I just screwed my boss...should I worry about my job?

Question

Last night me & some coworkers went out & our boss went out w/ us. I never really hung out much w/ my coworkers especially my boss...so I decided to chill w/ them for at least one night. Now my boss is 34 (I'm 23), blond, beautiful body, she's gorgeous & she just recently got divorced. We started out at my house where I invited everyone to come b/c I decided to cook b4 we go out & drink. It never came across my mind that she liked me...she rarely talks to me. Anyway, while I was gettin' the food ready she just looked at me the whole time w/out saying a word, I didn't think anything of it. On the way to the bar I was ridin in the backseat of my coworkers car & she decides to jump in the backseat w/ me...again...I didn't think anything of it. Then we get to the bar & she instantly pulls me close to her, puts her hand on my face & whispers to me how she's wanted me ever since I started workin & that she loves spanish guys. She wants a relationship, I don't. Will I get fired?

Answer 1

Perhaps rather then the approaches the others have suggested? You speak to her calmly and rationally about the problem, rather then reject her advances outright, mention that you have a number of concerns about a possible relationship that you're not too comfortable with.

Perhaps begin with the "rebound" possibility, and speak to her about it. You could potentially help her through the whole thing, as you would a close friend, and set the tone of the relationship to platonic. One way of worming out of a relationship you don't want, and making a friend out of your boss too.

If she's insistant she wants a relationship, and that she keeps trying to deflect you away from the platonic path, perhaps you say.

"I understand what you're after, and to be honest, i do find you attractive myself, but these are concerns that may well flare up in future. In matters of the heart, mistakes are painfully costly. I'm not saying i don't want a relationship at all, but i'd like to help you through your first, and perhaps then once we've known each other a little better, we'll know what we should do."

Answer 2

Need to know more about the organization of where you work. I work for a large Fortune 500 company and by our protocol, SHE would be the one who should be concerned about her job (except for the fact that your question headline indicates you did consent to sex with her.) Her actions (before you engaged in sex)could certainly be intepreted as harrassment since, based on your description, you did nothing to provoke this come on. However, NOW you are BOTH in a bad situation. Is she personally responsible for firing people where you work? Do you have a union in your company? Who does she report to, that you can talk to if something bad comes of this? Learn about how your company handles human resources issues in case this goes sour. It all depends on the protocol of your place of business. She should not use any such relationship or interaction as leverage against you, i.e, threaten to fire you if you do not continue the relationship, etc. That is harassment and is illegal. Any such threats that she makes, take notes and include the time and date of the occurrence...Keeping a record of such stuff is important. AND---- DON'T EVER, EVER do anything or say anything that could be misconstrued as a sexual advance or she may claim YOU harrassed HER. If you have to speak to her in a room or office, ALWAYS KEEP THE DOOR OPEN. Try to have other people around when you deal with her, as often as possible.....Just some suggestions.

Answer 3

Sticky situation, know this doesn't help now considering its all been done but you should have clarified what she wanted before you slept with her :o/ now the ball is really in her court, yes she will most likely be upset if she wants a relationship and you don't but whether or not your job is at stake depends on the type of person she is. Legally she can't terminate your position because of that but yeah a woman scorned sometimes doesn't think logically.

Answer 4

Well, if you screwed her, you've entered a relationship. At 34 she's still got the looks that come with plenty of female hormones, but her male hormones are beginning to have their effect -- women in their mid-30s are often beginning to get seriously randy - they need sex in a way they didn't when they were younger -- in fact they tend to be a bit like teenage boys. She's not going to be easy to get rid of unless she finds someone else she fancies.

Answer 5

This is a hard one... i hope i worded that right lol now seriously, umm... well if she tells you that she wants a relationship then tell her that you are not ready and that you just want to keep it professional but I would begin to prepare for the worst if she's "that kind of boos" u know the ones who want it their way or the highway. well buddy, i guess the highway aint soundin so bad rite now huh?
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Answer 6

That is called sexual harrassment and it is illegal. If she tells you she will fire you write down every thing that was said and take it to a lawyer or to the employment commission and tell them. Some how coming from women it's worse than from men. It's very degrading. Don't do it.

Answer 7

Tell her that it won't be a good idea to date since relationships don't always work out and you wan't to keep things running good at work. Remember if she tries to fire you over something like this her job is in danger and I'm sure she is aware of that.

Answer 8

YEP fired for any nit picky reason in the world. Co-workers sleeping together is a no-no. Sleeping with the boss is a bigger no-no

Answer 9

Talk to her about the situation. Try the mature approach, Instead of lurking in the shadows and jumping into bushes to avoid talking about it. It may be awkward, but trust me, It'll be worse if you ignore it.

Answer 10

dude now you have a green light to be a slacker at work. She can be your work girlfriend. Boneing the boss is risky business you need to play your cards right and you'll be ok