly having toddlers could certainly be required to pass to college, no remember how previous the mummy is. some human beings do exactly not understand the thank you to deal with their temper and it gets 10 circumstances extra good once you're continuously telling your newborn returned and returned what should be completed!

Answer 4

"Spare the rod, spoil the child." This is really in the Bible. You don't have to interpret it to mean literal beating with a rod. The point is that you must discipline your child or they will never learn. If you do not agree with spanking, then don't spank your children.

Answer 5

I do agree with punishment, but I believe spankings should be used only as a last resort and, at that age, I don't think they're ready for a spanking. If they persistently do something knowing you told them not to, then a spanking, not a beating like many parents think, would be suitable.

Best of luck and may you and your kids futures be bright!

Answer 6

Christians who maintain that spanking is manditory discipline for children are applying a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting which is in contradiction to Proverbs 22:6. In this passage, the original text indicates that we are to parent children according to their God-given inborn design. We are to respect their individual differences and train them accordingly.

Spanking is not necessary or desirable in most cases where discipline is required, and is certainly not manditory to good Christian parenting.

God doesn't actually beat us up with a whip; he does use the circumstances of our lives to discipline us. This is what he expects us to do with our children as well.

There are many creative and effective ways of guiding children toward right behavior without using spanking or any other form of discipline that would hurt them.

Answer 7

(That's nuts!!) Yes, it is in a sense. The Old Testament says if you spare the rod you spoil the child. That's why I stay away from churches and organized religion. You raise your children as you see fit and fair. That pastor has no business in your personal life. He is just another man. God gave you a mind and a heart for your child!! @8-)

Answer 8

a rod?? my parents used time-outs and lectures, and our paster has never said anything on spankings other than it's the parents' choice. your kids are yours to raise in the best way you see possible. although i'm heavy on obeying the preacher, that has never been an issue in America where some parents use different methods, never has anyone tried to find places in the Bible telling us to or not to.

Answer 9

looking back on my own childhood , being from the generation that spanked , and i don't think my spanking parent was trying to be cruel , but i have never forgotten or-forgiven the pain and embarrassment of these events, it made me be in harms way many times as i was to afraid to tell my mother anything that was going on in my life, and that included sexual abuse that went on for many years ,because i was afraid of my mother and that I would get a spanking all we have to show is love to young minds, that will do sometimes things that we are wanting to strike out , don't its not worth the pain you can cause to a young child . in their heart and in return to your own heart would you like someone to hit you if you as an adult did something that displeased someone else it takes a lot of love and understanding to bring up children , time passes fast , allow your children to look at your hands when they are old and wrinkled and kiss them in a loving way as the hands that held when in pain and stroked the hair on the little heads with love what a nice way to remember my loving hands good luck

Answer 10

IT IS! - BUT YOUR PASTOR HAS NO RIGHT TO MEDDLE IN YOUR PRIVATE AFFAIRS! the disgusting thing is , while some spanking might be appropriate I don't think that using " A ROD" that I consider a weapon is cool!

I vote for a good beating on the pastor! WITH A ROD PLEASE!