I have a friend who is in a "friendship with benefits" relationship with a man...They have been steady off & on for the last yr now....both claiming there has been NO other sexual partners...
Recently, she professed her love for him....saying that she has decided she wants a one on one....steady relationship...not just sex....he tells her the same thing...
Then, he turns around & tells her that even though he wants a relationship other then this arrangement....he wont make her his GF, since she told him from the beginning that all she wanted was a sex partner.....he says he loves her also....."since he loves ALL his FRIENDS".....yet..he is at her house every day....calls her 20 times a day...& even gets mad if she talks to someone else...or even mentions another man's name....it is jealousy, but he does get mad...then they fight about it....
In this whole yr they have been doing this....he hasnt kissed her...won't hold her hand, but has taken her out...spent the night at her house.
2007-02-22 22:28:01 · 10 answers · asked by mysticfairy74 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
& other things like that...
When she asks him why he wont kiss her....he tells her that he reserves that for his GF relationships, & he doesnt want to hurt her if things change between them...
He recently started talking to someone online...& has lied to her about meeting this girl....
My question is.....What is up?
What is he doing?
I wanna say he is getting his cake & eating it too....BUT...it seems weird that he does things for her at a drop of a hat....& all the things a BF would do, but then say things like that....
What gives?
2007-02-22 22:30:27 · update #1
yeah he's just using her for sex and saying what he thinks she wants to hear to keep the "friends with benifits" going. He's getting jealous if she talks to anyone else because he doesn't want her seeing anyone else and loosing his "fwb". Calling 20 times a day is just another "i need to know what your doing because i don't trust you tactic". Since he's busted talking to another girl online i wouldn't be surprised he's been lookin else where for another FWB relationship or a relationship with someone else.
2007-02-22 22:37:49 · answer #1 · answered by massure4hire 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if his "love" for her isn't on the same level as hers. It sounds like he shows the same "feelings" as she does, just so that he can keep his sexual benefits. Which is why he doesn't want to be her boyfriend..and won't kiss her or hold her hand. And him calling her all the time and getting mad if she talks to someone else.could be plain jealousy...it's possible to get jealous even if theres no feelings attached. Or it could just be another part of his game to lead her to believe he actually loves her..which he probably does, just not in the same way.
My advice- as much as your friend loves the guy, she needs to stop the whole friends with benefits thing. Continuing to have sex with a man she claims to love and who doesn't love her back and doesn't want to be in a relationship with her will end up hurting her if it hasn't already.
2007-02-23 06:37:35 · answer #2 · answered by Kim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, "calls her 20 times a day" did it for me. I would give him (or her) his walking papers. Does this seem harsh? The only time I ever called anyone 20 times was when I was trying to win a pair of tickets from the radio station. I have no tolerance for ANYONE that either is jealous or controlling. Why would she fall in love with this type?
2007-02-23 06:37:33 · answer #3 · answered by WMD 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm im a chic & all i can say is , he is a male , dont trust him now that he has had ur friend as a benefit for a year now SO the best thing u can do as friend is tell her she HAS to move on & get over him, if she cant coz her feelings are leading her 2 a **** than Slap her silly He Doesnt Want Her.........Godluck she needs, poor thing!! xx
Yes he has had his cake for a long tim now & ur friend needs 2stop baking it 4him!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-23 06:32:45 · answer #4 · answered by cookieazz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want a real relationship with her to him she's just a sex object your friend should just let him go and find someone else who wil love her.
2007-02-23 06:41:54 · answer #5 · answered by frado z 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they need to iron out the creases in there relationship. if he loves her that much he should be able to make that commitment. i think he is just pulling her along for the ride. pardon the pun.
2007-02-23 06:37:51 · answer #6 · answered by joey h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess he is keeping his options open in case another girl comes along. My advice...get on with her life n stop wasting her time.
2007-02-23 06:36:36 · answer #7 · answered by rugbystop 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any single woman that has sex with a man, the man will just use her.
2007-02-23 06:43:39 · answer #8 · answered by kayef57 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is definitely eating the cake and having it too.
Ask your friend to dump him.
2007-02-23 08:40:07 · answer #9 · answered by CG 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is sooooooooooooooo long. I got lost somewhere in the middle.
2007-02-23 06:38:20 · answer #10 · answered by Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋