should every child hate their stepmother?

Question

first off,
she put me on slim-fast when i was like...8 or so.
becasue she wanted us to wear the same clothes forever.

AND!
she wanted me to call her "mommy" when i first met her.

another thing is that,
i was molested for 6 or 8 years by her son.
[i was 4 1/2-5 when it started, he was 12-13]
i always thought she knew about it all along.

should i hate her for the things shes done?

Answer 1

ONly if she has a tramp stamp chex on her lower back and see if she has one if she does that means she ahs been with many men

Answer 2

No it Will only hurt you more then you've already been hurt .You've been through so much , & it's probebly burning inside of you . You need to move on & forgive all of them . They are the losers never having the friend ship they could have had with you .
If she does knows what her son did ,admitteding it to you or others is some thing she might not be able do . If so , she is living in a pain you'll never know .
She made a lot of mistakes & now she has to live with it .
I hope even though you might not be able to ever really feel close to her , you won't hate her . She might hate herself & what her son did more then you ever could .
You can choose to live for now or in the past . Being that the past was painful , letting it go & moving on with out hate in your heart will be a blessing to your future happyness .

You didn't say if he is still in the same house with you or if he is molesting you any more . You need to talk to some one that can help you . Tell your father & tell you step mother , They need to know .He may be molesting others . You could save another child from going through what you went through . Don't be surpiised if she says you lieing .It's going to be hard on her .
Try to show her kindness & love . After all a son that does what he did is not a respectful or loving son
I wish you well & much happyness
God Bless You always ..

Answer 3

Although I was never molested, I do have a step parent and at times it sucks. He's mean to me, he picks on me, but there are some good times. He'll make tiny kind gestures, but it doesn't dissolve the hate. Please speak to an adult you trust about the molestation. (If you live in Canada feel free to call Kids Help Phone [phone] They'll be able to give you the guidance you need) As you grow older, you'll find that the hate will subside, but just talk with someone you trust and you'll be able to overcome it. You seem like a strong person.

Good luck.

Answer 4

WOW...everyone has a right to their feelings and I believe that you should right a long, long letter stating the feelings that you have and why you have those feelings. seeing it on paper might help. And when you are ready I would share it with her. If she gets mad so what, if she screams so what, if she curses, so what at least you have cleared you head about what is going on. HATE is such a strong word and, I really do not believe that you hate her you just hated her actions toward you and the actions of her son toward you. Turn your hate into motivation. After you say whatever you have to say forgive her I know it takes time and easier said then, done but once you do this I guarantee that you will feel better and that she will probably feel bad. After you have said your peace kill her with kindness. That's what really makes it suck, when you treat somebody wrong and they forgive you and they start treating you so nice that makes them feel so bad.

Answer 5

Hating anyone is not right. She has issues, and so does her son, they need help immediately. I feel for you for your situation, but the past is the past and no good can come of holding a grudge or hating anyone. They will have to live with what they did the rest of their lives. Where was your dad when all this was going on? Get some counseling if you need to talk about it to put it behind you but don't let it ruin the rest of your life. Good luck to you.

Answer 6

I love my step mom to death and if anything ever happened to her I would be so sad, but for me to gain her trust takes a while. It took me a few months to gain her trust. I know that she propbley would like me to call her mom, but I sat down and talked to her about calmly. I told her that I was not ready to call another woman mom and probley would not be ready. She told me that it was ok. My step mom does like me to wear nice clothes, but I think that I should have my unique style..... so should you. I was never molested so IDK anything in that field except that she may have never knew what her son was doing to you.

I suggest that you ask your step mom if just the two of you can go out for a nice dinner every week and talk about things.... life, school, crushes..... tell her how you feel about your own unique style and how calling her mother right away made you feel uncomfrotable. After that talk to her in private about her son so that something can be done because she needs to know. If she wont listen then talk to your father.

I hope that this is very helpful.

Answer 7

Dorian is quite unusual for a boy, but isn't horrible. It is a boys name, but you get idiots like poster number one thinking you're giving your son a girls name. I like Dorian Innis Vali reminds me of Frankie Vali mainly because I went to see the west-end show Jersey Boys before Xmas. I think it sounds a bit like Valley too, but maybe that depends on your accent? Karsten looks mispelt, is it caster like the sugar or Carter? I don't like it. Carl would be better! Love Arabella. I think that would be a great choice. Also if you're in the UK I think Eisa and Iracebeth would be pronounced wrong. Edit: Opps I forgot to answer the question; I would ignore her comment and pick the name and simply say "this is the name we've decided on" Once the baby comes, its a whole different thing. Change the subject if she brings it up, saying Me and hubby will decided, thanks we don't need any help.

Answer 8

She sounds pretty shallow. And does she REALLY know about that molestation? Because if she does you could get her in trouble with the law, not to mention your stepbrother getting in trouble. Hate is strong. You should never have had to call her mommy and putting you on slimfast was just sick. Turn her into child protective services,

Answer 9

wow tht is really bad u should totally be bad at her and urself u should of told someone about tht rite when it happended even if u thought someone knew or not. and you should have the right to tell her that you dont want to go on slim-fast because you want to stay the way u r. and last if you dont feel comfortable calling her mom then dont really cause i no i wouldnt because she didn't give birth to me and i have a real mom soo it is ur descion

Answer 10

You seem to have a brittle relation ship with ur step mother. You areprobably confused right now but you cant ask other people whether you should hate her or not. You know in your heart of hearts the answer.

Answer 11

Hate can never solve problems. Just be careful at all times. Live your life normally, and concentrate on schooling. Good grade will lead you to good college, good college leads you to good job. Soon enough you'll have a house of your own and wouldn't have to stay close to anybody you don't like.