My boyfriend just told me that he has been smoking weed for a couple of months, but quited a few months ago. I'm shocked to find out; I can't believe he didn't tell me while he was doing it. Why didn't he tell me?
2007-02-23 19:22:21 · 10 answers · asked by Deesa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm so dissapointed in him... I just can't trust him anymore. If he didn't tell me about the weed, there may be other things he never told me about... I don't know.. Am I just overreacting? We've been together 3 years, we have been a great couple. There are ups and downs, but we always manage to bounce right back. But now I'm having doubts. I never even touch drugs, and I even stopped drinking... While he is doing drugs. I know for sure he has quite now, but still... Should I let it go? Am I overreacting?
2007-02-23 19:22:29 · update #1
I think you are overreacting. He has friends, he tried something new, he didn't like it and stopped doing it. It's over. If he loved it and wanted to make it a part of his life (and your life) and do it in the house, that would be a different story, because then it would affect you. I mean, you didn't even notice that he was high, so it could not have impacted your life very much. If you start down the road of "You need to tell me everything" then you are being distrustful and changing the dynamic and rules of the relationship.
I think that if a relationship is going to last (particularly through the 20s) you need to trust your partner to make smart decisions as you go down life's many avenues - both as a couple and as individuals. People are gonna try stuff and our partner may not agree with our choices, but as long as the choice is not adversely affecting the partner, it isn't really their business. That goes the same for the way we handle our friends and family, our bosses, what we eat, how well we take care of ourselves, etc.
Peace!
2007-02-23 19:31:26 · answer #1 · answered by carole 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand Its hard to trust someone who has been able to hide something from you for some time. However he has shared it with you now, and he really didnt have to. I would appreciate his honesty now without regarding his dishonesty then, you do that by talking to him about it. i wouldnt be so quick to judge he was probably ashamed of it, and if he was, then now hes over the whole drug scene and ready to move on. If it bothers you then you wont be able to let it go so, if you want to continue having him in your life than just discuss with him how all of this may have hurt you.
2007-02-24 03:45:18 · answer #2 · answered by pallas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not overreacting, trust is a very important part of a relationship, I think he knew you would not have approved of him smoking weed and that is why he didn't tell you. Don't believe he quit either, that is also not true. He is telling you that so that it will minimize the severity of the deed. Soon he will be telling you that smoking weed is not that bad and that it serves some medicinal purposes. Another crook!
2007-02-24 03:30:45 · answer #3 · answered by 1TON 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
He was probably afraid of your reaction. Smoking pot affects people in different ways. Some people can't handle it, others enjoy it like a glass of wine.
Smoking pot isn't necessarily a bad thing, but there really should be no secrets between the 2 of you. Talk about it and find out how he feels about pot. To many people it's no big deal.
2007-02-24 03:29:01 · answer #4 · answered by Mike J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Better late than never watch this video theinterviewwithgod.com this will enlighten you and help u in more ways than u can imagine and also on this question...it's only less than 3 min of ur life...enjoy... :)
2007-02-24 03:31:27 · answer #5 · answered by jaysonmgs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Me and my ex had the same kinda problem we broke up because of it... if u really love and care about him then give him another chance just asure him its ok 2 tell u things. but if u really feel like its a big deal then u should talk 2 him about it.
2007-02-24 03:31:00 · answer #6 · answered by Kaia.R 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
uhmm you just said that he told you that he was smoking weed and in the next sentance you said oh im shocked i cant believe he didnt tell me. you should trust him .
2007-02-24 03:26:36 · answer #7 · answered by MADLYNN 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Looks like he made a mistake reaching out to you and confiding in you. All your gonna do now is punish him for it? He deserves better then you. Do him a favor and dump him.
2007-02-24 03:28:22 · answer #8 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes a guy won't reveal all his secrets especially when he know that when he tells it will hurt you.
2007-02-24 03:31:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl...relax!! It's only weed...not a drug!!!
2007-02-24 03:25:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋