I don't know how to live my own life. Please help.?

Question

I felt extremely terrifying and collapsed when I left my ex-husband of 10 years. I didn't know how to live on after that...or my life without him. I met someone else soon enough after that. We have been together for almost 2 years. My independence on him is even stronger. Now that I'm physically apart from him, but I must have constant contact with him, at least once in 1-2 hours or so. I know that my attachment to him is too strong to the stage that I don't know how to live my own life even when I'm physically apart from him now, I must know where he is and what he is doing all the time. Now that I've found a job here since 2 mths ago, but I just kept feeling like going back to be with him. He told me that he feels the pressures from me, he needs his own space & time. And if I continue this way, he cannot continue to be with me anymore. I know that I'm in serious trouble...what are the good suggestions to encouter this problem.

Answer 1

This sounds serious enough for counselling, to me. Sooner or later you will have to find out what is the cause of your need to cling to a man, or it will ruin your life. Try thinking about the person that you are, write down a list of good things about yourself. Think about what you like and dislike, back to when you were a child. Why do you feel that you need to be with him, what are you afraid will happen if you are alone? Think about what ambitions you had in the past, and pick something to strive for. Do a course to get qualified and work towards your goals. Build a life of your own, you deserve it. Clinging to a man will drive him away. Best wishes.

Answer 2

You're not in any trouble, just disarray. My Aunt left my ex-uncle and barely made it through life. Self help books may assist the issue, but this is a deal where going and finding ways to be more independent may help more. Take some cooking, exercise, or art classes and remind yourself that before all else your are a woman and a human being. Realize if who ever means this much to you then you must let space and life come between now and then in order to keep the individual nature of him and you alive. You shouldn't be worried, just try to relax and talk to him or someone who can help.

Answer 3

they could't be dependant on you consistently and someway you will get them to attain this. i don't understand in the journey that your mom's petrified of looking after your father on her very own or what yet while it quite is the case then you definitely could advise to her that there are such somewhat some methods she gets help while not having you to do it given which you have your man or woman desires to shelter and could't be there each and every of the time. There are CNA's that artwork in residences, vocational nurses, homestead care aides, such somewhat some extra.. so there's no reason of you to get caught doing each and every of the artwork. you are able to advise those on your mom and help her locate one, and tell her which you would be there once you are able to, yet once you won't be in a position to that she could have help. Telling you that your father is extra important than residing your existence is in simple terms incorrect. i understand he's dealing with some thing terrible yet it quite isn't any reason of you to get caught looking after him. they won't % a stranger in the homestead yet you already know what.. it quite is too undesirable! that they had could get one in any case in case you ever desperate to pass out. you are able to stay your existence, get a job, get a companion and be happy. You should be happy and that i without a doubt wish you're taking this suggestion and get the possibility to be. Take care.

Answer 4

any sort of depression can be tide over by faith in GOD and sincere prayer.

Your prayer is from your heart. Further You must have to understood the fact that God is present in our heart. This can be realised in meditation. Further we are the creation of our own destiny. As per Hindu sacred religion, we carry all good and bad deeds life after life. There is no end unless we pray for unification of self with the divineliness.
Hence there is always a possible way to complete mergence with God in this life by a simple and wonderful meditation

Answer 5

My first thought is 'what a scary position to be in'. You have obviously placed all of your confidence in this man. He is right, you could lose him if you do not find a way to stand in your own shoes. It is kinda like dancing...you are standing on his feet. It limits him and keeps you from learning to have fun. Find something that you want to pursue, go back to school, or learn a new hobby, or get a new girl friend to hang with to get your mind off him. Nothing is more attractive than a self sufficient woman.

Answer 6

Learn how to find your centre of consciousness, through practising the techniques to be found at: http://www.relax7.com/7.php and the 2 easily learned ones in the blogs of Shan Eris on "tackling depression" at: www.myspace.com Read all 6. Practice them whenever you feel the need to be with him. Start now.

Answer 7

You need to take a time out on relationships right now and be alone for a while so that you can learn to live with yourself. If you keep being so dependent on others their not going to be with you or around you. You're not married anymore so stop it.

Answer 8

try not having someone to love. or the feeling that you wont ever find one because you had a girlfriend.

and for your question: i dont know
id still kill for problems of your type, better to have loved than never to have loved at all

Answer 9

Go for Seaside

Answer 10

Consolt a non-directional coach and counsellor. They will help you gain direction and help you get release to walk your own path.