How do I deal with a girl who is not at all hygienic who likes to touch my baby daughter?

Question

I am a minister's wife, and there is a girl who is not very clean (as in, does not wash her hands after she uses the rest room, rubs her nose and hair, does not bathe often, etc) who touches my daughter's hands, arms, and face. Of course, my daughter (who is 6 mos old) pops her hands right in her mouth. I don't let this girl hold her (for other reasons), but she constantly follows us around begging me to hold my daughter and tries to play with her.

How can I deal with this nicely? What would you do?

she is a senior in high school, and definitely has some mental disabilities. I don't think she would qualify as having "mental retardation" (I have heard that this is no longer the correct term,so please forgive me if it is not and it offends you), but she definitely has some mental disability.

She is a nice girl, and I can deal with her when it is just her and me. It is just my daughter's health I am concerned about.

Answer 1

Say you have a clean hands policy for your baby and hand her some hand sanitizer. Just be sure you do this for EVERYONE at the church.

Answer 2

Hand sanitizer is a must.

How old is this girl. Maybe she comes from an unclean family. I would ( depending on her age) Go to her mom if she is really young... But if she is not really young, Not knowing if she has a mental disability I would assume she doesn't or you would have said so..... so assuming she is normal, I would tell her that you would like to speak to her. Take her in private, and give her a health talk about how being clean, and Oder free is a must.

I would ask the girl if you could take her shopping and help her buy some thing to help her be look and smell pretty. Tell her to be careful about touching her nose and hair because there have been some viruses going around and you would hate to see her get sick. And tell her the hand sanitizer heps cut alot of germs.

Tell her the baby is little and you cant let anyone hold her due to the fact that you cant let her get sick she is too small to risk it. Just be nice but firm. If she is too young be MORE firm with her mother.

Edit: Any girl that is a senior in high school would want to know if she wasnt clean. Try to help her. Especially if she is on the slow side.

Answer 3

U keep hand sanitizer and u let people see u use it before u touch the baby and u tell others u have to use it(and make them use it ) because the baby put her hands in her mouth an that u don't want her sick and make sure u administer the amount u want people to have . It's the only way I can think of doing it w/out hurting any feelings and offending anyone.Especially if u live in a city that has cold and flu seasons and people carry germs no matter what and I still keep a bottle of it and I use it faithfully .Also get u one to carry in the purse and set one out(big size) for the church members.Hope this helps.

Answer 4

You have every right to be concerned. With sickness and disease so prevalent these days, you should take every precaution. e-coli, meningitis, TB, just to name a few. These can be some very serious illnesses, especially for babies.
Have you spoken with her parents/guardians?
If you feel you can't do that, then may I suggest that when your daughter isn't around you try to teach her proper hygiene?
Maybe even getting some literature for teenagers that explains proper hygiene.
Being a minister's wife, maybe someone in the congregation would be willing to help out.
There are also, other things you could start...like health awareness week at the church or a health fair...get her involved in an activity to help. Since she wants/needs attention...she may also learn a thing to two.

Answer 5

Well I would tell her nicely please don't touch my daughter and then I would exsplain to her the reason being is you need to work on washing your hands and taking baths and all and if she cannot exsept that then it is your baby she will have to and has for follwing you are round tell her to stop that you don't like to be follwed and all and she is not going to hold your babie until she takes care of her self and all.

I understand where you are coming from I am 24 and married and we have a13 month old and we are having another one march 1st this thursday and I no for sure I would not let anyone like this touch my babies. My 13 month old is a boy and the one that will be here in march is a girl and all.

me and my husband are catholic and all and we are rasing are babies up like so

I would give you my email address but the whole public would see it but if you can find away for me to give you my email adress then I can send it to you...

good luck to you
God Bless You And Your Family

Answer 6

Little girls love to hold babies. Personally, I had a little girl at church who asked me constantly to hold mine. Since she's obviously not getting the training somewhere else, it would be ok for you to lovingly teach this girl.
Say, for instance "Ok, Suzie, my baby would love to get some attention from you. You know babies can easily sick from anyone touching them and giving them germs. Even if that person isn't sick, we all have germs on our hands and faces and touching passes those germs around. For you to help make sure baby doesn't get sice, you run and wash your hands really well then we'll sit down together with the baby."
If needed you could explain to her how germs are in our bodies all the time, on our faces, especially our mouth and nose and even in our breath, etc. She'll probably end up thinking you're the smartest woman in the world!

Answer 7

Well first off, your daughter is still relatively safe because of the natural immunities she still has. She will actually build immunities from the germs she is exposed to during infant hood.

But still, eww. I remember encountering this with my kids, as almost all of my friends were smokers and I didn't want them to rub their smoke on my babies. I started to carry wipees with me just for guests to use before holding them. No one was offended, I am sure they all thought that I was overprotective, but everyone used one. This way the girl will not feel weird even if you ask her politely to wash her hands with the wipe. Don't make a big deal of it, and maybe even use one yourself.

Answer 8

I would find someting that this unsanatary girl really enjoys such as playing monopoly and get into indepth disscusions about this topic that she likes and she will forget about holding your child. You could also say, the baby is heavy and i'm concerned that she will jiggle around and fall while in your arms. Act very loving and sympathetic toward the child. Good luck.

Answer 9

well for one being exposed to germs is how you build your immunity to bugs but on the other hand that is fairly gross so tell her no shes not old enough in your mind and that even if she were older that she would need to wash her hands and be clean before holding her try talking with one of her parents or whom ever is her guardian and get that resolved quickly but the fact that her hands comeso close to a dirty butt is cause to say no and try a gift basket of little girl soap and body stuff tell her its for something and to smell good

Answer 10

Speak to the girl. Tell her that you worry about the safety and health of your baby. You might be doing this girl(didn't state her age)a favor. Maybe no one has instructed her how to take care of herself. Just tell her, you are the Mama, that is your baby and you make the rules! IF she wants to be around you and the baby, she will clean up her act. Don't be afraid of hurting her feelings. Your child comes first.

Answer 11

Just simply explain germs to her and tell her that everyone has them. U can even use that as in excuse to tell her that that is why we have to keep up with our hygiene(as in brushing teeth, showering, and washing our hands). And let her know that doctors recommend that everyone washes their hands before touching a baby beacause they can get very sick.