will you read these emails i got from a girl i like and tell me if i should keep tryin to be friends or not?

Question

For VDAY, i put 2 roses on her windshield while she was at work...
Email 1: Thurs Feb 15
"how do i feel about you?
wow.......i've been thinking about that same thing actually.
i like you.
a lot.
i'm just....i don't wanna date you behind my parents back? ya know?
its hard.
i....i don't even know how to explain it all.
idk.
but yeah... :)"

I have to add more wheni post this, its too long.

PART ONE
i don't even know where to start.
so much is going on it seems.
guess i'll try to cover everything, and if i miss something, let me know.

1) i made the mistake of telling you i liked you. i didn't lie. but now that it's out there, its not good. because if my feelings leave, i'm either gonna have to tell you or let you figure it out for yourself. and i didn't want either to happen. if i'd never said anything, the feelings could come and go and no one would know/care. i like(d) you but there's a lot goin on in my life (or so it seems) and i don't wanna get your hopes up. forget i ever told you anything. i'm NOT saynig the feelings are gone, but...i just wish i'd never said anything, ya know? :)
2) are you jealous of my friends in dbq? i'm not assuming anything or being rude, just asking as innocently as i can :).
i know i go down there a good bit but...there's reasons. haha. i have NO idea how to say or explain those reasons to you but i'll put out a small attempt.

P
these guys in dbq are awesome. i've been waiting since i was like...13 to have good, outgoing, band friends. i know it sounds stupid and immature but its true. these guys are AWESOME. every time we get together with them, we have a blast. i get in trouble at home cuz i never wanna leave there. haha. oh well. i'm not sayin you're not fun cuz you are. i love ya to death. i enjoy hanging out with you but with my stupid dad, it's harder. my rents (or atleast my mom) know LSD (guys from dbq), and so they're ok with me seein' 'em. with you, everything started on the wrong foot. its harder for me to see you. and you never wanna do anything. i mean, you wanna get together, but we can't ever find anything to do. thas not your fault, i know. i'm not blaming you for that, but you never wanna do anything else. you hate shows (the love of my life), you hate(d) bowling (cuz of your class at school), you don't wanna run around walmart and be stupid, all you like to do is sit in your car.

don't take all this personally, i'm not bashing you. i'm just telling you what you wanted me to tell you. i feel like every time i get together with someone else, you're jealous. maybe i'm wrong, i very well could be. but...yeah. idk. they're my friends. and i love them. you're my friend. i love you too.

3) mind games...i know. i'm an idiot. haha. i really feel like i play with your mind too. you're not the only one who thinks this. idk how i do it, but i do. um...i....don't really know what to say to this.
i'm sorry. i am truly and deeply sorry for any confusion i've caused. its been hard being away from my cell phone with you on the other end of it. and rarely talking to you is hard. i mean...it was. nic we talked so much, it was prolly unhealthy. we (whether we wanna admit it or not) were movin waaaaaay to fast. from the moment i met you up until about a couple weeks ago, we talked EVERY DAY.

and pretty much every hour of those days. it was ALL THE FRIGGIN TIME. haha. i'm not saying i didn't wanna talk to you cuz i did. i couldn't WAIT til you called. but thas the thing, getting my phone taken away has helped. i hate saying this but we need(ed) it. the break. yes we still talk often but thas OK. don't think i dont wanna talk to you cuz i do!!!! i just....idk how to say it.

i'm done for now.
i'm sorry i've been an a**hole.
and don't apologize for sending me those emails.
its perfectly alright to get mad on occasion. :)
i can take it.
oh btw, when i say things to you, i'm not ALWAYS sarcastic. you tend to take oh hm EVERYTHING seriously. you need to sit back, relax, realize a girl can KID every once and awhile. you know what i mean? anyways...
i love ya.
i'll ttyl i guess.

*holly

Answer 1

well she sure does want u to change...stay friends but if u are looking for a love interest...either change and be who she wants or find someone else...i'd opt for find someone else

Answer 2

read the first one sounds like she wants u