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me and my ex are in the middle of a custody battle of my son. Last month he made an excuse to stay over (he lives miles away) I have now found out that he's used pictures of my flat in his court statement. Saying that it was a mess (it was just after xmas, so all he could get was pictures of various boxes) He took these without my permission, can he use them?

2007-02-24 06:21:05 · 23 answers · asked by Heather H 3 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

sadly my ex does have a shot, at the moment it's equal custody, saying that, I see the Health visitor and I'm the one that get's my son's Child Benefit. Reason the custody is changing is we live miles apart and my son is now 2 and should become settled. This is in the UK by the way.

2007-02-24 06:38:14 · update #1

for the info, my place is normally fine, the camera he used was on his phone. the reason that he's using this is because he has nothing else

2007-02-24 08:58:22 · update #2

23 answers

He might can, but I'll bet even Judge's houses are a mess after Christmas. They won't carry any weight in a court of law. Relax! If that's all he's got against you, you're "home free". Good Luck!!

2007-02-24 06:25:45 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0 0

I'm a guy.I too have pictures similar to the ones you mention,but taken over several years,logged and dated.And then some at intervals after my wife left.Should the need arise,I will be using them in court,and yes,they are admissable,they are relevant,they are important.
The question you should ask yourself is this.
Why did he come tooled up with a camera?
Is it just possible that he knew the place was going to be worth a picture,going on past evidence?

If the latter is the case,then you owe it to yourself and your child to do something about it,because,despite some of the flippant answers above,it does actually matter how you look after your home,and therefore yourself and your child-especially in the eyes of the law.No matter what a Judges house looks like,or anyone elses,its not them having a custody battle is it?

Think of the benefits too.Your friends will be inclined to visit more.Your family will be more supportive if they see you helping yourself.Ex's won't be able to get crafty snaps!

And those "fridge magnet- your friends will love you whatever" type answers above will prove meaningless in a court of law.
I'm guessing you already know this or you wouldn't be asking the question,so it might be a good idea to get some pics of your own,and keep the house looking good anyway.It certainly can't hurt can it?

However it goes,I just hope its good for the baby,as I'm sure you do too.
Good luck.I hope I havent offended you.

2007-02-24 08:42:23 · answer #2 · answered by longbow 2 · 0 0

Unfortunately yes. Try not to worry though, if you have a good attorney then he will probably find a way to keep them from being admitted if the judge even pays any attention to them at all. If the picture just show boxes and stuff like that the judge probably wont even be interested in them. The kind of things to be worried about in those picture would be things like trash being piled up, dirty dishes all over the house, dirty laundry piled up all over, your basic filth that is a detriment to you and your childs health. That is the kind of stuff the judge will pay attention to. Besides, custody battles are extremely expensive and if you have custody most likely you will be just fine. Your ex has to be very involved in you childs life to even have a shot at custody. By this I mean calling you child on a regular basis, visiting on a regular basis, and things like that. The best thing you can do is talk with your attorney or get one if you don't have one already. Good Luck.

2007-02-24 06:33:15 · answer #3 · answered by truckerman96 2 · 0 0

He will get absolutely NOWHERE with this - if he has a solicitor involved he would be told this in due course!

Three factors to consider here - ONE - he took the pictures without your consent in YOUR property - invasion of privacy.

TWO - Your child is in no danger and is being well looked after - so there is no problem

THREE - The laws have changed so much in recent years - what he hasn't taken into account is the fact that you are the main carer - In view of this he stands little chance of gaining custody!

It is highly unlikely that he will be given custody on the basis of a Christmas meltdown photo set!

2007-02-24 06:31:28 · answer #4 · answered by jamand 7 · 0 0

Don't worry, even if he does bring the photos up (I don't know if they are "admissable") what is a little mess. A professor I had in social work class said, "when you go into someone's house and it's a mess, ask yourself is it just messy or is it a hazard to the well being of those inside the house, some people are just messy. It doesn't mean their kids are not cared for. No one's house will pass the white glove test all the time." Unless you had dishes piled to the ceiling and dog poop everywhere, don't worry.

2007-02-24 06:27:58 · answer #5 · answered by mspicer0005 2 · 0 0

Sad as it seems, Child Custody anywhere, is the pits ! If the Court allowed such trite actions, you must have something negative about him that just isn't coming in clear because of all the emotions you're going through. Having an Attorney of belief in you helps, just make sure that He is good ! God Bless !!

2007-02-28 05:14:33 · answer #6 · answered by fuzzypetshop 4 · 0 0

Pictures of a few boxes will not make a difference. It is living in filth that will make a difference. If there were not lots of dirty dishes or trash. The people at court are normal people and will tell him that these pictures are not bad if they are not. If you had to sink fulls of spoiled food in dirty dishes though this would be another story.

2007-02-24 06:28:18 · answer #7 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0 0

do not worry, he will have to provide the dates of the photos so they will know it was just after christmas, and you will find that they will only be interested in the welfare of the child, and family courts are well aware of devious ex's and all their tricks, last friday 23/02/07 I was awarded custaday of my four kids and it was granted, (and I've still got tinsel strung over the mirror) I have now a russian wife, and my ex even tried to say that she was against her learning them russian, they saw this as an extra bonus for their education. so dont worry, they,ll know if the child is safe or not,

2007-02-24 07:22:22 · answer #8 · answered by fool4love 2 · 0 0

He can, I am sorry, you should never have let him come to your house. You can demonstrate by bringing pictures of how clean it is, or you can just say, It was right after christmas, We had all the boxes still, boxes aren't showing that your house is a mess, it is dirty dishes, unclean clothes, judges will understand some boxes and wrapping paper, especially if you have kids. Don't worry about it.

2007-02-24 06:26:00 · answer #9 · answered by Hawaiisweetie 3 · 1 0

It won't make any difference. In future don't let him in your house cause he's obviously searching for something to have on you so he can use it in court. He's a sad man and don't deserve custody. You should tell whoever is representing you what he did. I'm sure you'll be OK so don't let him worry you. Take care.

2007-02-24 06:50:40 · answer #10 · answered by whitney 4 · 0 0

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