I feel so depressed. I am only 13. I want out.?

Question

I have been so sad and depressed lately. At school my teacher asked me what was wrong and even told me I looked depressed. I told her I was fine even though I was hurt on the inside. She sent me to the counselor and I told her I was fine too. She didn't believe me but I wouldn't break down and tell her. She only let me go because I had good grades and couldn't think of anything else to do. My teacher hasn't said anything to me sense. Now I wish she would. Now I just want help. I don't care what I have to do. I just don't want to go to her and tell her because I am too shy but I do want her help. She was the only one of my teachers smart enough to know I was depressed. I not close enough to my parents to just come straight out and tell them. I don't know what to do anymore. I am afraid if I don't get help, I will do something stupid and hurt myself. Please give me suggestions on what to say to my teacher or how to get her help.

I have already asked a question on suicide and cutting myself.
I have always been smart and have gotten all A's but now I have like 3 B's. I have always been perfect (or as close to perfect as you can get) and I hate that. People think I do everything perfect. That's not true. I SCREW UP TOO!!!

Answer 1

Hi tennisluver,
It is good that you have turned for advice. You are right indeed, you are still young~~and as it is, you have still a lot to learn. It is not entirely your fault~~you are born in a particular generation and time and with some kind of peers and environment. Actually, it is far more than meets the eye.
I hope you are understanding what I am saying. There is a Chinese calligraphy which is interpreted as "chaos" and as the same time, it is accepted to mean "opportunity" as well.
So you see, one thing good in being a seeming crisis is that, in actuality, it is an opportunity, a confluence of circumstances that affords one a rare psychic environment whereby one can effectually initiate a drastic change, a paradigm shift. Otherwise not...
This is a time to refocus yourself and reassess your value system. This is a time to distance yourself from "the sheep mentality" whereby people follow mindlessly the trend without thinking things through.
I repeat, reassess your value system. Stop putting your values on externalities but rather come to know and establish a belief system born of actual personal experience. You are the child of a Divine Father who loves you and you are so much precious. Embark into the inner journey which is the real journey. Learn Meditation and come to know your Self.

Answer 2

It may be the hardest thing to think about actually doing, but it is so necessary in order for you to grow and develop into a healthy adult, mentally and physically. The "thing" is to get out and be active, be around other people, and begin to develop friendships. We are social beings and if our social needs are not met, we shrivel and die from depression and loneliness. Getting involved in something that you like and enjoy doing is the right step in making a change in your life and your outlook. The only way to bring about healing and growth is to start.....it won't happen if you do not seek for it to happen. It is your life. What do you want to be remembered for after you're gone? That you were a depressed and lonely child who suffered greatly at the hand of circumstances or that you were a resilient, courageous, and strong person who overcame life's difficulties one day at a time? Think past today. Think about your children. When they are 13, do you want them to be where you are? No? Then make the changes you can in your life right now so that it will be different for you and your kids. Seek counseling, my friend. It is imperative that you have counseling/therapy and also ask about medications for this long-standing depression. It can and will get better, and today you've made your first step towards that goal!

Answer 3

Sweetheart, go to your teacher and tell her she was right but you were too shy to say so. You are not alone, they will help you. Don't take a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You would create a whole bunch of new problems for your family and friends who love you dearly. Your life is short enough. You need to find the inner strength to pull yourself up and dust yourself off, the first thing is admitting that you want help. Bravo good girl, I am proud of you. The second thing now is to go to your teacher, principal or family doctor, councillor and tell them you are having a problem and if you cannot talk to them you need to find a safe haven perhaps a granparent, nobody will turn their back there is so much help out there for you. You didn't say what the problem was just that you were depressed. Write all your feelings down on paper and read it over to try to understand why you are feeling depressed, and even if you don't want to share it with anyone, you can read it until you understand then share it with the adult of your choice. I have faith in you sweetie. God bless you and put angels on your pillows. big hug.. Good luck

Answer 4

Ask your teacher if you can meet with her in private and tell her exactly what you said here. That you were shy, scared, and thought you could deal with this on your own. You are going through puberty and hormonal fluctuations can cause depression in some people. 13 is a delicate age.
You could be prescribed as antidepressant as go through therapy with a counselor from your school or even one not related to school.
Please remember that you only need to do your best and you're right no one is perfect nor should they be expected to be.
I think you should try to tell your parents as well - it seems like you have quite a bit of pressure in your life and if they realize how much you are struggling they should be able to help you out.

Answer 5

Look sweetheart, go back to the counselor and tell her what you're feeling. I went to a counselor when I was in school, and I still remember how much she helped me a lot of years later! Don't worry about being perfect or screwing up. Walk up to your teacher and tell her that you really are depressed and would like her help. If anything happened to you, how do you suppose that she'd feel?

Answer 6

For starters you need to start accepting yourself about that not perfect thing in you. Second and I hope you take this from someone who was there long ago YOU need to get some help. At this stage I doubt it matters who you go to as long as you go. If this can wait until Monday (it's Friday now) fine but if not tell your folks or anyone you trust about what is making you feel so depressed. Is there a friend whose mom you can talk to? If this is ok to wait until monday then when you see your teacher just ask her to talk. She will be glad you are coming back to her as she most likely has been waiting for you to reach that point of asking again. All you need to do is tell her " you remember when I said I was OK? I am not and I can't talk to my folks about it so can we talk? Ihope this works out for you but please if you start feeling like your going to hurt yourself call the local hotline or are you aware there is a 24/7 that is toll-free. There are people there who will talk or just listen. Why not call them tonight? You can reach them at 1-800-448-3000

Answer 7

its ok to ask for help...everyone does one time or another. i know talking to your counselor or teacher can be hard, and your parents even harder but no one is going to judge you for feeling this way. its important to recognize that this is just one moment in your whole life and you will NOT always feel this way. if you are embarrased to speak with someone who knows you, there are crisis lines where people volunteer to be there to LISTEN TO YOU and help you identify what is making you feel this way. (even though i am sure when you think about it something specific comes to mind and then you feel even worse) but talking about what is hurting you makes it not seem so bad, so overwhelming and then it becomes easier to manage. exploring ways to hurt yourself should be an indicator to YOU that taking the steps to confide in someone needs to happen. you dont have to be perfect, you just have to be you and you cant do that if you arent here. and if that doesnt make sense to you, think about the look on your mother's face when she finds your body or when the police come to her door.. all she will think is "i wish she would have just told me something was wrong, i could have helped her." you are worth fighting for. so fight! dont worry about what people will think or what will happen later. hold on minute by minute, second by second and help yourself to feel better. you are the most important thing in more lives than you can imagine. dont give up so easy!!

Answer 8

Is there something specific that you are sad about? If you are just feeling sad without a specific reason, that is depression, and you should probably go back to the counselor, say that you thought the feeling was something you thought would just go away and you were afraid of being embarrassed or just didn't want to waste her time. She will understand.

Answer 9

Its obvious your teacher wants to help, but there isn't much she can do if you don't confide in her. Go to her after class and tell her that you've been feeling depressed, but don't know what to do. I'm sure she and your school counselor will help you with the next step towards getting better, including how to talk to your parents.

Answer 10

Oh, sweety, I'm so sorry. I'm in my mid 30's & have had severe depression before. I strongly urge you to definitely talk to your teacher, since you apparently feel comfortable w/her. You can just tell her you want to talk to her in private when she has a little bit of time to spare, then talk to her honestly about how you're feeling. She can help you out, point you in the right direction. This sounds serious if you're thinking it could get bad enough to hurt yourself...please get some help--none of us are perfect, we all need a little guidance from time to time.