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Question

Do people generally have your trust until they do something to lose it, or not have your trust until they do something to gain it????
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Explain your answer......

Thanks, for answering in advance!;-)

*Have a nice weekend*

Take care!

Thanks, Don H:)
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Thanks, Jimmy and Amp:)
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Answer 1

Good question. I know that in North America the courts have an innocent until proven guilty stance. In France they believe that you're guilty until proven innocent. I'm afraid I'm more aligned with the French on this one...I tend to have a suspicious nature. I've become pretty jaded over the years, especially given where I work. I've seen some of the worst of humanity. You start to distrust everyone. It seems as though everyone cheats & lies & steals & hurts others...I know there are still some good people out there. I'm very loving & fiercely loyal to those I love & trust. But when it comes to strangers, I expect the worst. I lock my doors constantly. You have to. People get their cars stolen & homes broken into all the time. Some people never lock their doors. I'm not so trusting. I see the sh%$ that goes on. You can't trust anyone. My boyfriend gets frustrated with me and thinks I'm too negative & distrustful but in some ways he could learn a thing or two from me. He's more positive than me & believes the best about people but as a result he's been taken advantage of in the past. He's been duped, betrayed & exploited. Meanwhile I suspect people who haven't even done anything wrong & perhaps alienate people to some degree...drive them away so they can't hurt me & maybe they wouldn't have anyway...it's a defense mechanism. I suppose a happy medium would be good. Open your heart to trust, but not too much. Know when to be cautious. In today's world you have to be a little bit suspicious & cautious just to arm yourself against potential dangers. No one's pulling the wool over my eyes...Maybe I am a bit distrustful & negative but I'm just trying to protect myself from being hurt. I've seen too many trusting people get hurt & it makes me angry. My trust has to be earned. I can't just give it freely when I don't know whether it's deserved.

Answer 2

I cant really say if they have my trust. Yup, I dont suspect people and over a period of time u can make out how reliable the other person is ? Whether u can count on him or not .
For me, intuition also plays a great role. With some people you start feeling comfortable from the very first meeting so much that question of trust doesn't arise and in other cases we get negative vibes.
If ever my trust is broken, I wont trust that person again or will always be alarmed but this will not stop me from trusting somebody else.
And yes, some people have to earn it also. As in, if I have to keep a baby sitter for my child, I'll keep a check on her activities for some time till I am sure she is doing her best in taking care of the baby whether some body is keeping an eye on her or not .
Answer to this question can not be generalized . It will change depending on the situation & the person you are dealing with + our own state of mind at that point .

Answer 3

Think about your two possibilities. A person exists who does not trust people first off - until they "earn it", and then there's another person who does trust others - until they do something to lose that trust.

Encountering either type, to which would you offer initial (unqualified) trust? To the person who doesn't trust you? Trust needs to be mutual. It doesn't really work if it's only one sided.

I tend to trust someone until (or if) they do something to lose that trust.

I once knew someone who I never really trusted or respected. They ended up mentioning once that they were taught to never give trust (or respect someone) until it was "earned". Well, I never earned their trust/respect, and I gave up thinking they would ever be trust worthy (or respectable). Basically, you can't trust someone who doesn't offer trust without some undefined "trust test".

On the other hand, I think that a business has every right to give trust (that you will repay a loan, let's say) only after you have shown you can be trusted to do so. That's why a trustworthy person (someone who does and has repaid one or more loans) usually co-signs a young person's first bank loan.

Answer 4

I think that question pretty much goes along with my question about the things everybody experiences.
I guess you could call them the "Facts of Life".

Yeah, you will put trust in people, but someday you will lose that trust. How you react is all up to you.
Somebody trusts you and how you react to that trust is again a part of life which we all face from time to time.
There are all kinds of factors that change the outcome of the situation.

It is not something that is "General". It can happen at the weirdest of times. Mostly when you are unexpecting it.

It is bizarre how it happens. It is what makes us who we are.

Answer 5

It depends on wheither you are a trusting person by nature.

I am a trusting person and give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try not to judge at all initially. Its the humanitarian side of me.

So yes, i would trust, until the trust was ruined.

Although i have been taken for a 'mug' on more than one occasion for being so charitable, i still continue to be trusting because my 'higher self' tells me this is the right thing to do.

Answer 6

You get a measure of trust from the beginning and if you screw up a bit, you lose ground. Screw up royally and you pretty much are out of the game. Do great for a long time and you are a veteran and if you screw up your track record may save you some face. I like to trust, because I hate conflict, so if someone messes me over I pretty much am done with them. I don't want to bother with things like 3 strikes, so 1 strike, YOU'RE OUT!!

Answer 7

Generally, I trust people --- until they "do something to lose it"

I suppose this has to do with how I was raised. My parents didn't lie to me, as far as they knew. And, they expected the same of me. I suppose I assumed everyone else was the same based on my experience and am still that way today.

I know now that people can't always be trusted--so I try to keep a guard up. I don't give out information that is important to me if I don't really know the person.

Answer 8

People have to gain my trust, simply because the human race in general isn't all that compassionate and caring, so I make sure I know who I'm trusting.

Answer 9

I just trust people. That doesn't mean that I don't pay attention to what is going on but I do give everyone the chance to be honest with me.

Often I have been known to give people a couple of chances, if they needed more than one.

Love and blessings Don

Answer 10

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt until they squander it. but not necessarily complete trust until they've earned it. For instance; I might give a stranded stranger a couple of bucks to put gas in their car to get home if they forgot their wallet (it's happened to me) and assume they weren't scamming me. But i wouldn't leave them with my kids.
Good question!