Its my Dad's birthday today and all year long we take the pi*s out of him cos his hair is falling out! Can anyone think of a good bald joke to put in his birthday card?
2007-02-23 01:00:44 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
suck my balls
2007-02-23 01:03:19 · answer #1 · answered by ibs 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Happy birthday to your dad - my birthday also today :)
A man goes into a barber advertising David Beckham-style cuts. Half an hour later he's horrified to see his head half bald and covered in cuts. "That's not how David Beckham has his hair," complains the man.
"It would be if he came here, replies the barber.
A man goes into a barber's and asks for a haircut that leaves his fringe at different lengths round his head, creates two bald spots near the back, a spiky bit at the side, and leaves a large nick on his ear. "I'm not sure we could manage that," says the barber. "It sounds pretty tricky."
"I don't see why," says the man. "It's the same haircut you gave me the last time I was here.
Harry went to a new barber and was horrified to find that a trim would be £20. "But I'm practically bald," says Harry. "How can it cost £20?"
The barber replies, "To be honest the cut is only £5. The other £15 is a search fee. :)
2007-02-23 02:07:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definition of baldness:-When you have less hair to comb but more face to wash.
There's one thing about baldness:It's neat.
A man is not going bald-he is in follicle regression.
A bald man sat down in the barber's shop and said to the barber:" I went for a hair transplant,but I couldn't stand the pain.If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you £5000."
So the barber quickly shaved his own head!
.
2007-02-23 01:21:39 · answer #3 · answered by the gunners 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I only have 2 jokes, but I don't know if they are any good.
Can you give me an example of wasted energy?
Yes, telling a hair-raising story to a bald-headed man.
If a man is bald at the front, he is a thinker.
If he is bald at the back, he is sexy.
If he is bald from front to back - he thinks he is sexy.
2007-02-23 08:38:36 · answer #4 · answered by M.O. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dad also has a 'polo hair cut' you know it has a hole in the middle, he says it is a solar panel for a sex machine (which makes my mum fall about laughing), his other stock reply for comments about his baldness is that grass don't grow on a busy street, my kids refer to him as 'shiny grandad'!
2007-02-26 23:50:47 · answer #5 · answered by TreesRGreen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Q. Why do bald guys have holes in their pockets?
A. So they can run their fingers through their hair!
Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
2007-02-23 01:12:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably not appropriate for your dad, but my mate has a sticker on his car that says "I'm not bald, its a solar panel for a sex machine"
2007-02-23 01:12:21 · answer #7 · answered by green cat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whats the best thing bout going bald?
the less hair u have the more head you get!
sorry its pretty lame but all i could think of!
good luck!
2007-02-23 01:06:40 · answer #8 · answered by iguana_papas 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hey Dad, if you wore a turtleneck you would look like roll-on deodorant!
2007-02-23 01:10:02 · answer #9 · answered by brian m 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dad why dont u draw some rabbits on your head ?
why?
so from a distance they look like hairs
2007-02-23 03:43:18 · answer #10 · answered by good bhoy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
2 fish in a tank, one fish says to the other "how the f**k do you drive this thing?"
sorry i didnt read the question how about "hey dad want me to read you a story.. its called baldylocks and the 3 hairs"
2007-02-23 01:04:21 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋