To all my fellow South Africans! I am curious to know how do you cope living in a foreign country and what do?

Question

u do if the blues strike u and u feel like giving up and going home??
What motivates u to stick it out in the foreign country??

Answer 1

Stiff upper lip lad, if you are getting down, contact your Embassy coz they have contacts for social groups for their own people and you can try and make friends once you find out where they meet. Keep a diary or journal of your feelings and hardships etc, and how you overcame them and write a self-help book for others in a similar situation.....there's always something to be learned from the situations we find ourselves in....be motivated to solve the problem. You have to go out and find a life....it won't come knocking on the door.

Answer 2

Living in the Far East is so foreign among foreign experiences, if I go to England now, it would almost be like going home. Here almost nobody can communicate with you, you can't read anythingb and children stare at the "white giant" with the big eyes as if you're some alien (which is exactly true...).
The familiarities of home becomes, therefore, exessively precious.
The way of doing and thinking is also very different from "Western" conduct and copious amounts of lateral thinking is needed.
My main source of sanity is the net. It's like a window on ...well whatever you want it to be on. Often South African stuff. And new services of some chat servers enables one to call home from one's computer at the price of a local call (free if you call to another computer). Broadband connection is also extremely cheap. I'm connected to a local community network for R40 per month unlimited access.
One or 2 other South Africans here in Taichung City, Taiwan, make boerewors and since there are quite a lot of us here, there are frequent braais on the roof of my apartment building, 23 floors above the city traffic.
It's all temporary escape, though. There's still nothing like the real thing and I look forward to when I'll sit next to a campfire again, Amstel in my hand, barefoot in the soil of my motherland with the sun setting behind the African bush.
That hope keeps me going. For hope is a good thing...probably the best thing we have.

Answer 3

It is strange how memory works, like with giving birth you forget the pain and only remember the good parts.
I left South Africa in the 70's to live in the UK. At the time my wife and I were beach babies spending our whole weekend on the beach. It was a real shock coming here and with my whole family in SA I did get homesick.
I went back in 1982 as my Mom was ill and my Dad had just died.
This was the best thing that I could have done. Things are never the same as one remembers and even sees on a holiday.
Having travelled through Europe and lived in a country where people do not throw tantrums in the bank because they are offline ect. I started to miss the UK and deciden to come back.
I have been back for years now and never look back.
If I see a bokkie rugby shirt aproaching me I cross the road as they all depress me, sort of like the Rhodies used to in SA. I do have two South African couples that we are friends with but they are people we knew in Cape Town.
The best thing to do is not to hanker after the things of the past and live the future. As we are older now we do not need the beach all the time but if we need a fix it is just as nice in the Vendee or Cote d'azure in France and you are less likely to be robbed or killed. I love it here now and will never go back,even on holiday. I have a daughter and grandson in Cape Town and I get them here every year rather than go there.
I cheer for England in Rugby and cricket as this is my country now. So, to those that long for the old country I suggest that you go back, Life is more comfortable the second time around.
See you then.

Dolphinlami: I have given up all of the various things that people hanker over but now and then still get some boerewors for a braai when my SA friends are here. I find the best are from Baynham butchers, he is from Zim I believe ( he has several shops Fareham , Southampton, Winchester but there are places all over London and the south.

Answer 4

The feeling you might be having are the same with all expats all over the world, whether the UK, US, France, Aussie or NZ. Its all teh same pain and that feeling yof nostalgia you just can't get rid of . You can play your South African music, get together with some friends for a real braai (no Stella Artois). Get your friends and family to post you Tastic Rice, and Robertson's spices and all that interesting food we have at home. Make your own biltong, and sell it too (they love it here).

But most of all, you have to remember why you came here. Why you left your home, your friends, your country, your comfort zone. Why did you do that? That is what will keep you going.

You'll be fine, enjoy the country, on your days off, go to a place you don't know. Book some cheap bus trips, flights or train trips all around the country and stay in hostels (keep it cheap). Go to games, fairs, exhibitions. Take loads and loads of photos. Get on Skype, call home, but not too much that you end up feeling more lonely.

South Africans do like sticking together, when they leave the country (not to sit and talk about the long lost country). In Florida, North Carolina, New Jersey, Atlanta, and Michigan they meet for Braais. In France, they meet and devour meet like real South Africans do. In England, its the same, Braais, but no wors (sorry). If anyone knows where it is, let me know, my friend is dying for some.

Enjoy England. Have fun, you only live once.

Answer 5

Its hard to tell someone else what to do although from personal experience i can tell you frankly that it never goes away 100%.
If you still have family, friends etc back home the best way that i found was to use modern technology and chat to them daily using a cam in order to see them. Get something like a hobby going, or start doing something that you never had the time for like learning how to play a musical instrument.
As in the previous answer, join a group of fellow expats. South Africans are spread across the world, and believe me, wherever you are, you are bound to find people in the same situation. Hope this helps a bit, all expats go through this stage, especially when you are on your own.

Answer 6

what motivates us to stick it out in a foreign country is the fact that we are living better lives than we would be in our own SA.In fact the blues dont ever go away(as mentioned in the previous 2 answers)contact the SA embassy who can give you phone no. of various SA groups where youll be able to meet new buddies who will help you to feel better. Lifes a bugger when your far from home. But friends (not only SA)are a great help so make friends lots of them and youlll soon feel better. Goodluck.Ive been living abroad for 16years and still get the blues every so often.Head up old chum its not that bad.

Answer 7

Well, it's reallly hard and for me, there are more down times than up. I left because I wanted to give my kids a safer life. We have got together with other South Africans AND Zimbabweans because they are very friendly, adaptable and quite educated. They make the most of situations and we all get along very well.
South Africa has some of the best food in the world and compared to where we are now, they have a huge variety of fish.
I will always miss South Africa but I don't have the guts to return.
You have to just bite down and make the best of your situation. Good Luck, I will pray for you, fellow South African.

Answer 8

Been in Uk for 6 years now and still cannot get used to it. When i feel down and out i play my Afrikaans Music, have a good cry and feel slightly better. Fortunately for us phoning home is very cheap and i keep in touch with friends and family that way or skype. See more of them now than i did at home. I would move back to S-Africa in a flash, i see, read, hear mostly bad reports, i believe them but S-Africa is in my blood and i love the atmosphere there. I stay here because my hubby is here, my one daughter works in London she has an excellent job gets good pay and my other children have moved back to SA. Will be there soon for holiday and cannot wait. Yahoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo:)))))

Answer 9

Well I left the country for the same reasons as everyone else, I have been here in the UK for 5years now. I have got feed up of the UK and it PC, when I get sad and all emotional I think back to the last time I went on a holiday and for some reason it cheers me up and help me I watch SA play rugby and cricket and the Sharks on Sky, but I have decided to move to a friendlier country than the UK The Netherlands, my suggestion is that you try to find groups of South Africans and make your way into the group.

Answer 10

I'm coming home on the 24th of March and that's all that's making it better... And i guess it also depends on where you live, because we lived in Lebanon for little over a year and i cried the whole time. Now we're back in Saudi and its a bit better, surprisingly there's more to do here even with all the restrictions... All i can say is hang in there and pray alot because it helps and good luck to everybody that still has to make the decision of leaving that beautiful country of ours...