Why Don't Mothers Teach Their Sons to Be Good Fathers and Husbands?

Question

I have always tended to think that most men don't respect women the way they should and often use these women for sex and fun, rather than treat women as equals to be won and validated.

If women are upset with this, why don't mothers tell their sons how to be good people and good husbands. I think that it would help things.

In an ideal world, men should teach their sons to be good in this way, but they probably used women too and don't see anything morally wrong with those actions.

If women care about themselves or other women, they should not depend on the fathers.

Answer 1

I COMPLETELY AGREE. I HAVE 2 SONS AND I AM A SINGLE MOTHER. I HAVE A CHILD ON THE WAY OH AND YEP YOU GUESSED IT, STILL SINGLE! 3 FATHERS AND NONE OF THEIR MOM'S REALLY EVER SHOWED CONCERN AS TO HOW THEY ACTED TOWARDS THE MOTHER OF THEIR CHILDREN AS WELL AS TOWARDS THIER CHILDREN. I HAVE STRUGGLED WITH THIS ISSUE AND I JUST DON'T GET IT. THE CLOSEST IDEA TO SOME TRUTH I FEEL IS, ADMITTING FAULT IS THE HARDEST THING TO DO. WELL IF YOUR A MOM THEN YOU KNOW SAYING OR AGREEING TO NEGETIVITY ABOUT YOUR CHILD IS JUST MERELY IMPOSSIBLE. SO IN RESPECTS TO THE HURT AND PAIN I HAVE INDURED I HAVE DEDICATED MY SELF TO TEACHING MY BOY'S AND YES MY DAUGHTER THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF RESPECT AND RESPECTING OTHERS. WITH CONSIDERATION OF OTHERS OPINIONS, CRITICISMS AND WITH HEART FOR THEM AS WELL. MY CHILDREN MAY NOT DO EXACTLY WHATS RIGHT BUT INSTILLING GOOD MORALS NOW WILL HOPEFULLY CHANGE THE FUTURE FOR OUR DAUGHTERS AND OUR GRANDCHILDREN. I PROMISE THAT COME HELL OR HIH WATER MY BOY'S WILL BE THERE FOR THERE WIFES EMOTIONALLY FINANCIALLY AND SPIRITUALLY IF I HAVE TO STAND BEHIND THEM WITH A SHOTGUN. MY BOYS ARE ALREADY SAYING THAT SCHOOL, COLLEGE, GOOD JOB, HOME AND MARRIAGE THE WAY IT SHOULD BE THEY MAY BE 7 AND 6 YEARS OLD BUT THEY ARE BEING PROGRAMED BY ME. I REFUSE TO NOT STOP THIS CYCLE. I EVEN TEACH THEM ABOUT SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE AND HOW IT IS WRONG. THEY KNOW MOMMY MADE A MISTAKE AND EVEN THOUGH IT GAVE ME THREE WONDERFUL BLESSINGS, I FEEL WRONG. EVERYTIME I CAN'T GIVE THEM A TOY OR WE DON'T GET THINGS THAT OTHERS DO I USE IT TO THE ADVANTAGE OF HE FUTURE BY SAYING HAD I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE WE WOULD PROBABLY BE ABLE TO HAVE OR DO THOSE THINGS. NO NOT CONTRADICTIVE OR CONFUSSING NOT WHEN YOU TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO SEE OTHERS MISTAKES AND LEARN FROM THEM. FEEL ME! ALL IT TAKES IS PEOPLE LIKE US TO STOP THE CYCLE. YEAH WE MAY HAVE SUFFERED BUT WHY DO OUR DAUGHTERS HAVE TO? MOM'S GET IT TOGETHER!

Answer 2

SOME mother's do, however the first role model a boy has in his life is his father, if a son sees his father treating his mother disrespectfully then the son is going to grow up thinking this is the way a MAN behaves. Don't forget in order for a boy to be a boy he HAS to have a father. Whether that father lives in the home with the boy doesn't matter, it is what the father SHOWS his son that does. So stop putting the blame on mothers just because you were born a boy.

Answer 3

I think it shouldn't all be on the mother's shoulders. Men should be good role models for their sons as well. If a man is being a pig to a woman then the son is going to see this and think it's ok. That's how they learn. It's passed down from generation to generation, for the most part. I think that mother's should do their part and teach their children respect but the father's need to step up to the plate too and set a good example for their boys.

Answer 4

I am a mother of a 5 year old boy, and I am teaching him right now how to treat women the right way. If I do not start now then he will be just like the rest on todays men. I also am teaching him as he grows how to be a good family man.

Answer 5

OK look it's like this you are looking at a line of men who are coming along. Think about where men are at from where they began. when your grandparents were parents it was perfectly acceptable for the husband to beat her to cheat on her and she sat quietly smiled and pretended nothing was wrong. heck I am sure she never even had a job depending on how old you are.

So your dad grew up with the notion that women are worthless they are not to be respected and he taught it to you.

you have no respect for your mother nor any other woman and its not your fault it's not your dad's fault it is the fault of the woman who brought you into this world who fed you who gave you every thing she possibly could who helped you with your home work who prayed for you when you were walking through troubled times who sat up crying because you were disrespectful. what would you have her do ? who cared for you when you were sick and well reread what you wrote and think. real hard whose fault it is she loved you and didn't knock you on you butt well that would surely teach you something huh

Answer 6

More than likely, I can bet that these "men' where raised by single mothers, probably young mothers, who were left by sperm donars, so these young mothers probably over compinsate with these children because they have no father around. It is not easy to be alone raising children, specailly sons with no father around. I don't think anyone should judge these mothers until they can walk a mile in thier shoes. So why not wonder why it is solely a mothers job to teach respect.

Answer 7

A woman cannot be used unless she allows herself to be used. There is nothing that says you have to have sex with a guy before you are married to him. In fact, if you stopped being promiscuous, you probably would eventually find someone who respects you and would consider asking you to be his wife. There is an old saying - "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". That saying still stands today. Guys don't want a permanent relationship with a girl who sleeps with every guy she dates. They only want that kind of girl for sex and fun. There are good guys how there that will treat you with respect if you are respectable.

Answer 8

Why are you placing all the blame and responsibility on the mother?? What about the fathers? Can't you see your question is sexist?

My son loves me to death but having a mom teach him isn't the same thing as having the dad set the example.

Answer 9

I think that you have hit it on the head. If women knew how to teach their sons to be good fathers and husbands, then there wouldn't be as many divorces, would there? But as good a mommy as I am, I am never, ever, ever going to be a good father. Noone with a vagina is. Sorry, ladies...much to my husband's ex's chagrin, a divorced woman raising the kids without daddy is asking for trouble. What? He's abusive? (Yeah, that is claimed so much more than is actual.) Then pick someone who is a good man. And be a good woman to deserve him.

Okay, I'll get off the soapbox now...

Answer 10

I would explain What a father is in the eyes of God. Having a baby in no way makes you a parent. Rather then focus on him honoring a man in jail due to a disgusting crime. I would look at the positive If he asks about his dad I would be honest pending your sons age however, I would be working on my new family as that is the dad he should honor.