like for say my makeup is to dark your shirt is to wrinkled. Maybe you should get some highlights in your hair . What does he mean when he is doing this to me? Is it wrong for him to say things like this and how do I handle this I am getting to the point where I wanna leave him . It hurts my feelings alot when he does this. I tell him it does but he still continues to do this. Anything I do is never right.
2007-02-24 09:31:35 · 27 answers · asked by jennifer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't let him treat you like this. It's time for a wake up call for him. You should leave him because he thinks you won't so he is treating you like a door mat. He is probably doing it to make himself feel better. He probably isn't happy with himself so he is pointing out your flaws. I know after 10 years it is kind of scary being alone but is this life any better. Maybe even a temporary (don't tell him it's temporary though) split up would help him realize what he has. Good luck!!
2007-02-24 09:38:17 · answer #1 · answered by JUDY T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE HIM! This is a form of abuse! You should not put up with it at all! If it makes you feel bad it impacts badly on your well being and your relationships. I suspect that you have low self esteem (probably from all the things he is saying) so I would, after leaving his a**, work on that and build yourself up a bit before entering in another relationship. As for him, don't worry about hurting his feelings because he deserves to get what he gives. When you leave him, tell him exactly why and tell him that it's too late for him to change because you have already lost your patience with him. 10 years is a long time to be taking this kind of abuse - even if he only started to do this 5 years ago - it's still too long! There are many men out there who will treat you the way you should be treated. This guy is not one of them! For your safety and for your future - walk away from this one! It may hurt at first but in the long run, you will know you made the right decision and respect yourself more for it! Good luck!
2007-02-24 17:40:04 · answer #2 · answered by CurlyLocks 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it may be that you let yourself go after so many years and he's saying those things. Break up with him, and I guarantee that he'll be crawling back to you very soon. Sometimes wake up calls can work. Tell him you're sick of the name calling and that you can do better. It may work. I hope you aren't name calling him back, if you are, then you are just feeding into this and that's what he wants. Next time he does it, walk away. But if I was you, I would try this and see if it works, if not, then I'd be moving on with your life. This isn't the type of person you want to marry, so I highly suggest doing something about it now.
2007-02-24 17:47:15 · answer #3 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not ok for him to be doing this to you. Sometimes we get into a thing where you know it is time to get out and let it all go, but then you start to think "god, we've been together too long for me to get out." It's not to late, at least not yet. Make it clear about what you are going to do and if he still continues doing this, you have to leave. Your self-confidence is not negotiable. He is tearing you down bit by bit and no man is worth that. Find a man who deserves you and treats you well. Don't settle. As for your man, let him go and get some mail order bride, that will bow to his every whim. Good Luck!!!
2007-02-24 17:59:01 · answer #4 · answered by BED 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. Guys like that do little more than destroy your self esteem. I dated a guy for about a year and half who was was constantly picking at me for my weight, how I dressed, the way I did my hair, etc. It was like, he wanted me to feel like I was crap and that he was doing me a favor to date me. My family and friends all liked him... until I told them some of the things he would say to me. It was pretty much unanimous... leave the jerk. We split up (actually he dumped me, and then came crawling back 6 months later after I'd lost 15 pounds, lol!) and man I couldn't believe how much better I felt after that. Felt an anchor had been taken off my self confidence.
It isn't love when they make you feel bad about yourself.
2007-02-24 17:36:55 · answer #5 · answered by Jadalina 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
seems as if he is shallow, is disrespectful, and really doesn't care about your feelings. 10 years is a long relationship to be in and not be married, if he is constantly finding fault, and putting u down, it may be time to find a new life, since he don't seem to be happy with what he has. once they begin commenting on our physical parts, or how we wear our make up, our our clothing, it is only a matter of time till they want to go outside the relationship and find someone else. it is just what kind of man u have, he is shallow and immature.
2007-02-24 18:32:27 · answer #6 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend is putting you down and you have told him that you don't like it and he still won't listen then it sounds like you need to break up with the boyfriend. You can find someone who would treat you better than you are being treated. I was once married to a man who was always putting me down. I could barely stand the man. We eventually got divorced and it was the best thing in the world that I could have done for myself.
2007-02-24 18:23:42 · answer #7 · answered by Nancy M. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Plan where you're gonna go and GO.....that's it.
I'm sure this guy hasn't JUST started this. After all this time he hasn't changed,,,,Time to go. At first he did it and you took his suggestions. Then you noticed the "suggestions" didn't stop RIGHT? I'm sure you aren't that overweight either....you'd have to be anorexic and MAYBE he'll stop the weight comments
Get out and find a good guy
2007-02-24 17:44:32 · answer #8 · answered by phillyvic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
10 years is a long time. He hasn't committed to marriage in all this time and hearing about his behavior, I'd recommend you get your stuff together and head out of town. Don't waste your time with this guy anymore. He sounds like he's not secure within himself and lets this out on the person closest to him because he knows you're not gonna do anything about it. This should change. Now. Please don't invest any more into this.
2007-02-24 17:40:49 · answer #9 · answered by VW 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Many women have been in an abusive relationship sometime in their life.
He is probably doing it because he lacks confidence in himself. That is the reason why most bullies pick on others, including their girlfriend.
You should talk to him about how his bullying is hurting you. If the relationship continues to be harmful and abusive, you should leave him.
2007-02-24 17:36:40 · answer #10 · answered by shugo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋