i need someone to listen..?

Question

okay so imma make this as short as possible..

me and my dad havent had a relationship in many years because we cant see eye to eye.
he thinks im completely worthless and i'll never get anywhere in life..

well, my mom recently discovered that she doesnt have feelings for him anymore and she wants to seperate..*after all hes put her thru*
she confronted him yesterday (after a month of not saying a word to each other)(she wont even sleep in their room with him) and she told him ysterday how she feels..

he said as soon as he gets settled down with his job he'll find somewhere else to live..

even tho ive said i hate my dad many times, my heart is broken.

even tho i know when they arent together anymore our lives will be much more peaceful.

have i caused this?..
i feel like somethin is missin in my life and it hurts..

i havent spoke to him in SO LONG.
(and yes we do live in the same house together)

somebody relate?

Answer 1

No--you did not cause it. Apparently, NOBODY saw eye to eye with him. None of you are happy as things are....just think to yourself that all of you will be happier after it's over. It doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you human. We all want our homes to be peaceful & stress free, and yours WASN'T, but soon will be. Chin up, little girl...life is always gonna throw these curve balls at you---it's how you become stronger!

Answer 2

Whoa there kiddo. First of all, it is NOT your fault. Sometimes, couples just can't get along or grow apart. You are not worthless. Just do what you do normally (i know it's tough) and everything will be ok. I suppose couseling is out of the question for mom and dad, but you may want to seek some, if for no other reason just to vent and have an impartial ear.
Good Luck, and you will be ok.

Answer 3

This is not your fault, sometimes people grow apart adn it has nothing to do with the children. It is not too late to sit down and have a heart to heart with your dad about how you feel and how much it hurts you to see them end their relationship, but that you would still like to have a relationship with him.
He might be projecting his feelings of his own worthlessness on to you because he dosen't know how to deal with it, but that doesn't excuse him for making you feel that way. You are not the only one who has gone through this and you will make it through.

Answer 4

Its not your fault for the way your mom feels people just grow apart and feel they no longer have anything more in common and she probably has something else going on between her and your dad that you don't know about but you should at least try and make peace with your dad because he is the only one you will ever have.

Answer 5

maybe after he moves out....maybe he can become a better person and that will make him happy and then you 2 can have a realationship...its probably hard for him to relate if he is having problems with your mother. Furthermore.....are you doing anything thats making yor dad thinks you wont get anywhere if life. Do as best as you can and be a responsible person and make him eat his words....meanwhile be strong....it will be hard but you can do it....i dont know if you are a religious person or not but pray for your father,,,,even though you may be mad at him or have hate feelings toward him ...pray for him......good things come to those who wait.....good luck my dear....Peace and good luck

Answer 6

Hello friend. I can't "relate" but I will try to advice you.
1. what's b/w him and mum is nt your fault.
2. Pls try to TALK to him, so what if you dont see eye to eye, he is your dad. NOBODY in this world is ever gonna replace him. I lost my dad few years ago, we still miss him like crazy. HE WAS THE MAN WHO TAUGHT ME HOW TO WALK, dammit, even i used to fight with him, bt where is he now??? you are lucky you have your dad. plzzzzz try to meet him on some common ground.
3. pls dont take sides as far as mum and he are concerned. it wil not be fair to him.
4. can you read THE MESSAGE OF LOVE i am giving you? pls do. this world is full of wickedness, malice, evil let out loose. dont lose the people God gave you in your life. in the east, we give a lot of imp to relationships.
5. pls light a candle in front of the god you believe in. say this prayer WITH ALL YOUR HEART: i forgive everybody including myself, i am not guilty. oh, god! if i have done anything consciously or unconsciously against your wish, pls forgive me. i am nt guilty. i am a pure spirit.
6. pls try reading MANY LIVES MANY MASTERS by dr brian weiss, you will understand WHY the friction was caused b/w dad and you in the first place.
7. if u want, try to go in for mind relaxing activities like yoga, reiki or meditation.
god be with you...

Answer 7

When I was a child/young man, my father, used to physically abuse me for anything he felt was improper to him. I hated him. When he passed, It hurt, I fought it, but it hurt. Years later, I was successful and he never got to see what ended up happening to me. I believe he can see what I turned out to be, and that totally makes me feel good inside. Be patient, Life has a way of working things out. God Bless !!

Answer 8

i can....i understand what you are going through...it is never to late to start a relationship with him...try letting him know who you really are.Dont BE FAKEAROUND HIM....my dad was like that, cause im emo....punk rock basically. and he hates me.

Answer 9

omigosh no! don't blame yourself!!!! You've done nothing wrong. Your mom's decision to separate was just that- HER decision. I wish you luck with everything, i know this is hard.

Answer 10

wasnt your fault i been through this before this is life