How do you get your 5 year old to do chores. My daughter will not pick up anything.?

Question

I have tried chores at age 4 and age 5 but nothing. I have tried to bribe, punish and nothing. I cant seem to find a way to get her to help out. She will get out toys to play with and wont pick them up and put them back. She always has an excuse. I have even asked days in a row and she wont pick anything up. A reward system doesnt help. I am lost please help. I am due to have a baby in June and need her help cause I am on bed rest.

Answer 1

What I did once in awhile with my children related to not helping to pick up after themselves was I would pick up EVERYTHING that belonged to them and wasn't where it was supposed to be after asking them to pick stuff up, shoes, books, clothes, toys, etc. , put it all in big plastic trash bags, lock it up in the garage and leave it all there for a month. No matter what. I had to do it once three days in a row. Then, I would bring out only one item a day after a month had passed. This really worked. I even did this once with school books. They got the message. Remember, anytime children who share your home with you reduce you to nagging or pleading or otherwise exhausting yourself, they don't deserve your patience.

Answer 2

my daughter is 6 will be seven she has been doing chores since she was 4 she seperates her laundry then loads the machine (only her stuff) she carpet sweeps her room,makes her bed (sometimes) picks up all the stray papers around the house, and take the garbage with her in the morning when she goes to the bus with her dad. did this come overnight?? no it came bit by bit i just remind her that she is helping mommy out this is her job we all live as a family i say do i complain when i have to get u ready 4 school in the morning?? or when i have to cook u food?? no i just do it because i dont want u to be hungry. so i need u to help me with the house so it wont be dirty she does it and i kiss her and thank her 4 her help try this it may work but be consistant. once my daughter would not pick up her toys, im sad to say i bagged them all up in front of her in a big garbage bag and threw them away outside in front of her, boy she screamed and she cried and all i said was "the next time i ask u to pick them up you will" i called her dad and told him 2 put them in the garage but she did not see them for 2 months, and i did not buy her any more because i reminded her of the mess they made. guess what?? i dont have a toy problem any more

Answer 3

If she doesn't pick up the toy the first time you ask her to (and give her a time limit, like within 10 minutes) you take away the toy. That's it. Maybe give her a way to get it back after a week or so, like doing an extra chore that wouldn't be one of her regular responsibilities, as taking it away permanently may be a little harsh.

Taking away TV privileges always worked pretty well for me, too.

Answer 4

It has been a long time since I had a 4 or 5 year old around the house. But the principle remains the same YOU ARE THE MOM. When she is asked to pick up the toys and she doesn't, you pick them up and discard them. They can go in the actual trash or to a charity. When she sees you mean business, she will get the message.

Answer 5

Try employing your husband or another adult figure if you have one, to act as a role model. Have them play games to see who can pick up toys the fastest. That coupled with a reward system should work. She will learn to do them on her own as she grows older. Buy a few sheets of star stickers or stickers with cute animals and put them on a chart so she can see a tangible result of her work. As she reaches a target amount of stickers, you can reward her with an ice cream outing or other some such prize.

Answer 6

Just sit her down and have a talk with her, u may think that a 5 year old is too young to understand, but they r smarter than u think. C she's noticed that mom isn't gonna actually do anything to me or take away my stuff for long periods of time so she doesn't listen to wat u say!!! By the way every kid loves money/candy start given her allowance. Doesn't have to b something big just mayb 5 dollars a week. Or u kno how they do that lil thing when they want something, well so and so has one y can't i have one, say WELL I BET SO AND SO helps her mommy around the house


IF NONE OF THAT WORKS JUST BEAT HER, IT MAY SOUND LIKE A HORRIBLE THING TO DO, BUT SHE'LL START LISTENING TO U. GOOD LUCK!!!

BY the way, WATCH AMERICAN IDOL & VOTE 4 STEPHANIE EDWARDS!!!

Answer 7

If she can't pick anything up start pitching her stuff in a garbage bag=don't give into her-when she starts to help give em back sooner or later she won't have her favorite things to play with and she'll start to want them back-really don't know what else to say I have 3 kids ages 5, 3, and 1 and i've never had that problem

Answer 8

She won't pick them up because you never made her pick them up - you probably picked them up for her all of the time - so why should she do it......................
Take priviliges away from her until she learns to pick up after herself.
Make out a chart and everytime she accomplishes a chore, give her a star - then tell her after she receives 10-20 stars, you will give her a priviliege back.
Up until now, she's never had a reason to do anything because you've done it all for her.
You need to step up to the plate and be the parent!
This may be bad timing but you won't get any help from her now unless your husband does the job you should've done before this current pregnancy.
Children need boundaries, discipline and direction; when you do things for them - then they never learn to do it themselves.

Answer 9

Start throwing things away that are left out. She'll learn very quickly. (You could also pretend you are throwing something away and then after she starts picking up things it might reaapear later on down the road.) You can make a rule, "if I have to pick it up then its mine" or "if I pick it up its going in the garbage" and then you can stash it somewhere. You would be surprised how quickly they learn. After she loses the first toy she will never leave anyhting laying around again.

Answer 10

We started when the children were much younger--it was part of the daily routine: Put the toys away, eat dinner, take bath, go to bed. It will take more time and patience now that your children are nearly school age.