i don't consider them as my friends anymore.. is this right?

Question

before i'm happy being with them, i can stay up all night just to be with them. but now, things have changed. i started to feel that they're laughing at my back, and when im around it seems im invisible to them. i try to convince myself that its just me, im just paranoid but then again, when day comes and i see them, i can see obviously what are they doing to me. i told my boyfriend about these things, and he got so angry at them. he told me that eversince he met me, he doesn't like them, he can see their dirty attitudes which i cant see before. and now afterall what i have done for them, this is what i've got. now i don't consider them as my friends anymore. is this right?

i didn't do anything to them. im always the same eversince i've met them. i hate them for being that way.

Answer 1

Hi there
I feel for you as this sort of thing has happened to me when I was young.
It is a sad thing when someone brings you into a group only to have someone who is jealous of you sabotage you within that group. Usually, this is the 'leader' of the group, the one person everyone wants to be accepted by. Receive approval from.
I really don't know if what you are experiencing is real or not so to answer your question would be a failure on my part.
If there is someone in that group of friends who you feel very close to and feel you can talk to, this might be the best thing to do.
Tell them what is happening and that what is happening is hurting you. Give examples but don't blame anyone. Ask them to stop if it does involve them. And make your judgement from their response. If they are a true friend, they will stop ignoring you, provide you with an explanation and/or things will change. If they write off your concerns as your imagination or ignor your feelings altogether then I think you may need to seek out new friends.
A true friend will want to make it better for you. And if there is a problem, this offers them the opportunity to talk to you about it so that it can be worked out somehow.
Making a judgement call without looking into the problem may mean losing out on one or more good friendships.
People don't always have the knowledge to bring something up that's bothering them. Peer pressure, as I'm sure you know, can be overwhelming. Be gentle in your approach if you are interested in maintaining those friendships but don't let them treat you badly either.
I wish you lots of luck. I know that it can really be hard to deal with things like this.
I think the worst thing you can do is just allow them to be mean to you. You owe it to yourself to seek out the answers to the questions that you have. If you don't, you might regret it more than learning that your suspicions are correct. Ignoring the problem is an invitation for them to continue to mistreat you.
Remember, there is always someone willing to hurt someone else but there are always others to help you move through that hurt - people who really do care.
Good luck.

Answer 2

Every friendship has its high and low period, which is more like a spinning wheel...You may think that it's not worthy having them as your friends at the moment, but the meaning behind all this is just that you guys should be taking a breather...This is the time where you should reflect what you guys have been through and you better start pondering that true friends won't do what your friends are doing to you now...Take some time off to see what will happen, and if by that time things still haven't changed or worsened, than those people are never meant or never worth to be your friends...

Answer 3

I understand how you feel. I've been there, and I've also been in situations where I took my friends' behavior TOO personally. Girls will be girls, and many girls catch attitudes to try and promote their "coolness" sometimes and just feel better about themselves by putting others down. Don't let it get to you too much. Your friends are not being nice, but I bet any of those girls would act the same way to any one of your other friends if they were presented the opportunity. See, it's hard to admit, but girls can be nasty and its just some girls' way of dealing with life. You have to realize that the girls are probably not attacking just you, they probably do it all the time to other girls. It will pass, just let them know you are not weaker than them. Don't encourage their behavior by overreacting. Keep your cool and stay at a distance for a little while and they'll start missing you and come back around.

Answer 4

I agree that they don't seem like your friends anymore. They are friends you Don't need*
Your boyfriend sees now , that these girls aren't the nice girls you first met/knew.
Just leave them in the wind...and keep stepping forward* You'll Meet Better Friends.....people who care about what you have to say..Respect you* not backstab you*

Answer 5

I can sympathize. My two best friends started dating, and what used to be the three musketeers is now romeo, juliet, and the nurse. We're not friends anymore because i'm no one's third wheel, and i'm sure you aren't either, Ditch em and move on, they're not worth your pain

Answer 6

The reason they might be talking about you behind your back is because they might feel like you abandonded them to be with your boyfriend. They feel like they are not as important as they used to be. They are just jealous and not good friends.

Answer 7

ask them why they are acting like that , they might be jealous or they might just be caught up in there little mean world if they dont change i would not consider them friends anymore move forward with your life and make new friends

Answer 8

only one question:

does it make you happier/ makes you feel good about yourself
then its right else. think again is this what you really worth.
the fiends or friends or whatever you call them ?
you are worth much more so dont bother !

Answer 9

Trust your gut instinct-- YES it is right! I would just stick with the bf. He obviously cares for you more than your 'friends' do..

Answer 10

If that is how you feel....how can THAT be wrong? Good Luck!