its really hard to keep moving on
when you know your stuck in place
and thats why im writing this song
cause i keep seeing your face
what am i gonna do
cause i cant shift the gears
my thoughts still drift of you
after ive dried my tears
i'll put the pedal to the floor
but i know it wont do any good
cause you've shut and locked the door
maybe ive misunderstood
(Chorus)
and now im stuck in second place
i know that i cant win
traviling down the wrong road
friendship is just another dead end
ive run this race so long
i know how its gonna end
with another sad song
and im still just a friend
are you waiting for me to wreck
to get me off your back
maybe i'll break my neck
when my car leaves the track
but i'll keep moving on
do what ever it takes
till the night runs into dawn
even if my body breaks
(Chorus)
im stuck in second place
and i know that i cant win
traviling down the wrong road
whats around the bend?
2007-02-24 15:03:52 · 20 answers · asked by Zach S 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Music
The lyric's great.. Just keep up on the melody and tune... = )
2007-02-24 15:06:38 · answer #1 · answered by genius_06 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's pretty good, but it needs some work. You have to change the second line, because it doesn't really make sense. I don't like the whole stuck in second place theme. I would go with "I'm losing the race" or something simular to that effect. The word stuck goes good with gear. I would also suggest you look again over your verses and see if you can improve on some of them. I think you can. Keep up the good work, but you still have a ways to go. If you write the music, that's really the key, to whether people are really going to like the song or not.
2007-02-24 15:31:23 · answer #2 · answered by Waldo Waldo Waldo! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have tried writing songs and I can only say congratulations. That is an awesome set of lyrics, but I do recommend doing a whole soft rock melody, because it would be a perfect compliment to the lyrics. If I were, I would switch the ending to
im stuck in second place
and i know i cant win
Please don't take offense to my suggestion, but I believe you should end with that because I think it would sound better, however, you wrote this awesome song, so, do what you think is best.
Congrats!
2007-02-24 15:12:54 · answer #3 · answered by Stonehead Gorilla. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've seen lyrics. And I've seen poetry. Some people think as long as it rhymes it's great. Some people think as long as it has emotional content, it's wonderful. And by these measures, I've seen some horrid lyrics, and some awful poems.
But this is good. It definitely sounds like a song I'd hear on the radio. It's not supremely original, but what song about love is? Love is love, and you have to tell it like it is. I certainly can't complain about this. It doesn't annoy me, it's not cheesy, and it seems to have the potential to be catchy. Lyric writing is no walk in the park, and yet you've managed to make it rhyme AND make sense. Best of luck to you! I think it has lots of potential.
2007-02-24 15:11:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Not bad for an amateur in terms of content. But metaphors about cars and racing really don't do justice to the feelings of inferiority that you're trying to convey to your listeners.
Unless you're writing this for the NASCAR crowd or the sequel to Talledega Nights.
2007-02-24 15:18:35 · answer #5 · answered by nicolosi81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm guessing the song is about someone who wants to be more than friends with another person but unfortunately they're obviously not making any progress.I'd say good job. if you just wrote the song I'm also guessing it may not be copy written, be careful about putting lyrics on the net that can be stolen if its not copy written :)
2007-02-24 15:16:30 · answer #6 · answered by @ _ease_wit_lyfe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is the prechorus and what is the verse? is there a bridge? the part that starts with are you waiting for me to wreck could be more metaphorical adn remember to try to make the lyrics more universal so it might appeal to more situations or people.
2007-02-24 15:09:08 · answer #7 · answered by Danielle 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wright songs my self, I wish some of my band members could write songs that well. I like it, it could be a hit.
2007-02-24 15:12:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well, this is great, and no i am not lying! i think you should put some music to and put it on myspace.com and i'm sure that people will listen. but sense i like rock, i think you should put it ot ROCK!YEA!LOL:))
2007-02-24 15:46:52 · answer #9 · answered by china_attire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its an okay country song
2007-02-24 15:13:07 · answer #10 · answered by bbal40 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋