What is the funniest blond joke you ever heard?

Answer 1

Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an
elderly and quite ill blonde appeared in a Rochester hospital
emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and
barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.

The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the 911 number
and get an ambulance?"

The lady replied,"My phone doesn't have an eleven!"

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If you don't like that one, here's another:

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being
called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her "go do something to
prove them wrong! Why don't you learn all the state capitals or
something?"

The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up
for two weeks studying.

The next party she goes to, some guy is making dumb blonde
comments to her. She gets all indignant and claims, "I'm NOT a
dumb blonde. In fact, I can name ALL the state capitals!"

The guy doesn't believe her, so she dares him to test her. He
says "Okay, what's the Capital of Montana?"

The blonde tosses her hair in triumph and says, "That's easy!
It's M!"

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Okay, just one more:

A blonde was recently hired at an office. Her first task
was to go out for coffee. Eager to do well her first day
on the job, she grabbed a large thermos and hurried to a
nearby coffee shop.

She held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker
quickly came over to take her order.

She asked, "Is this big enough to hold six cups of
coffee?"

The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a
few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like
about six cups to me."

"Oh good!" the blonde sighed in relief. "Then give me two
regular, two black, and two decaf."

Answer 2

One day there were 2 blondes working on a roadside park, one was digging a hole and the other one was filling it in, many people were very amused by this and finally one man went up to one of the blondes and said, "wow, all of us are impressed by your work, but what are you doing?" So the blonde said to him, " well we are planting trees but the guy who does that is absent today."

Another one:
this is the cleanest blnode joke you'll ever hear.
a blonde went to the airport and bought a 3rd class ticket to texas, but when she got on th plane, she plopped right down in 1st class, so the person who checks your ticket came over and said to her, "ma'am you have a 3rd class ticket, you must move to the back of the plane." The blonde says"i'm blonde, i'm beautiful and i'm going to texas" So he went up to the piolit and said for them to not take off yet, so the piolit says" hold on i'm married to a blonde" so he goes and whispers something into the blondes' ear and she moves right away, so they ask him,"what did you tell her?" the piolit says,"i told her the front of the plane wasn't going to texas"

oh and Britney Spears
now that's a funny blonde joke!!!

Answer 3

KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (Supposedly said to be a real AP headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws and while there, went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands on the back of her head.

One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of her head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked, and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough had struck her in the back of the head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour, until someone noticed and came to her aid.

And yes, Linda is a blonde.

Answer 4

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are on top of a building. they all jump off at the same time. what on lands first?----------The blond, 'cause she has to stop on the way down and ask for directions.LMAO!

Answer 5

What did the blonde say to the barbed wire fence?

I'm gonna get you!

Answer 6

How do you know a girl has a blond boyfriend?

Because she has brusies on her belly button. Ouch

Answer 7

THE BLONDE IN A ROWBOAT, AND THE ONE ABOUT THE BLONDE WHO THOUGHT SHE HAD BEEN SHOT IN THE BACK OF HER HEAD.

Answer 8

Whats the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?...........Harder getting the legs open on an ironing board!!!!!

Answer 9

why do blonds have bruises on their belly buttons???

-blond guys aren't that smart either

Answer 10

not this one