What is your opinion about toddlers and long drives?

Question

I was supposed to go a wedding that is 7 hours away and I have 2 year old. She doesn't like long trips. I talked to the person about not being able to go because of some things I need to do and plus my child won't sit for a long time in a car. She tells me that her brother's daughter had no problem with the trip and that I needed to discipline my child. I told her that the child is more tame than mine and she is a little holder than my child. I didn't say anything but it made me mad because she thinks that I don't discipline my child because she doesn't like to sit in the car for long trips. Do you think that it is right to say a child isn't disciplined because they don't want to sit in the car for a long time?

Answer 1

My 2 year old doesn't like long trips either. When we did one last month, we made sure to stop a lot to eat and stretch and change diapers. Also we had plenty of things for her accessible such as her favorite music, snack stuff, sippy cups of milk and water, etc.. It can be done but it is not fair to say that your daughter isn't disciplined! Mine is disciplined and she is a great kid but who wants to be stuck in a car for 7 hours? And she is only 2!! What's in it for her?? She's too young to understand.... I agree that this was an unfair statement to make. You just do what's best for you. People don't understand what it is like to have a kid till they have one. (Unfortunately, I was one of those people!!)

Answer 2

It's not right to say a child isn't disciplined because they don't want to sit in the car (since many adults don't like to either), but it's also not right to let a child's likes/dislikes dictate whether or not you attend a special event. It wasn't a medical thing that caused you to back out on your friend's special day, it was your kid's preference... kids need to learn at some point that there's things they don't like but they still have to do them. Pack a lot of fun stuff, load up on CDs, make frequent stops, and if she throws a tantrum, then discipline her. My parents took myself and my two siblings on an 18-hour car trip when we were 9, 7, and 5. It can be done, and make it worth her while to sit in the car that long. Maybe a special treat when she gets there, and then for the return trip. Believe me, using your child's dislike as an excuse really sounds to the person that you didn't want to go in the first place and needed to find some way of getting out of it.

Answer 3

no that isn't right . the person was just annoyed you didn't go to the wedding. Most people dont like long car trips doesn't mean shes not disciplined so take no notice and you cant have the 'perfect child' And after spending so long in the car why would you and her then want to go on to spend all day at a wedding. To then go back into the car for 7 hours

Answer 4

Some children love car rides others do not.

Maybe you could try taking your daughter for an hour drive each night or something....

If someone was saying I don't discipline my child I'd be fairly upset with that and likely wouldn't go to the wedding because I wouldn't want my undisciplined child there to ruin the wedding!! jeez! some people.

I bet the person who said that doesn't have a child! Am I right?

People need to have children of their own to say stuff like that. Babysitting for a few days doesn't mean you know how all children are or even how to figure out when they need discipline.

I don't have children but I've worked in day cares and helped raise my nephew plus I'm only 19- so no children. But even I know that children are all different and you cannot discipline them for simply not liking long drives!

Answer 5

heck, my 6 year old can't even sit in the same seat for 7 hours, and your freind expects a 2 year old to do it?

maybe you could leave the child with a sitter while you go to the wedding alone, my husband and I have done that a couple of times, becuase we know our kids are unable to sit in the car for long periods of time.

If you have to take her, like almost everyone else has said, take frequent breaks, maybe you could look on a map and see what towns are in between your destination and plan on stopping at a few of them, I'd take at least 3 breaks, during the whole trip. and bring snacks, yes they may get all over the car, but my 4 year old usually only acts up in the car when she's hungry, another idea is, you could buy your daughter some new coloring books and toys to take with her in the car on the trip, if they are new then they might keep her entertained for a longer period of time.

Answer 6

No, it's not right. She's a toddler, so won't understand...so what do they expect you to do......beat her? That's insane. I remember when I was young.......not a toddler of course. We'd go on vacation, and I hated it.....because I got so bored. That's the same thing with your child. If there was something to keep her occupied, then it would be bad....but a 7 hour trip is asking a lot from a toddler....there and back. They can just sleep for so long. If she can't stay the time at a friend's or parent's house...then I would seriously question the trip. You don't need her freaking out in her car seat, and getting your attention off of the road ahead.

Answer 7

Honestly - some children do better on car trips than others. I was going on long distance trips from the time I was about 6 mths old and my mother claims I was one of the best car riders she's known.

The important thing to remember with small children and long distance car trips is that it is important to plan your trip carefully. If your daughter is antsy in the car make several stops along the way and be sure to allow time for them. Pack an activity bag with some of her favorite toys, books - colors and paper if you feel daring. :-) And don't forget the snacks. My little one always traveled well for an hour or so when she had a few goldfish crackers in her tray.

Long distance traveling with the young is not a joy ride to be sure, but it can be done with proper strategizing. I hope I was able to offer some tips for you and that you have more success with your daughter and car trips in the future!

Answer 8

Nope...it has nothing to do with discipline...and your friend's comments had nothing to do with bad parenting...she was just being selfish.

Seven hours is a long time for an adult...it would be torture for a 2 year old. Good on ya for recognizing that your daughter's comfort is more important than your fun at a wedding. Life changes when you have a child...their life will always take presidence over yours. She didn't ask to be born....she was your indulgence. And now you are making her a priority. Wonderful! Wish more parents were like you...

Answer 9

when my husband and I moved we had to travel 2,000 miles with a 1 1/2 year old. We moved from GA to AZ. Overall she was pretty good, but there were times where it was very difficult. We allowed lots of time for her to get out and stretch her legs and run. It wasn't easy, but overall, like I said not bad.

Personally, I wouldn't want to go to the wedding of someone who is as opionated as the person you just mentioned. She doesn't seem like a good friend to me and I wouldn't want to waste my time.

However, if you decided to go to the wedding, after the ceremony and everything is over, you could give her some advice of what she could have done to make it more beautiful.

Mean maybe, but it would pound home a point. It would also make this person think twice before being inconsiderate again.
If you don't like that idea, I would say call her out on what she said and how it offended you. Especially if she doesn't have kids, she has no right to judge.

Answer 10

I was a very good kid, and I still hated long rides, because I always got very sick. Many adults also get very bored, and antsy.
In case you every need to go on a long trip you might want to come up with ways to entertain your child during long rides (coloring books, toys, etc). Also, take breaks more frequently than you normally would, Worked like charm for my sister's kids.However, you can comfortably tell that rude person to **** off. It's none of her business to tell you to discipline your child.