Can I file for custody of my child before a divorce is filed?

Question

Due to the fact that my last Q was misunderstood by some I am posting another one.

I seriously think that my spouse is suffering from either manic depression or some sort of split personality disorder. It runs in her family. She also may have a learning disability causing her to be an incompitent mother. Lately she has become very hostile toward me then the next day being very nice then going right back to hostile. I want to know I can file for sole custody before a divorce is filed. I may be deploying in the near future and do not want my daughter living with her. I have tried marriage counseling but no progress has been made. I've tried talking to her but get nothing but hostile responses. I am not able to make doctor appointments for her because she is no longer in a military hospital. Who can I go through to require an evaluation to be done?

Answer 1

Yes you can - I haved worked in child welfare
No-one holds legal custody until it is established in family court - sounds weird but its true. Any parent, grandparent etc can file a custody petition at any time. I would do so ASAP if I were you!

Answer 2

You need to ask your wife to submit to a psychiatric exam. Tell her you want to help her and she needs to be evaluated in order to save your marriage. If you can't do this, then get an attorney immediately. Choose one who specializes in family law and ask how to best protect your child. If all else fails, Children and Youth Services could remove the child from your home until a judge sets a temporary guardian for the child (like a relative) while you are away.

Answer 3

only a judge could order an evaluation unless she became a threat to herself or others. you can file for custody before the divorce, but being that your about to deploy may pose a problem with the courts. i'm sure you'd have a suitable family member to care for her while your gone, but they may think the birth mother is better. if there are circumstances making her an unfit mother, you could always call social services and have them make a welfare check, but i would only do that if you think she is truly unfit and that they would find evidence of that when they visit.

Answer 4

Get yourself an attorney and file for legal custody. If she is incompetent you can get custody before the actual divorce but you will have to go to court and get an emergency order. Document everything that is going on to prove that she is not capable of taking care of the child. Good luck

Answer 5

1. YES you can file before you file for divorce...
2. I really dont believe that a learning disability has anything to do with mothering (as I am Dislexic)....
3. At this point there maybe no way for you to help her....only she can help herself!

Answer 6

I would highly suggest you talk to a lawyer now. They usually will do the first consultation for free. The laws probably vary from state to state as to who retains custody while the divorce procedings are going on.

You owe it to your child to make sure she is safe and protected. Do whatever you can now so that you are not sorry later.

Good luck!

Answer 7

depends on the state but generally yes you can. but be warned it usually comes with a order for protection and legal separation. divorce must be filed shortly after.

Answer 8

im hearing alot about how she treats you but nothing about how she is with the child maybe you should be the one getting checked

Answer 9

get her checked for bipolar, no you cannot, the papers must be filed, or you can't take custody because you'd still share him/her