Great wine is fine, but a whiskeys quicker
Suicide is slower when drinking liquor
Drown your drink demons with a full bottle
But your demons are there fighting full throttle
Knocking on the passing doors, awaking dead
Stumble in wondering when you’re alone
So I make my bed. Rest my drunken head.
Nights just a blur so I lie there and moan
On the next morning I am feeling rough
I Guess the night before must have been tough
Feeling sick as I slumped off the sofa
Then have a flash back, I hired a shofer
People drink their silly self too death why?
Suicide by drinking makes you stop thinking!
Plz read more of my poems
2007-02-24 04:58:22 · 11 answers · asked by Katja ie tattybow 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Books & Authors
I like this poem better than the one that left you bleeding on the floor of your classroom! But I agree with some of the others that thirteen is a bit young to have had the experiences you write about. Also using even a part of someone elses writing within your poem is pagarism. Writing about things you know usually results in better writing. Especially for a new writer.
2007-02-24 05:06:42 · answer #1 · answered by babydoll 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gingerpeachy. That guy is certified retard. They have even traced him to the mental hospital that he is based in. There was an article about it on the net a few months ago. Not surprising someone as detached from reality as him is your bum-chum, hero. Why do you continue to behave in such a negative way.?Why come to the same girl over and over again if you hate her poetry so? Why not just ignore her stuff? That's what a adult would do. You can't can you? Your obsessed with abusing people. She's not the only one you have mistreated in this way. You are truly a pathetic coward.
And the thing which annoys the most is that you criticise others for the things you do yourself. You report people all the time and then whine when some reports you for foul and abusive language. You criticise people for misspellings, but misspell yourself. You are a mindless HYPOCRITE and your time here is seriously running out.
Long poem by your standards Tattybow. Length can allow for a greater exploration of your theme!
2007-02-24 14:17:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You have a talent for rhyming and rhythm, definitely.
But I have to say this seems more like a kids' poem - unless that was the intention, try chopping it up a bit and making it less straightforward. At the moment it's more like a rap.
2007-02-24 13:08:03 · answer #3 · answered by Hannah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its Amazing !
Weldone , Its Verry Demonic and makes you think !
personaly id ate it 100% !
^_^
ill go read some more of ures now =P
2007-02-24 13:05:43 · answer #4 · answered by Shadow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awesome! This is an amazing poem, you obviously have a unique talent for writing. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
2007-02-24 15:04:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think the poem is little bit scary. But still you can write girl. Hip Hip,,,,hurraaaay.
2007-02-24 13:10:07 · answer #6 · answered by Salaama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
fella the poem is really good.......10 on 10 for your work...continue writing good poems
2007-02-24 13:06:03 · answer #7 · answered by sam 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have always loved that poem.
2007-02-24 13:01:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is thee worst poem ever. never again, just, just quit while ur behind
2007-02-24 13:03:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes good, makes me glad that i dont drink anymore
2007-02-24 13:04:15 · answer #10 · answered by tra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋