is it possible to like the idea of someone but not them?

Question

i think i like the idea of some guy but not him. i actually don't like his personality at all. his looks are not that great either. but i still find myself wishing he'd pay me some attention. talk to me, etc.

and when he does, i feel slightly victorious.

what's up with that?

note: i have considered that i could like him despite the fact that i don't think i do but i've come to the conclusion that i really don't. i cannot think of one positive thing to say about him and it's not even that he has hurt my feelings in the past - i just don't like him.

which makes the situation all that much more confusing:

Why do i want HIM to like me enough to pay more attention to me? Why HIM? why not another guy?

Answer 1

maybe you just like attention, a lot of girls do its natural.

Answer 2

weird. But i was just having the same thoughts a minute ago. There's this girl i just met, went out two dates and i swear she's everthing i don't want, but just can't seem to get her out of my mind. She can't hold a decent conversation and has ADHD.

Here's my deductions.

1) It is possible that I feel 'connected' to her since her background and mine are quite similar (growing up in the same neighborhood, same family lifesytle, upbringing, we even share the same hobbies, etc) and maybe deep down inside I've always wanted that.

2) I don't have anyone else that I'm seeing who is a potential partner. (The other one has a jealous ex and i'm not abt to get stuck in that)

3) Because of her past I subconsciously want to "help" or "save" her. Perhaps?

Anyhow, hope this sheds some light on the why. Either that or you're actually a hot chick (or you think you are) who gets the attention all the time, and here comes a guy who doesn't give you jack, so you're feeling pissed off and wondering why and how.

I think i just answered my own question.