guys and girls can answer this too =)?

Question

for girls:
have you guys ever saw this cute guy, but don't know how to talk to him? well i'm in that situation!! i go to this class and there is this guy i think is pretty decent looking. but i don't know how to start off a conversation! i asked him what school he goes to, but that's it. lol
help please?!
please don't simply say this: just go up to him!!
because it's not that easy...... haha

for boys:what do you like when a girl wants to start talking to you? (i don't know if that's grammatically correct. haha)
but when a girl that you'r enot friends with yet starts talking to you, what do you look for?

Answer 1

Do your research on sports and pretend you understand.... smile a lot and talk to him about sports

1. Start with a "hello," and simply tell the new person your name. Offer your hand to shake, upon his or her responding to you. If you already know the person, skip this step and proceed to step 2.
2. Look around. See if there is anything worth pointing out. Sure, talking about the weather is a cliche, but if there's something unusual about it--bam!--you've got a great topic of conversation.
3. Offer a compliment. Don't lie and say you love someone's hair when you think it's revolting, but if you like his or her shoes, or a handbag, say so. A sincere compliment is a wonderful way to get someone to warm up to you. But be careful not to say something so personal that you scare the person off or make him or her feel uncomfortable. It is best not to compliment a person's looks or body.
4.
conversation
Ask questions! People love to talk about themselves --- get them going. "What classes are you taking this year?" "Have you seen (Insert-Movie-Here)? What did you think of it?" Again, keep the questions light and not invasive. Do not ask too many questions if he or she is not responsive to them.
5. And another thing, do not ask any question about yourself, because that will most likely make the conversation about you, and people don't like that either.
6. Jump on any conversation-starters he or she might offer; take something he or she has said and run with it. Agree, disagree, ask a question about it, or offer an opinion, just don't let it go by without notice.
7. Look your newfound friend in the eye, it engenders trust (but don't stare). If the conversation goes on, you can possibly touch (lightly, don't claw) his or her hand, elbow or shoulder. Also, use the person's name a time or two during the conversation; it will help you remember the name, and will draw the person's attention to what you are talking about.
8. "Situational starters" are the best to initiate a conversation. Perceive what's going on around you, and talk about it in an interesting way.
9. Half of an effective conversation is the way you non-verbally communicate, and not necessarily what you say. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident.


Tips

* Just relax. Chances are that whatever small-talk you're making isn't going to stick out in anyone's mind a few months from now. Just say whatever comes into your head, so long as it's not offensive or really weird. (Unless, of course, the person you're attempting to converse with is into weird stuff.)
* It will help if you watch some TV, listen to radio shows, and/or read a lot -- newspapers, magazines, and/or at least a blog or two. You need to have some idea of what is going on in the world. If you are shy, it will be helpful to have thought about a topic or two that you could talk about.
* Follow the lead that your listener is expressing. If he or she appears interested, then continue. If her or she is looking at a clock or watch, or worse, looking for an escape strategy, then you have been going on for too long.
* Interesting and funny quotes or facts can lighten things up, & make way for things to talk about. ;-)



TAlking to a guy you never met




1. Make eye contact. This is a great way to connect to
someone.

2. Smile. The law of reciprocity says to give what you want. You will be amazed how many people smile back if you smile at them.
Be sure it is a relaxed smile. There really isn't a right or wrong way to smile, so relax.


3. Say "Hello" or some other greeting. Be a little creative if you like. Specially if you can determine with certainty his/her first language try to greet with that language. "Aloha" and "Guten Tag" are two favorites. Be careful not to make assumptions about an individual's language based solely upon his/her appearance, however, as he could be offended if you guess incorrectly. Be warned that the more creative you are, the more likely they are to not understand you.


4. Evaluate the situation. If they are not maintaining eye contact with you, did not smile back, or did not respond to your greeting, then they may be otherwise distracted or this may not be a good time. If you will have an opportunity to talk to them soon (i.e. you see them on a regular basis) then you may want to wait. Otherwise continue.


5. Maintain eye contact and keep smiling, but be relaxed. Maintaining eye contact shows you are interested and intent, and generally everyone likes a smile.


6. Comment about something mutual: the weather, sports, work (if you work together), your location or situation (stuck in an elevator), traffic, etc. Talk about something you can both relate to, but not too personal. It's a great way to break the ice.

7. Tell them your name. Again, on the law of reciprocity, if you offer your first and last name then they will typically tell you theirs. But, it's better to start with your first name.

8. Offer your hand. If you offer your hand, then they will usually shake it.

9. Ask them a question, especially about Family, Occupation or Recreation (remember what questions are FOR). These are great things to ask questions about if you cannot think of anything else. It is important when asking questions that you are not interrogating them. Most people love to talk about themselves, but if they don't, then don't press them.

10. Listen to what they say. Remember details. Ask more questions that show you were paying attention.
> Categories > Getting a Date

How to Talk to Someone You've Never Met
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Speaking to someone you've never met, even a guy, is easy. The secret is not to get nervous, pay attention and ask questions. You should not wait too long, because if you do, someone else might talk to him first, and then he will be gone. Take a deep breath, think of a good salutation, and go for it!
Steps

1. Make eye contact. This is a great way to connect to someone.
2. Smile. The law of reciprocity says to give what you want. You will be amazed how many people smile back if you smile at them. Be sure it is a relaxed smile. There really isn't a right or wrong way to smile, so relax.
3. Say "Hello" or some other greeting. Be a little creative if you like. Specially if you can determine with certainty his/her first language try to greet with that language. "Aloha" and "Guten Tag" are two favorites. Be careful not to make assumptions about an individual's language based solely upon his/her appearance, however, as he could be offended if you guess incorrectly. Be warned that the more creative you are, the more likely they are to not understand you.
4. Evaluate the situation. If they are not maintaining eye contact with you, did not smile back, or did not respond to your greeting, then they may be otherwise distracted or this may not be a good time. If you will have an opportunity to talk to them soon (i.e. you see them on a regular basis) then you may want to wait. Otherwise continue.
5. Maintain eye contact and keep smiling, but be relaxed. Maintaining eye contact shows you are interested and intent, and generally everyone likes a smile.
6. Comment about something mutual: the weather, sports, work (if you work together), your location or situation (stuck in an elevator), traffic, etc. Talk about something you can both relate to, but not too personal. It's a great way to break the ice.
7. Tell them your name. Again, on the law of reciprocity, if you offer your first and last name then they will typically tell you theirs. But, it's better to start with your first name.
8. Offer your hand. If you offer your hand, then they will usually shake it.
9. Ask them a question, especially about Family, Occupation or Recreation (remember what questions are FOR). These are great things to ask questions about if you cannot think of anything else. It is important when asking questions that you are not interrogating them. Most people love to talk about themselves, but if they don't, then don't press them.
10. Listen to what they say. Remember details. Ask more questions that show you were paying attention.
11. Eventually they will probably ask you a question, too (law of reciprocity). This is called a conversation. Answer their questions, but don't get to caught up talking about yourself.


Tips

* Practice smiling and saying "Hello" with every stranger you meet. You will be surprised how many people respond positively. Practice "small talk" too. This will build your comfort level and help you be more relaxed. And you may make more new friends in this process.
* Laugh at their jokes.
* Remember, they are probably shy, too.
* Be sincere.
* As you get to know someone, they become more comfortable with you. The secret is to never push their comfort level.
* Start talking to them from a safe distance, but not so far away they cannot hear you. As they become more comfortable, you can move closer.
* If they appear uncomfortable, then give them space and slow down.
* Remember what they say, and reference it next time you talk to them. That will show you paid attention.
* Think of how you would initially react when you recognise a familiar friend; your body orientation, eye movement, tone of voice, type of smile. Then try to mimic it upon meeting a stranger.
* Don't take it personally if the individual is arrogant, sarcastic, or otherwise rude in his/her initial reply. This is a sign of emotional immaturity and is usually a maladaptive defense mechanism. Confident, self-actualized people will always remain polite yet assertive even when approached by someone they don't have the least bit of interest in talking to. Simply laugh it off as if they told a joke and move on, paying them no more attention. They didn't tell a joke, of course: they were the joke.
11. Eventually they will probably ask you a question, too (law of reciprocity). This is called a conversation. Answer their questions, but don't get to caught up talking about yourself.

Answer 2

I’m a guy and know what you’re talking about. It’s very hard for me to make the first move also, but you will find that life is a long line of confusing situations. It would be best for you to ask your self this question “What do I have to loose, and what do I have to gain?” I believe you have nothing to loose and everything to gain from making the first move. If you’re sure you want to go with this guy you can just pay a little more attention to what he likes and dislikes. I guess I’m saying just let him know your interested in him with out being overbearing. Good guys hate when even a great looking woman comes on to strong.

Answer 3

Dont be llike actors.

You approach him for example, with a challange like course work or home work since you r in the same class.
While assisting you start off any disscussion.
Eg: Do you like soccer, i know boys you like soccer. if yes what team do you support? tell me more............... you know like that and you will continue.

the fact that he will give you room to assist you may mean that he is Kind enough and may be interested in you.

if he answers your questions and eager to speak to then may he has some interest in you or admired you and probaly it go on well.

Start on with anything it can be an argument or debate like thing.
think off anything from soccer, social life, school politics..... something you real you can sharewith him.

Answer 4

I know just how you feel!! Just keep in mind that boys are human too, they worry about talking to girls just as much as we worry about them! Just be confident! Try to meet eyes and give him a brief smile... maybe the next day hold it a little longer and then look away and bite your lip...that should give him a clue, and its cute!! hehe and I know its TOTALLY not easy to "just go talk to him!!" So I hope this helps :D

Answer 5

Find an excuse to talk to him like can I borrow a pencil or something simple like that..then just try to start a conversation casually.

Answer 6

Nothing more than to listen to what she has to say and answer appropriately. And then get in her pants! Ha! just kidding, I love to rap with chicks about everything!, and anything. I am my girls best friend, I have been surrounded by them my whole life.

Answer 7

yup i know going up to him isnt easy but u gotta try
sit next to him in class, if he's quiet engage in conversations about the teacher the lecture his old school or his shoes (if their nice)
spot something he's wearing or has that tells you something about him like fave football baseball soccer team fave store..fave celebs

Answer 8

i feel ur pain.. it isnt that easy just to walk up to a guy... if hes smart, ask him for help on a homework question, if hes not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, ask him something thatll spark his interests , like football! but always act like yourself.

Answer 9

the best new conversation i had with a woman was humorous.....and somehow very slightly seductive........it was so alluring. when u speak to him, i suggest that u let him know very, very subtly that u are available and interested.

Answer 10

I really just look to see what they have to say ?

I mean whatd else would I be looking at ?

Answer 11

-nice smile
-some connection from the start
-the way she acts