Sometimes when my baby cries for a long time and I can't control her crying I get so frustrated and then I start to even feel some anger. Am I a bad mother?
2007-02-24 11:43:39 · 13 answers · asked by guardianangel 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
It's the "dark side" that mothers rarely talk about. You feel frustrated, angry, resentful...then guilty for feeling all those normal feelings. I know exactly how you feel and I tell all my friends with infants,"Its okay to walk away." What I mean is when you feel yourself getting frustrated and possibly losing control, then set him down in the crib, close the door and get to the furthest point you can and sit. I even bought earplugs! I just would sit by myself for 10, 15 sometimes 30 min and I always felt better after. I even got so frustrated once, that I went upstairs to the spare bedroom and slammed the door over and over again(not one of my finest moments). Don't worry about the baby, they're totally fine in the crib and will not choke(which I'd freak about) or hate you. It's okay to feel this way, and it's okay to talk about it. Just remember to walk away and you'll be just fine. You're not a bad mother, you're human. This too shall pass...my son is now 20 months old and I sometimes look at him and wonder how we got through those first months! Good luck!
2007-02-24 14:31:55 · answer #1 · answered by emrobs 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it can definitely be frustrating when the baby is crying for a long period and nothing seems to soothe them. It is perfectly okay to put the baby in the crib and go take 10 minutes to cool down before you try again to calm the baby. And you never know, the baby may just fall asleep in that time :)
2007-02-24 12:39:00 · answer #2 · answered by Erika 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not a bad mother, I sure every mother has felt this way. You should try and keep calm as your baby can pick up on you getting frustrated and unfortunately it makes them cry even more. If possible try get someone else to take over trying to settle baby when you feel yourslef starting to get frustrated, this usually works. I can tell you this from experience with my little one when he won't settle down and I start getting frustrated about it, my mum takes over and he usually settle within a few minutes.
2007-02-25 16:45:34 · answer #3 · answered by Amanda B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not a bad mother, you are just human. This is a normal reaction for the sleep deprivation and the huge surge of hormones that you have been going through.
You could be going through the baby blues, or post natal depression. A chat with your doctor/midwife should point you in the right direction.
2007-02-24 12:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Pamela♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you're not! i know it's frustrating to hear your child cry and not be able to stop it. as long as you don't act on your anger you are not a bad mother! try taking a few minutes away from your child to just breath and relax.
2007-02-24 12:34:44 · answer #5 · answered by The Spazz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you take it out on the kid.
Try some stress-relievers like these:
Jog in place for 15 minutes
Fill a balloon with sand and squeeze it like you're making dough
Watch something funny enough to make you laugh out loud.
Have quick, hot sex with your husband / boyfriend.
If none of these work or appeal to you, call your local crisis hotline and talk it out with someone.
2007-02-24 11:57:54 · answer #6 · answered by Matt P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same.....sometimes I even cry with my baby together....
BAby feels anger and frustration and cry even more....so just think about how much u love your little angel...kiss her ....stroke her head....she will feel it and calm down
2007-02-24 13:10:56 · answer #7 · answered by Vanessa L 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no your not a bad mom, its normal to feel angry thats a part of life..But dont take your anger out on your baby, you need to be patient!...if you get angry..just let the baby cry for a minute!..he/she will be ok!...just not for a long period of time of course!...if the dad is there, have him help you or who ever is there with you!...while you catch your breath! :)...
2007-02-24 11:50:00 · answer #8 · answered by babygirlz3n2 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not at all, this is natural part of having a baby, it happens to many parents and it has to be with stress, change of life and specially to the mom it can be part of a post part-um depression and hormonal changes / imbalance that she has to go through.
*** Talk to you doctor about it and talk to your partner as well, this is something normal and that can be delt with easily.
2007-02-24 12:00:27 · answer #9 · answered by wanna_help_u 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no this is normal. Put her in her crib and go take a breather outside if you need to. It is ok if you let her cry for 10-15 minutes or so if you need to gain your composure.
2007-02-24 11:47:42 · answer #10 · answered by R♥bin 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋