how can i resist the urge?

Question

to not call my ex. he has made me so upset that sometimes i feel just like giving him a piece of my mind. i know for a fact he will call me again one day. hes not calling to make me mad. well its working cuz i want him to know how i feel about that. i want him to know who in the world told him he was so special that i need to run up behind him. he was the one who ruined this relationship and now he has the nerve to be mad at me for being upset. how can i not pick up the phone and curse him out. who does he think he is. you wouldnt believe how much he makes me sick and i want him to know it so bad. but if i call him it will give him so much satisfaction. but the urge is killing me. he has lied and been controlling for 2 1/2 yrs and im fed up. so how does he have the nerve to be upset like i did something to him. plz give me some ideas on how to avoid the temptation to call this jack A

Answer 1

Hi

Wow !! me and you are in the same boat . Telling him off will not do any good it will only prove to him that he can get to you . Besides you have something to smile about , that he is no longer in your life . Take it from me it is not even worth the effort or your precious time to say anything . Pray to GOD if you pray at all because that is what helped me get over my ex and even though the hurt may reappear from time to time it is getting easier for me to see clearly that my ex was not the one for me.

Sometimes we cannot see the positives because our hearts are so full of hurt but I do beleive in Karma . ( What goes around comes around ) .

Take care and work on mending .

Answer 2

1.) Go to the bookstore and buy "It's Called a Break-Up Because It's Broken." Read it. Live it.
2.) Know that by calling him, it's not going to change anything. He'll still be a jerk, and he'll still have wronged you. If you docall him, he'll go out there and tell everyone what a psycho-***** ex you are. Don't give him the satisfaction.
3.) Write a letter to him saying all that you want to say, then don't send it.
4.) Make a list of 10 things to do instead of calling him, then do them.
5.) Cut off all contact. He's not worth your time. Mr. Fab is out there, this guys's obviosuly not it, and not worth your precious time and energy.

Answer 3

This is a hard situation. My suggestion is to get a tape recorder or something, or go into an empty room, or call a friend who will listen (other than the idiot who's upsetting you), or just a simple pen and some paper and speak/right/scream/scribble what you want to say. Make sure he never hears it.
Tape recorders are nice because you can burn the tapes later if you want to, or you can shred/rip/tear the paper after you've written the message.
Talking to a friend might help, but make sure it's a friend who won't interrupt your rant. Or, just go into an empty room and talk to yourself, tell him everything you want to say without saying it.

If you get the words out, maybe you won't so much need to have him hear them.

Answer 4

Write it all down. Write down every little thing you want to say to him and depending on how you feel afterwards, you can crumple it, burn it, put in under your pillow... whatever you want to do. This will take away a lot of your frustration.

If he lied and controlled you for that long, unless you really love him or he really REALLY looks to want to change, don't let him call you back. Move on. If it does somehow work out, you'll be so glad you never did that, but you could at one point let him read it.

Personally, I know how you feel and I'd write it all down and watch it burn, them stomp on the ashes. He doesn't have to hear it to make it true.

Answer 5

man you really let it out. are you telling him on here or something? call his a s s. tell him off. just dont call ever again and do not get back with him. i think he is trying to get you to feel bad and think that he is not upset about the breakup. in that way, you(like you are) are wanting to call him. if you do call him, which you can, he will probably try a guilt trip on you to get you weak and then move into the make up. it really does work, biatches have done it to me before. it sounds like you do like him but are you not better off? could this be worked out (his controlling) without breaking up? be careful though, controlling men will control, thats what they do. if you do call him, stay strong, give him a piece of your mind and then get off the phone. dont let him pull the guilt trip, and dont let him pull you back into the relationship. yeah call him and then email me what you said. HA!

Answer 6

Write it all down and then throw it away. It will make you feel better. And you're right, it will only give him the satisfaction that he still has control over you, he is directing your emotions. Or you can get a punching bag, tape his picture up there and punch the hell out of it. hhhhmmmmmmm that sounds like a good idea, I think I'll do that too..........

Answer 7

Everytime you feel the urge, walk towards your phone and then turn around 180 degrees and head outside. Take a walk to the end of the driveway/parking lot. I can assure you of one thing; he likely doesn't care how you feel if his manipulative. He may only want to string you along. You owe him nothing, the least of which is your energy and peace of mind or piece of mind! Good luck.

Answer 8

You know, quite honestly, I think you should go ahead and call him and get it off your chest. He may get the satisfaction of knowing that he upset you, but he already has that. You're not doing it for his satisfaction, you're doing it for you. Call the prick up and give him the verbal beat down you think he deserves. Some may not agree with me, but my ex-wife did it and she felt so much better. But after you do it, let go of the anger, it's not healthy for you. He did what he wanted to do for him....It's your turn, do it for you.

Answer 9

Good rant! Sometimes that makes us better in itself, just to let it out! Well, you said it. You're fed up with his control and lies. So, why subject yourself to them any more by calling him? Wait til he calls you and do him then.

Answer 10

The fact that you posted this question means he is winning. Ignore him