i have been molested several times by a family member, and i have been really depressed and not trusting lately. the last time it happened was over the summer, and its still bothering me. am i over reacting...or is this normal? i just feel really stupid for lettign it affect me so much adn for so long. so, am i being stupid or is this normal? thank you.
2007-02-23 18:35:04 · 29 answers · asked by L 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
he did nto brush my knee, he fully assulted me--he did as he plesed with my body.
2007-02-23 18:45:37 · update #1
i dont want you to tell me to go tell someone, because i cant--im just wondering if i should be over it by now
2007-02-23 18:48:10 · update #2
i said he did NOT just brush me knee, sorry for confusion.
2007-02-23 18:49:55 · update #3
i am that weak.
2007-02-23 19:30:12 · update #4
You are NOT over reacting! Contact the authorities or a family member immediately!
2007-02-23 18:39:23 · answer #1 · answered by The Voice of Reason 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Over reacting? Not likely. Unfortunately it will most likely always bother you. Especially if you feel that you can't talk about it. Its betrayal plain and simple. And the feelings that come with having it happen are the same that keep you from telling ppl. And, that is usually what they (molesters) are counting on. What you end up doing to fix or stop it is in your hands, and nobody can make that call for you. Im not sure how old you are, but look around, is it just you? Or is there a chance that you aren't the only one being abused? I never said a word.. until I realized that by keeping quiet becuase I was humiliated was not only protecting him, but put other girls, more importantly my baby sister in the same position. You will find ppl to talk to, it happens to more than you know or realize. When you can talk to someone about it, and can make it stop, it will get better. Until then... ?
2007-02-24 18:14:13 · answer #2 · answered by bbydrms2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not overreacting and no you shouldn't be over it. Truth is you will never be over it. You are angry and you have a right to be and while I understand you don't want to tell anyone, the longer you keep the secret, the longer the secret has control of you. There are teenlines and stuff you can call to talk anonymously, but man you need to talk.
Also avoid this family member? One thing you need to realize though, is if they are molesting you, they may be molesting others in your family....cousins, nieces, nephews, brothers, sisters.
I was molested for many years and kept my mouth shut. As an adult, my body does not handle stress well. I get real sick a whole lot. Most of my doctors will tell you, it is because I thought I should have gotten over it, not held a grudge, and just let it go. In fact for many year I chose to forget it and it has tore my body up beyond repair.
Find somebody to help you diffuse this bomb. But no, molestation, you just don't get over
2007-02-24 07:11:12 · answer #3 · answered by ggirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After reading some of your previous questions I suggest that you go to the police and a councillor. You need to sort out your present situation in order to get your life under control. If you continue the way you are going and just keep hoping that you will forget you may end up a lot worse off then you already are. Maybe going to someone is difficult for you to do but you have to for your own sake. Talk to someone on the Samaritans Internet site if you want some help getting through this to start with.
2007-02-24 03:22:42 · answer #4 · answered by SR13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been through exactly the same situation, but i didn't realise it at the time i thought it was normal, you have knowledge on your side, if he is doing this to you and you are aware what can he get away with with someone younger and less aware than you, i know it is really really hard but forget about yourself think about other children in the same street, same family and even the same house as this person if you cant tell the authorities for you and you are strong enough to fend and look after yourself do it for the five year old or three year old or the child that is not even born yet, also do it for your own well being, believe me when i say that no matter how long this goes on for , you will be trying to get over this for longer in your life, the sooner it stops the sooner you can start living your own life and get over this bad time. start now not later
thinking of you xxx
2007-02-27 15:40:03 · answer #5 · answered by vici 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not being stupid and yes the feelings you have are perfectly normal. The fact that it happened last summer should tell you that these feelings aren't gonna go go away anytime soon. You do need to talk to someone and when you do it will help you. This person needs to be held accountable for what he did to you and it will be hard but it will help you to recover. Molestation changes you forever because you were violated but you can move on deal with it.You can not do this alone.
2007-02-24 09:22:02 · answer #6 · answered by breezy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from presonal experiance I completely understand how you are feeling. I went to the police and children's adie was involved. I was blamed for being curious. A 4 year old is in no way curious enough about little boys to have sex. It happened repeatedly over 9 years to me and only stopped at 12 because he was running the risk of getting me pregnant and someone finding out. I did evnetually get psychiatric help as I was left with a major depressive disorder, exagerated shyness, trust issues big time and to top it all off someone started spreading stories that I was inbred and that I was having sex with my cousin, I was in grade 8 at that time. I am now almost 26, married and we have a son together. I don't totally trust my husband and he knows it, but it still stems from the abuse. I refuse to do certain things for my husband, not because I don't love him but because it was something I was forced to do by my cousin. I am still not over it. It is not something to just get over. Most people who have experienced this really do need some sort of psychiatric help, I was going weekly until my shrink retired. Maybe you should try talking to a medical professional and see if it works for you, I didn't want to and I didn't for years, in fact it wasn't until I left high school that I started seeing a shrink.
No, I don't believe that you are over reacting, but I do think that you will benefit from speaking to someone. You may need medication for the depression, or talking might help you if it not chemically caused depression.
2007-02-24 03:01:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Someone is playing on the fact that they KNOW you will not report it - which is exactly what is happening.
Nobody deserves to be molested. This sounds like a serious sexual assault.
If you feel that you cannot confide in a family member, then just blurt it out to a grown-up friend, a teacher or the like. They should report it for you, and you need not feel guilty.
But you need to act, and act soon. You might not be the only one suffering from this person, and the sooner they are stopped, the better.
2007-02-24 04:21:21 · answer #8 · answered by Bunts 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You must get help! nobody has the right to hurt you and do things to you which you do not want. If you cannot talk to somebody about what has happend the ring a help line if you are a young person ring childline .it is anonymous and it will help to talk to somebody who doesn; t know you.Maybe you can put things that have happened in a letter and give it to somebody you can trust.But you must be strong and try and let it not happen again by maybe staying allways away from that person and nver be alone with this bad human being.If you are being hurt maybe it is happening to somebody else also so think very hard about getting help.Good luck
2007-02-24 09:52:24 · answer #9 · answered by tootsie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not over reacting. I will always bother you if you dont get help now. Its not normal to be molested. It is normal to be depressed over it and it will most likely get worse. I know you said you dont want to report it but you really should. That is the only way you are going to get better. And remember it is not your fault. Some people may try to blame it on you, but just remember you didnt make this person do that to you.
2007-02-24 04:58:48 · answer #10 · answered by cynthia_0516 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not being smart to hold this in! You are now enabling this horrible person for doing these horrible things to you....You are depressed because you haven't take any actions,..and are afraid of the things that "might" happen...if you tell.
You need to see a doctor..now! You need to tell the police about this, or a doctor or teacher...some adult that you can trust!..if you cannot tell your parents..or family...This is NOT a "healthy" thing for you to "hold" it in...it will only affect you later...Please, please, please, get some help....you don't have to be alone in this.....and you aren't.....
(a friend of mine was molested by her own father..and she stood up to him in a court of law..and put him away in prison...I have always long admired her...she just deals with her issues..and she said, that she has had no regrets...her father was a slime ball!)
I highly admire people like this...they are heroes to me! I wish you the best...and I hope that you follow thru on this...because I wouldn't want your future to be further ruined by this horrible "Beast" that is already wrecking your life,and causing havok...on what should be a lovely life for you....!!!!!!!
I wish, pray and hope, many blessings of courage for you!
I hope that "the truth comes out..and you will be set free!!'
and That this awful person, pays for what they took from you!!!
2007-02-24 03:31:27 · answer #11 · answered by Anne99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋