If so many people want friends and relatives to "throw a bash" when they die, why doesn't it ever happen??

Question

I would love for my friends and family to have a throw down and play my fav tunes along with my fav food and adult beverages, celebrating my life. Absolutely NO BLACK CLOTHING ALLOWED! I've heard that many people ask for the same, but funerals continue to be depressing and morbid. Shouldn't we be respecting the wishes of our lost ones rather than our own??

This question is coming from a debate that a friend of mine is having with her mother-in-law. My friends husband died of cancer two days ago, and as he was dying over the past year, he made everyone promise to throw a party on the beach if it was warm when he died or at his home if it was too cold. Either way, he wanted a celebration after his cremation. No funeral. He wanted music, his music, casual dress, lots of food and drinks, etc. Well, his mother is determined to have a funeral at a cemetary where everyone is in black and she wants the reception at her home with the typical catered funeral food and flowers. I know that this guy would be really upset if he knew what was up. But his wife has control, so hopefully she'll do the right thing.

Answer 1

I'm agreeing with anyone who says that it would be too difficult for the deceased's loved ones immediately after the death. It would probably be easier to have a more genuinely meant party like that after a bit of time had passed. The ones left behind need time to mourn the loss, and THEN they should try to respect their loved one's wishes and have a "throw down."

Answer 2

I think if someone you loved, and was your friend or relative, that it would a bit hard to party after your funeral. Then it would be a bit hard to have the party spirit, thus making your wishes incomplete, so why party at all?

I mean, if you just died; are they supposed to be happy about that?

Answer 3

Well, the funeral homes would lose business if they condoned some of that kind of practices. I do know of a family who celebrated in their home, and partyed and buried the man with a carton of cigs, and a bottle of liquor. I personally find it strange.

Answer 4

yeha i bet that would be cool. but i think that people r just to sad and upset over the loss of a loved one that they just cant help but feel sad and not throw a big party to celibrate that persons life, even if thats what that person wanted.

Answer 5

Maybe they are broke after the funeral costs

Answer 6

It happens in New Orleans all the time.